Now that the distraction's out of the way, it's time to finish this fucking game lmfao. Kiwami 1 was a solid remake, but remaking the first one was bound to have some problems attached. It's Yakuza 1. After it dropped, RGG didn't know if they were gonna even make another one, and you could tell at the end. But, we actually got another one, and here we are with Kiwami 2, the remake of the second one, this time coming in on the brand spanking new dragon engine. I think Kiwami 2 is one of the better games in the series, whether that's a hot take or not idk, it feels like any take with this series is hot to someone.

Kiwami 2's story has some batshit dumb twists (cough secret korean cough) but goddamn I'd be lying if I said I wasn't engaged. It's another "Tojo clan is about to freaking collapse Kiryu help us bro" type of plot, but involving an old grudge and a bloodline bound by fate. First off, I love the new cast of characters here, Karou rocks and Ryuji is an all timer antagonist. Old characters return here too, Haruka, Date, the Florist, Majima, etc. Yakuza really has such an interesting and wide cast that it can get away with any goofy ass plot twist or rugpull and still take itself seriously. Yakuza has some dumb fuck rugpulls in the series, but a part of me fucking loves it. I guess I'm a sucker for dumb shit twists. Granted, here some twists you knew from the first minute but at the end it was supposed to be a big eye revealing twist, but hey, it's okay cuz Gary Buster Holmes is here again. There's also a new little storyline for Majima, for people who love Yakuza 0. I love Yakuza 0, and I love this (plot wise at least). Kiwami 2's story is endearing and great, but fucking batshit, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Hoo boy the gameplay. Remember how I said this game is on a new engine? Well, the dragon engine was a bit rough at first, and goddamn, it can be rough. Granted, Kiwami 2 is fun to play 90% of the time. It's not godawful combat that I've seen others say, but it's jank. It is undeniably jank. Sometimes enemies will be on the ground, and the new engine lets you swat at em from the ground, but Kiryu will just fucking miss. And of course, the most infamous thing about the engine: the ragdolls. Oh. My. God. 90% of fights for me the ragdoll will start jumping all over the place, and it was always entertaining. It's actually insane with how janky the ragdolls are. Fights also happen in real time, so you can take fights inside establishment, and have the worker there get pissed at you and not sell you shit. It's pretty cool. Now, Kiryu is fun to play, but the Majima Saga's gameplay fucking sucks. It's only three chapters so there wasn't a whole lot put in there, so Majima feels so limited, and it's so jank to play. You still got your side stuff too, golf, baseball, the arcades actually have arcade games here unlike Kiwami 1 with that stupid fucking mesuking shit. Kiwami 2 is junk food gameplay, it's bad for you but it's fun.

I like a lot of the side stuff here. Substories here are so much better than Kiwami 1's, you got some iconic ones like the mommy milkers fetish guy (it's as weird as it sounds), you got faux kiryu, and some others. Fun stuff. But outside of substories, you got some other things as well. Clan creator is here too, a little sidepiece about Majima Construction, glory be to it. I think it's fun and goofy but the last mission can go fuck itself. Cabaret Club Czar is also here, with some more 0 fan service too. It works basically the same, and it's a fun distraction from the main plot, if you liked the 0 club czar missions you'll like it, the gooners will like it, I liked it. Alas, no buff dudes and tough guys to hire to beat the shit out of other dudes, so it pales to the construction subplot.

Yakuza game with a good OST I'm shocked. The jazzy battle theme in Sotenbori (Outlaw's Lullaby) has so much sauce, the Majima Construction anthem is so goddamn catchy too. Update with Gunfire is a jam too. The Sound of Breath is a decent track too, it's used in a lot of scenes though lmfao. Karaoke is fun here too, you got Like a Butterfly from 6 which is just so fucking funny his glasses man it's fire. Majima has a song here too which breaks my heart. The OST is good. Thumbs up.

This is one of the better Yakuza games I'd argue. From it's batshit but captivating plot, the cast, the music, the side content, and fuck it I'll say it, even the gameplay at points, it all just works nicely. Now it's time to replay 3.

wonder whats inside of sexy pub prison tho

Memento Mori

I remember the night I beat Persona 3. It was a late hot night, around May. I remember the March 5 scene so vividly, getting hit with that screen transition that takes you to the credits, being bitch slapped by Memories of You. It's one of those things that sticks with you. Now, years later, and here we are with that remake that was endlessly rumored about. To preface this, this is kind of a double "review" in a way, I wanna compare and contrast the original with the remake, what works more and what doesn't, and all of that. The TL;DR: give both versions a whirl at some point.

