Bug, we're less than a week away from the release of your new movie, the biggest movie of your career. Something that could possibly catapult you to become Sega's mascot for their newest console, how are you fe-

The Bug suddenly throws his hand in front of the interviewer's face to stop them as he basks in the cheering of his adoring fans

....."Finally..... The Bug has come back to Miasmi!"

Crowd roars with thunderous cheering

"Well, The Bug is here. The biggest breakout star of the next generation. The Bug has finished his latest movie, his latest movie that will sweep the entire nation and launch the Sega Saturn to peaks not known by bugkind, bugkind that will remember to shout The Bug's name unlike our moronic interviewer here. Hollywood can hardly contain their panties at the thought of The Bug or his lovely singing voice. The Bug however, hears doubt. Doubt from his usual critics who can't handle going only north, south, east, or west of their fat monkey asses. He hears doubt that The Bug can carry such an illustrious task as to lead the charge and take the fight to the Sony Playstation and kick it's sorry grey bandicoot-lovin' ass. They doubt the greatness of the Sega Away Team, and simply call them the "Sega Buffet Team". They doubt the words of Stephen Hillenburg, Steven Gielberg or whatever that jabroni's name is. Interviewer, do you know what their name is?"

It's Ste-

"IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT THEIR NAME IS!"

Crowd cheers and chants "BUG! BUG! BUG!"

"The Bug says this. The Bug doesn't need validation. The Bug doesn't need approval by crybabies who don't know how to move on a simple four-way grid, and The Bug sure as hell don't need to hear comparisons of him to some jabroni named... "Gex"?! Who in the blue hedgehog hell is that?! He is nothing, The Bug's cellphone rang up. It was nothing, they said they knew him. He's probably eating Chex with a big glass of milk, all while crying about his ex at his mama's house. They're over here shoving chicken mcnuggets straight up their ass while yelling "tail time". Why don't you give The Bug a huge favor, and whip yourself up a nice big glass of "shut up, bitch" juice?! If that tongue-tied D-lister has a problem with The Bug calling it as he sees it, then The Bug can personally give him directions to the Smackdown Roach Hotel. The Bug is gonna take him down Know Your Role Boulevard, The Bug is gonna hang that right at Jabroni Drive. The Bug's gonna take off his size two-and-three quarters boot, he's gonna shine it up real nice, turn that sum-bitch sideways and stick it straight up his chicken-lovin' candy ass!!"

Grabs the mic from interviewer

"IF YA SMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLELELELOW! WHAT THE BUG IS COOKIN."

cue theme music

US Saturn Release #007 - Bug!

Played on a real American Sega Saturn with the Fenrir ODE

Bug is kind of a hard game for me to rank because of how your experience can change with practice. I've played Bug a couple times recently, and I've gotten a lot better at the game, so I hardly feel frustrated with it anymore. Then again, that obviously does not remove the terrible level designs and bullshit segments. However even if I'm not getting mad at all, I'm not having lots of fun, either. It's just kind of mediocre when you get good. On the opposite end, it's horribly frustrating when played for the first time.

The most important thing for you to do is to play the Japanese version if you wish to play this game. The japanese version is much better balanced for newcomers, with Bug getting 5 lives on startup, infinite save reloads, more hit points, more checkpoints, and a better camera. That again does not obscure the level design and the terribly maintained difficulty curve, but it makes the whole thing less stressful.

Considering history, I shouldn't be too hard on Bug. This is possibly one of the first 3D platform games, and if not, at least one that came out before Super Mario 64. Standing at 3D platforming's beginnings can be difficult for development since there's not a lot of groundwork laid out for you considering what a 3D platformer should be. The developers make a lot of mistakes on that route but I can commend them for trying and succeeding in some cases. I admit, Worlds 2, 4, and 6 are pretty fun. It feels like the later in the game you get, the better the designers got at making levels (for the most part. World 5 has a lot of really frustrating segments you essentially have to memorize how to do without doing trial and error, draining your lives).

Dip into the first couple worlds on the Japanese version if you have a Fenrir or some other ODE for your Saturn (or if your computer is good enough for full speed Saturn emulation). Otherwise, I do not recommend you play this one.

4/10

Wow this is like shockingly really bad. Like damn, for a console with so many bangers and hidden gems I was surprised how awful this game is. First off what is with the art direction in this game it’s so ugly. Everything looks like it was hit with a goddamn cartoon frying pan. Second off, these levels man. I think the general concept is stellar, 2.5D worlds you can go in and out of the foreground. Sounds great to me right? It’s terrible. The movement from Bug is so stilted and stiff and going anywhere always feels like a challenge. Doesn’t help these levels are so fucking long and the boss designs really don’t help matters. Idk man, only look into this if you are like me and are really curious about the Saturn’s history. Otherwise, just play any other game from the console it’s not worth it.