Columns

released on Mar 01, 1990

Go back in time to a bygone civilization: the ancient world of Phoenicia. There you will play a simple and captivating game where sparkling, rainbow-coloured jewels drop one after another. According to the ancient merchants, by arranging three or more of the same jewels horizontally, vertically or diagonally, you shall perform miracles.


Also in series

Sega Ages: Columns Arcade Collection
Sega Ages: Columns Arcade Collection
Hanagumi Taisen Columns
Hanagumi Taisen Columns
Super Columns
Super Columns
Columns III
Columns III
Columns II: The Voyage Through Time
Columns II: The Voyage Through Time

Released on

Genres


More Info on IGDB


Reviews View More

actually really fucking fun

This review contains spoilers

It is better than Tetris

Fun fact, this game was the one that made me realize that not all games I emulate on my 3DS are gonna fill the screen the same way. Playing this on my 3DS via TwilightMenu caused a lot of overscan on the sides. The idea of this happening genuinely never crossed my mind before and it seems like this is an issue with all genesis games? I don't really have an issue as long as it doesn't inhibit my ability to play by having things like the UI or enemies/level layout being cropped too bad. But the reason I was able to tell so easily here was because of the two player screen setup.

Anyway, as for the actual game: it was fine. Got way too fast way too quickly for my liking though.

Welp. I did played some similar puzzle games in my life, but this was utterly boring. I still like it better than Dr. Mario in general, but that's a low standard for me.

Played on March 3rd, 2024 (SEGA Genesis Challenge: 49/160)

Nothing really much to remark in regards to what this game is about. It's a game where you stack blocks, but instead of it being in different shapes, you stack them in columns and try to match the same color in a straight line or a diagonal, and this is made possible by rotating the gems before they land on the board.

I will say that the game does get really hard even when you set it to easy which can make it seem rather inaccessible, but the unique angle it takes the block stacking genre of puzzle games does make it worth a look.

One day I will die. My flesh will no longer recall memory, and my atoms will scatter. But as inconsequential as I am, or as this game is, or as is this the brief little event where I played half a game because my wife recognized it at Round 1 and I had to stop playing so we could move along and jeer at the awful music - as long as I live, and maybe in a cycle of reincarnation, and maybe in the Akashic Records somewhere, eternally exists my discomfort at the ugly visuals, the piercing trebly FM synth bell tones, and the awful control behind this miserable game. It is seared into my being, my gray matter forced to replay the minor cringing feeling through the rest of my body from the recesses of my memory, a reaction to becoming one with this disposable market share grab at Tetris. It tangentially influences my personality like a star billions of miles away. It is nothing to me, and everything.

I don't need to think about it ever again. Why must my brain remember this so vividly in response to seeing it on this website? What use does this do for my life, or anyone else's life, or the universe? At least it makes me think about this stuff, in the same way an interaction with someone at a Wendy's or a particularly loud fart might.

God is dead. Life is wonderful. Just don't play Columns.

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"like Tetris but a bit better" - Glenn Rubenstein on Columns, Wizard Magazine, 1993