I feel like the original Persona 3 is a game that I should love more than I do. Don't get me wrong, if you asked I'd tell you "yeah I think Persona 3 is remarkable and one of my most cherished video game experiences." It's themes of death and memory, it's story, it's cast, it all just resonated with me so hard, and the social aspects of it are neat to an extent as well. Top that off with that rad as fuck soundtrack, and it's a hell of an experience. But as a game, I don't have all too much fun with it. Now, I know that I'm picky with turn based, I don't hate it but it's not my favorite type of gameplay. It can be fun I don't wanna sound like some obnoxious ass, but it's not always engaging, and P3's gameplay was rough to me. I know why it is the way it is, I get it and respect that choice, but here's where I stand: If I'm not having fun, then it's not good to me. I don't like tartarus all too much, it can be a slog; I don't like not being able to directly tell my teammates what moves to do, I know the tactics are there but it can still be messy. But the story, cast, and theme really make the strife worthwhile. So the remake was announced and I had some worries but wanted to be optimistic. I haven't been as in love with Persona as I was since I was 18 (I still love the sub series but man, talking about it isn't very fun lmfao) but I was cautiously optimistic, and with every piece of info I got less scared about the remake. Atlus is a weird company, they suck but they know how to make a good game, and the remake is good. Really really REALLY good.

To get a teeny tiny bit personal, death is something that I've been thinking about every day now for over a decade. Even more so now, and I feel like a lot of us have been, with that pandemic and things just going to shit around a lot of us, myself included. It's hard not to think about it. With that, it feels like this remake dropped at the perfect timing. P3 was one of those games that could help me kinda cope with some of life's issues (and Death Stranding kino peak game), so having this game rn in a brutally tough chapter of life is nice. Despite the depressive storybeats and all that, Persona 3 is one of the most life-affirming games out there. It's beautiful. And the remake really nails it. It doesn't change too much to make it an entirely different experience, but makes the changes it needed to make.

I won't get into spoilers, but I do still wanna talk about the story, why it's important, and why it works so well. Persona 3 on paper is a "prevent the end of the world" plot that has layers and layers of shit in it. There is a ton of depth with the characters, the story, and the themes. The cast is so great, they all have their flaws and vices, and you watch them all grow throughout the game as they experience both fond memories and terrible tragedy, and all these experiences shape them up, and it's done and told fantastically. I think overall P3's story is my favorite in the subseries, and here it's basically unchanged. Reload does make some additions that, while they don't fix my complaints, add needed context and scenes to flesh out these characters. It's not really spoilery I think, but there's another group in the game called Strega, and aside from Chidori, they were just so bland and one note. The new scenes expand their story and purpose in the plot and I like that, but Takaya is still really goofy at points and Jin is just boring. As for the dub, well, I think a part of me will always prefer the original, but I do like this dub. To highlight some of the performances, I think Fuuka's VA is genuinely great, I love how "gooberish" she sounds in the original, her OG VA sucks in an endearing way, but here she really fits the character good. I've seen people complain about Yukari's VA but I don't see the complaints. I think she's great too. Akihiko's still leaves me mixed, not a jab at the VA himself, but something doesn't click. I got used to it but it still was on my mind. Mitsuru and Junpei are basically one to one for me, especially Junpei he fucking nailed it. He got Junpei down to a tee, he stole the show for me. A part of me thinks it's cute to have the OG cast in some minor roles, kinda like a passing of the torch, but at the same time it feels like they were right there but just decided not to for some odd reason. Overall, Reload had me hooked once more. Can't stress enough how great the story of P3 is without getting into spoilers, but fuck, it's just great.

Social links were the new thing at the time of P3's release, adding a new layer to the gameplay. You had your high school life in the day, and the dungeon crawling at night. Social links were not only little side stories for characters both in your squad and randos in the world, but were tied in to the persona fusion mechanics as well. The higher the rank, the more XP you'd get from fusing in that arcana, and if you max the arcana out, you'd be able to fuse the ultimate persona of that arcana. It was an interesting mechanic to add in the game, and I think I like the mechanic in a way. It adds some depth to both the gameplay and the world as well. Interacting with not just your squad but people outside of it make the world feel bigger to me. As for the quality of them, well, P3 has some of the weaker SLs as a whole I'd argue, but it was the new thing so, hey. Not to say there wasn't ones I liked. I think the main cast had great links, and my all time favorite social link is here with the Sun arcana in Akinari Kamiki. But with every Kamiki or Yukari, there's that fat piece of shit and Kenji. Another cheeky thing that P3 did was that if you wanted to max all arcanas out, you were forced into a fucking harem. It's the biggest meme out of P3's SLs you and I both know it, it sucks, moving on. So, where does P3R take these links. Well, first off they feel the same overall, with some touchups and SOME big changes. The biggest is that for the first time in the series, every single rank is voiced, which I hope becomes the wave moving forward. It adds some depth on the social links here that I love. I think the VAs here were fine, Yong Yea was inoffensive which is all he needs to be, the fat fuck SL (I always forget his name) was goofy enough to find some entertainment out of it. Yuko's VA was great, I thought her SL was fine in the OG, but I like it a bit more now, she brings some character to it. And for the monkey's paw: you aren't forced into a harem with everyone, but at the cost of having the ability to break everyone's hearts in a cruel cruel manner. There's some SL's where you can keep it from prompting, but when you don't and you have to crush their spirit, it feels so fucking mean lmfao. Another thing they do here is add these social events for characters who never had a social link to begin with, like the male SEES members and a character who gets introduced later on. I like the new scenes they added with them a lot. I think they're great. Overall, the good is good and the bad is still bad. It is what it is.

