This is the only game I have ever returned. I have nothing good to say about it.

If I strongly dislike a game but it functions at the very least, I feel like I could grace it with a whole star. This crashed early into my playthroughs (multiple, because I actually tried to give it a chance despite how boring it was). Can you even comprehend what it would take to disappoint a patient, easily-impressed, age-in-the-single-digits child?