A remake of the original Metroid that looks pretty, sounds mediocre, and controls like an actual video game this time around.

I completed Zero Mission almost on accident; A quick peek at the game for me turned into commiting to a complete run after being surprised at how quickly I had already progressed compared to something like Super Metroid.

Zero Mission, being a Metroid game still does have its crypticisms, but refreshingly feels like a tight experience that doesn't waste too much of your time. Finally! A Metroid that's straight to the point.

Some of this is probably due to the waypoint system, but even that doesn't give the player all the answers. Likely, the scale of the original NES title is just not as daunting when its actually fun to play, and so committing to exploring new chunks of map is an easy pill to swallow. (Not to mention, much more reasonably challenging task.)

Zero Mission's weaker points seem to stem from being a remake - None of the music reaches the heights of Super Metroid, and the NES tracks translated into the GBA's signature crunchy sound is underwhelming at best, and grating at worst. A lot of the game's map also doesn't do a good job at making themselves feel distinguished: You can feel the effort put into the different environment tile sets and music, and there are noble efforts like duct taping new gimmicks in a few pockets of the different zones, but it could have gone further.

The game's stronger points for the most part trended towards being the highlight - New cutscenes and the aforementioned "pocket gimmicks" were all very nice, but the biggest addition to the game was the game's Epilogue.

After making my Zebes escape, my impression of the game was that it was a super tight Metroid experience with some signature cryptic annoyances, but otherwise had excellent presentation and great control, resulting in the best Metroid I had played yet.

The epilogue's presentation is also still on point here and could have been something really special - The first half of the epilogue feels just a tad too gimmicky, and way too trial-and-error for my tastes, but it wouldn't be so bad if the second half's map didn't feel like it was purposefully designed to waste my time and be irritating to traverse through - Which by the end of the game, it clearly is.

So the end product is something that while I think is pretty close to surpassing Super Metroid, it doesn't quite stick the landing on everything it does. If nothing else, Space Jumping in this game isn't a nightmare, so it's a solid enough recommendation.

Horrendously Ugly, Numbingly Simple, Frustratingly Clunky, and Surprisingly Racist - Fable Anniversary with my partner was a blast, for mostly the wrong reasons. Its... Complicated.

Not the game, mind you - For how much Fable attempts to wear its ambitions on its sleeve, a vast majority of its numerous mechanics feel under-baked, unbalanced, and as though they could have been cut or heavily altered without much consequence.

Specifically, while mechanics such as the passage of time, your character's physical appearance being modified by your in-game habits, the entire morality system, and the way you interact with NPCs feel core to the Fable identity, there isn't a single one of those mechanics that hadn't already been done more successfully elsewhere, with some of those games even doing more than one of those at a time. Even though it's is an easy and almost unfair card to play, Star Wars: Knights of The Old Republic's NPC interaction and relationship building and physical appearance-altering morality system was already being praised a whole year before the original Fable's release.

Still, I suppose Shallow Gimmicks That Aren't Implemented All That Well is Fable's thing.
Fans of the franchise will note its charm and sense of whimsy and humor - Fable certainly attempts to be a humorous game, and to its credit it is genuinely funny at times.

BUT

The vast majority of the most hilarious parts of the game are certainly.... Not "unintentional" - that seems to not give proper credit to the game's systems - but Unscripted. Having my character become gradually more attractive or scary and hearing the citizens of Albion isn't very immersive, but it is ridiculously funny. Not being able to visit the local tavern without being bombarded by 8 NPCs all shouting the same 3 voice lines, sometimes in sync with one another, is a riot. The local barber being unable to run away in hysteric fear at max volume but still agreeing to give me one of 6 awful haircuts is a hoot-and-a-half. Accidentally one-shotting a friendly NPC because of the busted ass targeting system immediately causes an eruption of laughter, without fail.

It's awesome.

When the game isn't so absurd-its-entertaining, which is admittedly not very frequent, Fable really shows its colors of being a basic, janky, and butt-ugly RPG experience. Combat isn't particularly fun, nor is it at all balanced or functional. Romancing NPCs is a matter of spamming buttons until you get a black screen with the same awkward line of sex dialogue repeated more than thrice. Exploring the world map is functionally walking down endless forks and hallways bookended by loading screens, and while the levelling up/experience system feels fairly unique, there's a very limited amount of actually-useful applications of what you spend your progression toward.

As a moment-to-moment action video game, there's really not much to Fable. None of the characters or the story is even that complex, interesting, or even competently told. And even on a bigger scope, Fable is a limited amusement park for gimmicks by the bucketful that aren't satisfying on their own. But somehow, against all odds, despite so much of the game being dull and Not Good, the entirety of the experience has been one of my most memorable in recent times. It was almost hypnotic, and I constantly wanted to revisit it when I wasn't playing it, despite easily becoming frustrated, confused, or bored when I was playing it.

