Foundational Video Games for My Identity

This just covers the games that have had a massive impact of the sort of person I am today. I'll get really personal with every entry, so if you don't wanna read a 21 going to 22 year old loser's personal stuff (especially about the 200th time he reflects on a recent relationship that was kind of really toxic!), u can air!

Persona 3 FES
Persona 3 FES
Persona 3 helped me understand just how much my friends meant to me at the time of first playing the game and gave me hope for the future, it impacted how I viewed my friends and how much I really cared about those around me even though I was a bit shut off about it.
Which made things complicated for me given the fact in my previous relationship I was more than certain I was going to have to abandon said friends for a relationship that mattered the world to me at the time because of the judgment and expectations of my partner at the time.
And then time went on and a lot of the struggles of the characters started hitting a bit harder for me, but then that last relationship which lasted 5 years going to 6 ended (in a chaotic out of nowhere way which I had no control over) and then...
Mitsuru's entire character became someone I related to and understood more and more. The struggle of projecting an image of perfection for someone else and living your life for them rather than yourself was something that hit real hard for me the more I thought about it.
It is something I think about a lot still, but I think the message of living life for yourself and living life by your own terms rather than the terms of others is what really hit for me. Mitsuru learning to live for her sake and making her own value in life kinda just... Sticks hard for me and in so many ways she felt like a character made for me personally as a way to understand myself, and her entire character has impacted my outlook on everything in my life as I've gone forwards.
It's never worth living a life for someone else. Never.
Persona 5 Royal
Persona 5 Royal
if dis didnt exist i would be single rn i think.
Joking asides (I do kinda owe this game for helping my current girlfriend with a bunch of aspects in her life,) this game's final arc did play a massive role in helping me become more empathetic and helped me become a better support system to those closest to me. In a more recent play though, it helped tide me over during the aforementioned break up I had and it along with talking with my (not at the time) girlfriend about my own struggles with the breakup was the final push that caused the ball in my life to roll and make me really move on.
i love u adele <3
5 years of our friendship blossoming into this relationship is peak. :)
Pathologic 2
Pathologic 2
This game had a profound impact on how I viewed religion at the time of playing the game and muddied my feelings regarding Islam when I still followed it, it's far from an "anti-religious" game, but it put into perspective my feelings about religion (Abrahamic at least) and how it created conflict with my own personal moral code.
It's not a work that I think would impact many others religious beliefs like it impacted mine (the game is very much not pro or anti religion, it just asks a question in where religion plays a part of it), but the moment I realize I might be bisexual, huh... the feelings this game made me feel about religion in general, kinda made it easier to accept that I wasn't much of a Muslim anymore and that I am just agnostic.
Definitely wanna clarify I feel like this is a personal reading of how the game impacted me rather than the game being about how religion is bad or whatever, because like... It's very much NOT about it and it more just explores a lot of the complicated things religion brings and moral conundrums which hit me in the place to think about it a lot.
Fallout: New Vegas - Ultimate Edition
Fallout: New Vegas - Ultimate Edition
This game saved my life and is my comfort game, I also think it led to me growing up a bit more open minded since I played it in early HS and it, along with a bunch of other things, gradually made me a pretty open person.
It's probably the game on this list which has impacted me the longest (again I played this shit in freshman year of HS back when I was like 14-15) so it's just... hard to really get really detailed about it.
The Silver Case
The Silver Case
This is a stand in for the entire "Kill the Past" catalogue. I'll go through every entry that had a real significant impact on my personhood.
- The Silver Case.
The way the Silver Case reflected on relationships in Placebo, the stressful monotony of trying to make progress in the confines of your room, and the sense of aimlessness it presented hits a lot of notes for me as a person and Tokio's journey through a lot of the game felt relatable and real to me and was kind of the unexpected primer of the falling out I had with my previous relationship.
Regardless, the biggest thing that stuck out to me, and impacted me when playing though was how the game in its later half in both Placebo and Transmitter, managed to explore the underlying feeling of not being "good enough" or "worth the effort" in a way which hit my insecurities in the perfect way to make me think about them a lot. I'll keep it real and say I still have to deal with this issue, even in a healthy relationship I still have a bunch of self worth issues that just... aren't great, but needless to say The Silver Case did at least open myself up into actively thinking about this stuff in a clearer mind and has played a part in me actively trying to get better with the issue.
Definitely feel like Placebo's story felt like the "right game at the right time" situation, definitely have a bunch of love for this game.
(Every time Tokio talked with Erika on the swing set while Apricot Square played I said he's just like me fr.)
- The 25th Ward.
given I played this game only a few months after a breakup, I can tell you that the fact this game is the strongest representation of the mantra of the "Kill The Past" games kinda uh, had an entire different meaning for me that made me confront a bunch and recontextualized how I viewed everything.
Placebo and Matchmaker both had impactful takes regarding the mantra which really hit on a personal level. Especially regarding Placebo and how the original ending's thesis of "it's worth getting rid of the parts of the past you really value for the positive impact it can have on the world" (referencing a certain scene a turtle) kinda really hit an important note for me to grow a lotttttttttttttttttttt.
I also really resonated with how Tsuki throughout matchmaker has to confront his past and how the story explores that and Osato's entire role in Tsuki's journey with his past. All I gotta say is Tsuki GOAT.
- Killer7
I used this shit for a few essays to talk about in college, I am so fucking awesome and Sudapilled!
Joking asides (I mean I did use it for a few essays before,) the game's take on individuality and the value of understanding yourself and your personal struggles before trying to tackle the larger societal issues kinda has played a massive role in impacting how I've approached the world and how I've been putting a lot more value in trying to get myself.
Still don't fully get me but hey maybe in like... 15 more years I can get myself fr. Still though, Killer7 has played a massive role in my value of being an individual and appreciating the small scale stuff of life and it's just great. :D
and fr i'm just like dan smith fr...
Guilty Gear: Strive
Guilty Gear: Strive
Played quite a massive part in my personal self discovery journey in life... kinda insane given how dis a fighting game whose story I don't know shit about, but yeah helped me realize a lot about me... lole...
NieR Replicant ver.1.22474487139...
NieR Replicant ver.1.22474487139...
Same stuff as Strive.
Yakuza 5
Yakuza 5
Yakuza 5 Kiryu changed me


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