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Welcome to Smarty Pants folks! This ones gonna be a doozie! Didnt play the VN... I got the experience well enough from the anime! Lets just say not even the double points dance could save this atrocity because 0 x 2.5 is still ZERO. Just like the amount of braincells you will have by the end of watching or playing this corny dogshit mess of a series. Coincidentally idiot dumbass smooth brained Shitrou also has no braincells! Hes so mentally challenged i bet he couldnt even get a question "CORRECT!" in the "GAMES!" category something even a madman could do! Well at least they were consistent with something! If this criticism seems harsh "SORRY!" Not really though. Fate Stay Night is "TOO BAD!" to write anything really meaningful to it. But ill try my best to summarize this shitshow I will "NARROW IT DOWN!" to dumbass shounen boy who sucks at everything to do in the show but his personality is watered down to: i help people i protect gurl when im an incompetence jackass! Oh he helps people because of survivers guilt? And it shows that his ideal of saving everyone as horribly idiotic makes him a hypocrite? "RIGHTY-OH!" But if his dream is wrong then why is the series making it out that hes right? How did he even get survivers guilt if a fucking building fell on him? Whats he gonna do if hes stronger? Fight buildings and fire? Shitrou is repeatedly idiotic and mentally challenged yet stumbles into solutions all the same! This is the person who beats Gilgamesh the most powerful warrior but also says the line: people die when they are killed? He beats archer because he says his idiotic ideal is right when he has no actual experience fighting and that he is proven to be wrong because archer is him from the future who suffered through his shitty ideal thus Shitrou always was wrong from the start but he still wins? Because just because hes right doesnt mean hes correct? "NOPE!" What kind of dumbshit is that?! After he was always wrong due to being so fucking stupid at the end when he beats beats archer and continues down a path that garentees failure madness and death he says he will do it anyways just maybe a bit less... WHAT THE FUCK How does anyone get any sort of "ENTERTAINMENT!" from this garbage!
Also the harem garbage where he can fall in love with his bland sword girl because: Saber isnt allowed to fight! SHE GIRL I DUN WANNA SEE HER GET HURT! Yet doesnt give 2 shits about the majority of male characters they cant even make this dipshit consistent because THATS TOO HARD! Look at how he treats Iliya the little dipshit who tries to kill them! Shitrou is just fine with her at the end of it but Shinji is bad because hes a asshole? This is barely about his fuck ass ideals its about waifus and "I KNOW IT!" Also the other choices Tsundere dipshit who looks smart but is actually almost as fucking stupid as Shitrou just looking smarter while next to him. Last we have some weird girl who says senpai repeatedly and Shirou is so mentally challenged for loving her because SHE TRIES TO KILL HIM IN THIS ROUTE!
All of that and funny enough the only way Shitrous idiotic ideal would work is if they did a "SWITCHAROO!" and made his character arc a tragedy instead forcing stupidity to be the winning choice just to have the protagonist succeed and get a girlfriend at the end even when he is proven wrong. FUCK SHITROU EMIYUCK "YOU ARE (not) THE SMARTY PANTS!"
Now with the negatives out of the way here are the positives for this Smarty Pants review: There are bad end paths were Shitrou dies! "Niiiiiiice!" But you can tell the creator doesnt read too many "BOOKS!" Because any series were that insufferable turd dies is a good ending! Regardless because of it the rating is one star instead of half a star.
Welcome to Smarty Pants!
As soon as I turned on this game i was enthralled in complete euphoria. As soon as i here the words "Welcome to Smarty Pants!" nothing else matters anymore I've made it to a perfect heavenly utopia..
The way the announcers says incredible iconic lines such as "Sorry!", "Righty oh!" "Spin the wheel!" "Uh-oh you're in jail!" and the best one "Do the double points dance!" Is the greatest voice acting I've seen since Rex in Xenoblade 2
The game has incredible features such as being able to choose your very own creatable miis as playable characters a never before seen addition for a wii game! Im always itching to use my favorite mii Weezerfan! You can also choose your age but if you choose a younger age the questions are very easy and an older age as harder ones! Such an immaculate difficulty slider Dark Souls wishes it had as no one can ever attempt to abuse it its just perfect! You start a turn by spinning the wheel which when its slowing down can let you pick what category and bonus you want anyways making the wheel that much more fun! Thus always guarantees a double points dance! Others can also mess with the spin but why would they miss out on the trance inducing spectacle of the glorious double points dance!? There's also other bonuses such as the "That's too hard" Card the "That's too easy" card and the "Switcharoo" card which all give you an edge to outwit your opponents but mostly are there just to hear another iconic line from the iconic narrator as he explains the cards function for the 1000th time! Such brilliant design!
Other mechanics include your mii doing an amazing pelvic thrust dance every time they are in the lead and you going to jail for answering too quickly. They really have such a realistic depiction of the USA justice system so adults can enjoy this absolute treasure.
The presentation is just so inspiring! The music is so iconic the main theme of Smarty Pants has finally dethroned the best song in the world Demondice Wa by DEMONDICE as the most listened song on Spotify, Apple Music, and Amazon Music! So Sublime! The Smarty Pants Mascot is also just so appealing! Hes a lightbulb as its a game about being smart and bright means smart! Jaw dropping writing that could make Neil Druckmann blush and magnificent character design that rivals that of the cast Typical Colors 2 from Roblox!
Lastly the best part of this godlike creation of a video game: The double points dance. Nothing compares to this game design of this caliber. This utter jubilation of expression in one perfect moment of exhilarating bliss for 2.5x points makes this game paradise YOU MUST DO THE DANCE it will TOTALLY LIKE TOTALLY never work if you just spin the the wii remote from the wrist strap like other terrible wii games IM LOOKING AT YOU MARIO GALAXY!! It PERFECTLY syncs up to your movements knowing how well you can actually perform this legendary dance and rewards you with a miracle Jesus himself couldn't replicate... 2.5x points!!!
Never have I've experienced this ecstasy of perfection in any other medium EA has truly outdone themselves. I now await the long awaited sequel Smarty Pants 2 to grace me with its benevolence as I watch only the EA conference at E3 every year desperately awaiting my savior. Surely this year is the one though until then... I say Welcome to Smarty Pants!