I haven't played the Original Xbox version, so I can't really comment on how faithful of a remaster Anniversary is, but a remaster of an original Xbox title on the Xbox 360 in 2014 - The Xbox One's sophomore year - is boggling, and the results don't really justify its existence either. Fable Anniversary is not only hands down one of the ugliest games I've ever played, but it also runs awfully, and is filled with technical problems. Whether these latter 2 qualities are retained from the original or not is irrelevant to me. They stink. Even if i can adjust to the nauseating art style, the performance and bugs can make Fable Anniversary a chore to play, saying nothing of the actual game design.

Lastly, the one other unforgivable, un-adjustable fault of the game is it's so blatantly racist attitudes and themes. These are so obvious to me, that I'm genuinely bewildered at the lack of discussion around it. Having maximum "good" morality results in your character having white skin, blond hair, and blue eyes, while having maximum "evil" morality results in the character having cracked black skin.

Typical morality-driven colorism aside, the base game's 3 non-white character consist of 2 rival characters that you spend the entire game proving your superiority over, while the 3rd is a stereotypically labeled "exotic" sex worker.

Less than uh, stellar representation. Even in 2004.

Fable's thematic focus on a heavily heteronormative, white male hero power fantasy might not make this very surprising for some, and it's certainly not the only area that Fable has not aged well in, it sticks out like a sore thumb and is incredibly unwelcome.

All in all, Fable is very much Not Great, but it is entertaining and intriguing just enough to have me wanting to check out the next 2 mainline games.

Certainly one takeaway I have is that Playground Game's upcoming Fable reboot has its work cut out for them, and surpassing on the original's ideas and themes should be no sweat for the Forza Horizon veterans.

Gears Tactics is another product of the western tactical RPG renaissance, offering some intriguing twists on the XCOM template, though the Gears wrapper almost lets it down.

The core gameplay is satisfying, which is unsurprising, and feels like an incredibly faithful adaptation of the mechanics of the primary 3rd person shooter franchise - Audio barks and sound design cues are all very familiar feeling, and Gears Tactic's expanded and flexible action economy makes stringing together combos to elongate your turns uniquely satisfying in the genre while also recalling the pace of ducking in and out of cover from other titles in the franchise.

Gears Tactics also offers a lot of progression and customization when compared to its XCOM roots, which is always welcome, but the amount you might appreciate these options might rely on how invested you are in the world and aesthetic of Gears of War to begin with. Even as a casual Gears of War fan who has a solid admiration of Gears of War 3 and Gears 5, there's nothing that Tactics brings to the table story or atmosphere-wise to keep me interested in completing a campaign. None of the story or the main cast of characters are very compelling, which is probably fine for Gears, but they also lack any tacky charm on the surface.

The audio and visuals are top notch, but there's no thematic intrigue to keep me on my toes - No fear of the unknown, no attachment to my troops or tension of losing them, no urgency to keep me constantly thinking multiple missions ahead.

In a sentence, It's all "XCOM", and no "Enemy Unknown".

XCOM 2's combat is just as solid as before, but its sloppy and irritating tutorials that persist across the game's clunkier-than-ever grand strategy elements make it feel like a step or two back from its predecessor.

XCOM 2 is also aesthetically uninteresting - Gone is the campy layer of that classic, retro-futuristic UFO science fiction flavor in the game's most prominent alien footsoldiers, and in place are large swaths of generic Gamer-PC looking foes that may as well not be alien at all.

The sum of XCOM 2's parts is an unfocused mess, carried by elements that don't feel dramatically improved upon from it's predecessor. The big question: Why play XCOM 2 over XCOM 1?

Marathon offers some neat atmosphere, and was notable for being one of the first few shooters (alongside System Shock) to include mouselook aiming.

Aside from that, there's nothing about Marathon that has aged particularly well, nor is it particularly worth visiting in modern times outside of a curious look into the roots of Halo and Bungie's history with first person shooters.

Nothing about the enemies or weapons is exciting, the level design is unengaging, and the controls have somehow aged awkwardly.

Unfortunately, Marathon is just another one of those weird niche shooters that doesn't have the modern luxury of an excellent source port.

Sea of Thieves is a delightful pirate playground that's immersive and ripe for emergent player-driven stories.

Player experience will vary extremely from an individual to another - Each ingredient is fairly straightforward on its own, but thrive vividly when combined in numerous combinations. At the base level, Sea of Thieves is endless busy-work without much in the way of game-modifying progression, and so relies heavily on the fun of happenstance on any given session.

The game actually does a very good job of invisibly guiding these happenstances quite often in crews of 3 or 4, but may be more inconsistent with lower player counts. Player interaction woven with seemingly random events, and finding bonus treats or breadcrumb trails along the way layered on top of the base voyages you and your crew set sail on form the entirety of Sea of Thieve's constantly unfurling gameplay loop, and there's not much quite like it on the market today.

I also find the lack of vertical progression to be a boon - Its refreshing when compared to other games on the market, and also makes Sea of Thieves a game that's never daunting to return back to from a hiatus, never a need to "catch up" with established friends or foes who have played since launch. Perfect for yearly revisits.

Sea of Thieves gives you all the pieces for a thrilling and flavorful contained sandbox every time you play.