Now the MEAT of the gameplay, fuck all that sissy pussy shit, you're a big man who wants that action, and none of that gay ass fatlus shit. Well, P3's gameplay is infamous, for better or for worse. Tartarus is a long long dungeon, it's always random to make it feel more fresh, but would always kinda blend together. Grindy isn't the word I'd say (to an extent), but tedious is. I'm sorry, but Tartarus is not the most fun thing to me. And the actual combat? Well, Persona 3 does this quirky little thing where you could only choose the action of the protagonist, and no one else. Everyone does their own action. Atlus wanted to emphasize each character's individuality, which I like in that way, but to play through it, ugh I have no fun with it. I get it, it ain't makin me have fun, but I get it. Granted you can kind of dictate it with tactics, but still, just never clicked with me, and probably won't. So, here we are in P3R, and hallelujah, we can control the party. It makes it much more bearable. As for tartarus, well, it's more bearable? I don't hate it? It's less tartarus changing too much, and more some some tweaks, gameplay changes, and some visual changes that make it less of a chore this time around. So, despite the party control changes, not much else is changed, but there are some interesting changes. Remember those little persona moves you could do in the original, like those special attacks with your personas? Well, they come back in the form of "Theurgy". Later in the game, everyone has this gauge that will fill up with certain actions. When filled, the character can do a special move to either buff the party or do a special attack. Theurgy on paper coulda made the game too easy but I think it works. I like it. Oh, right, difficulty. I played P3 on normal way back when, so I played it here, and despite what I just said, P3R is way easier than before. But here's the catch for me: P3 was harder but less fun, but Reload was more fun but much easier. I don't mind difficulty at all, that's not P3's issue, but if an easier time means a more fun time, then I think I'd take that here. Granted, my dumbass should've played on hard, and hard stuff is there, I still think Elizabeth is hard as shit. But some things that were hard aren't here. Play on hard if you've played P3 before.

Ah, the soundtrack. The most consistent good thing about Persona. All these games usually have a nice OST, each having a unique vibe to it. P3 has a nice soundtrack, there's some pop, hip hop, and rock elements to it, and it has this chill vibe. It's a vibe. P3R has some redone tracks here, and they're fine. They brought back Lotus Juice for these tracks too. I like Iwatodai Dorm's redone track a lot, When the Moon's Reaching Out Stars is great, Mass Destruction is a track that is so old to me and it's so boring already (I'm sorry, but vocal battle themes in this series age like milk for me. It's not that they're bad but they got old fast for me.), and here it has a weird quietness to it. It's fine but damn. The redone tracks at the end are fantastic by the way. Memories of You and Burn my Dread, fuuuuck man. As for the new tracks, MWAH. Color Your Night is the chillest fucking track ever, it's so good, and Lotus Juice sings in it too it's great. Full Moon, Full Life is an all-timer. Vanilla P4's intro was my favorite going in, and this one is inching closer to it. I fucking adore it, visually and musically. It's Persona 3, it's a good soundtrack, you and I know it. Nothing much to say.

The jump to the new 3D models is a blessing and a curse. The models look nice themselves, but some of the animations can be weak. Plus, they get over reliant with it at points, taking away from some of the scenes, especially at the end. Some moments loose some weight cuz of it. The style and UI changes are good too, I like the water stuff they got here n all dat. It's fine. As for the portraits, they're fine, but once again, some changes take away some of the charm. There is a certain Yukari portrait from the original that is gone, and wasn't redone, and it's a TRAVESTY. TRAVESTY. These are the brunt of my complaints though, which is a really good thing when you think about it, cuz if stuff as little as that is the majority of my complaints, then you know this remake is legit.

I have to say, it was so nice to jump back into Persona 3 once more with this remake. My love for the games feel rejuvenated, it's so nostalgic and nice to experience this again. I love Persona 3, warts and all, and this remake is so great. So, what version is best. Well, I hate to say it, and I will probably get shit on for it, but if you asked my honest opinion: I think I prefer this one over FES. Now, as I said earlier, play both versions if you can. I think the original Persona 3 is still worth playing (despite issues I have playing it). I think the argument about that is kind of lame, so it's not really worth having. Just play both.

Fuck this game for starting that annoying bathhouse trope in these games god it SUCKS STOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP.