rapid_progres
2023
This game made me feel like a fucking dumbass.
That's how you know it's a good puzzle game.
That's how you know it's a good puzzle game.
1993
Not many games out there where the plot is so cracked out that the localization threw it out and made up a new one.
Also not many games where out of a selection of 4 weapons and 16 unique combinations, the most powerful attack in the game is your co-op partner's face.
ALSO not many games where Expert mode gives you a 7 phase boss fight with attacks you never saw in any of the lower difficulties. One of said phases being it morphing into a giant fucking pistol.
ALSO not many games where a miniboss you fought earlier escapes into deep space so that it could re-challenge you with a bullet hell survival challenge that can last up to 1 hour and 30 minutes.
The developers just did whatever the fuck they wanted and it shows. Every design decision in this game, regardless of whether it was fully realized or not, had the boldness to try. And I think it succeeded in every regard, because even when it makes no goddamn sense, it's just fun.
Treasure games are something else.
(Also, did you know there's a secret slide tackle attack? Input ⬅️↙️⬇️↘️➡️ + B and it'll push away / tear through most enemies. Does more damage than the regular slide, and it's really important to learn if you want to stand a chance in the harder difficulties.)
Also not many games where out of a selection of 4 weapons and 16 unique combinations, the most powerful attack in the game is your co-op partner's face.
ALSO not many games where Expert mode gives you a 7 phase boss fight with attacks you never saw in any of the lower difficulties. One of said phases being it morphing into a giant fucking pistol.
ALSO not many games where a miniboss you fought earlier escapes into deep space so that it could re-challenge you with a bullet hell survival challenge that can last up to 1 hour and 30 minutes.
The developers just did whatever the fuck they wanted and it shows. Every design decision in this game, regardless of whether it was fully realized or not, had the boldness to try. And I think it succeeded in every regard, because even when it makes no goddamn sense, it's just fun.
Treasure games are something else.
(Also, did you know there's a secret slide tackle attack? Input ⬅️↙️⬇️↘️➡️ + B and it'll push away / tear through most enemies. Does more damage than the regular slide, and it's really important to learn if you want to stand a chance in the harder difficulties.)
Your reward for completing the game is being able to play as EVERY character in it! Including the bosses and minor enemies!
10/10 for that ALONE, who gives a fuck if it has flaws. It had BALLS.
10/10 for that ALONE, who gives a fuck if it has flaws. It had BALLS.
It's weird. I remembered this being way harder than it actually is, and I feel like a lot of that was due to my only real memory of the game being its shitty and tedious final boss.
The level design doesn't really do anything too new or interesting, and because very little of it stands out, all you're left to remember it by is some irritatingly placed enemies who all just so happen to be standing in the worst spots imaginable. I can appreciate that they tried to vary up the stages in comparison to Rondo of Blood with more verticality, more stairs, and more moving platforms... but it doesn't DO anything with these gimmicks. It's all just different types of moving platforms. Sometimes they're sideways, sometimes they're up and down; if a stage's got some platforms, it's 50/50 whether it moves. It's a shame, because I can see they wanted to make something more in line with the NES entries, but it's just not very creative. Not that it would matter if it was, because very large chunks of the levels can just be skipped with backflips!
A lot of the enemy types are reused from Rondo, but there's not really a lot to go around- it seems like they just took what they knew would be general-purpose and left it at that. A lot of the more interesting / challenging enemies were omitted from this game, so you're really just encountering the same Axe Armors, crows, and whatever the lance dudes were called over and over again. They're not an issue with proper spacing... and since you see them so much, you'll figure out what that was and not need to put much, if any, thought into it at all.
It kind of stings that so many of the cooler types of enemies are absent, since that game had more of a combat focus- Richter has all the same abilities here, but no real need to apply any of it since nothing difficult enough to justify it shows up. The bosses aren't anywhere near as capable as they were in Rondo either, so it's an utter curbstomp once you get to them.... and it's honestly really easy to put yourself on autopilot, walk forward, and whip them to death. I'm still reeling over how I stunlocked the minotaur boss. By accident.
I don't know. It's got some snazzy new backgrounds, the sound design is satisfyingly punchy, and the soundtrack is filled with some pretty faithful recreations of Rondo's soundtrack (Bloodlines in particular might even be an improvement over the original track!), but I left the game feeling underwhelmed by how much shorter and easier the package as a whole was. Especially compared to everything that came before it at the time...
Also, is it just me, or does Richter's walking animation feel like it's too fast? Boy you are NOT running what's going on
The level design doesn't really do anything too new or interesting, and because very little of it stands out, all you're left to remember it by is some irritatingly placed enemies who all just so happen to be standing in the worst spots imaginable. I can appreciate that they tried to vary up the stages in comparison to Rondo of Blood with more verticality, more stairs, and more moving platforms... but it doesn't DO anything with these gimmicks. It's all just different types of moving platforms. Sometimes they're sideways, sometimes they're up and down; if a stage's got some platforms, it's 50/50 whether it moves. It's a shame, because I can see they wanted to make something more in line with the NES entries, but it's just not very creative. Not that it would matter if it was, because very large chunks of the levels can just be skipped with backflips!
A lot of the enemy types are reused from Rondo, but there's not really a lot to go around- it seems like they just took what they knew would be general-purpose and left it at that. A lot of the more interesting / challenging enemies were omitted from this game, so you're really just encountering the same Axe Armors, crows, and whatever the lance dudes were called over and over again. They're not an issue with proper spacing... and since you see them so much, you'll figure out what that was and not need to put much, if any, thought into it at all.
It kind of stings that so many of the cooler types of enemies are absent, since that game had more of a combat focus- Richter has all the same abilities here, but no real need to apply any of it since nothing difficult enough to justify it shows up. The bosses aren't anywhere near as capable as they were in Rondo either, so it's an utter curbstomp once you get to them.... and it's honestly really easy to put yourself on autopilot, walk forward, and whip them to death. I'm still reeling over how I stunlocked the minotaur boss. By accident.
I don't know. It's got some snazzy new backgrounds, the sound design is satisfyingly punchy, and the soundtrack is filled with some pretty faithful recreations of Rondo's soundtrack (Bloodlines in particular might even be an improvement over the original track!), but I left the game feeling underwhelmed by how much shorter and easier the package as a whole was. Especially compared to everything that came before it at the time...
Also, is it just me, or does Richter's walking animation feel like it's too fast? Boy you are NOT running what's going on
2001
One star for every enemy type
2023
I used the chain to latch onto a boss then comboed Flying Strike into Cycle Kick into Heavenly Piledriver and that shit actually fucking worked
God damn
10/10
God damn
10/10
2006
Really kinda fucked up that the PS3's launch title racing game looks and plays better than the majority of racers that came after it, huh?
Plug a 6 button controller into port 1, and have any controller plugged into port 2. Before you do anything, highlight Options.
Hold down Mode on controller 1, then Up and C on controller 2. Keep all these buttons held and enter the options menu with Start on controller 1.
If the menu says "OPTION" and not "OPTIONS", you did it right. You've activated 6 button mode, and you no longer have to get the spacing down to attack your enemies with melee attacks. You can just do it by pressing B, because shurikens are mapped to Y and Z.
You're welcome.
Hold down Mode on controller 1, then Up and C on controller 2. Keep all these buttons held and enter the options menu with Start on controller 1.
If the menu says "OPTION" and not "OPTIONS", you did it right. You've activated 6 button mode, and you no longer have to get the spacing down to attack your enemies with melee attacks. You can just do it by pressing B, because shurikens are mapped to Y and Z.
You're welcome.
2013
There was a guy named Marik Ishtar who specifically requested a trade with me in the middle of my playthrough. I had a lot of good 'mons transferred from the older games, so I thought I'd give him something nice.
He flashed a shiny Genesect, so I tried to give him something of equal value, but he rejected the trade. I couldn't figure out if there was anything specific he wanted, so I just quickly ran through 3 of my best pokemon and got them all rejected before realizing he was fucking with me.
I backed out and saw that his profile said "suck my d!ck", then he requested four more trades with me that I had to keep declining. He kept interrupting cutscenes.
Because of him, I give this game an extra star, because that is the closest thing to difficulty I experienced in the entire run.
He flashed a shiny Genesect, so I tried to give him something of equal value, but he rejected the trade. I couldn't figure out if there was anything specific he wanted, so I just quickly ran through 3 of my best pokemon and got them all rejected before realizing he was fucking with me.
I backed out and saw that his profile said "suck my d!ck", then he requested four more trades with me that I had to keep declining. He kept interrupting cutscenes.
Because of him, I give this game an extra star, because that is the closest thing to difficulty I experienced in the entire run.
They put Rugal back in, so I can satisfy my lizard brain with mashed out Genocide Cutters
I don't even care if I whiff it from fullscreen distance, I'm just going to do it again until you get hit by it
I don't even care if I whiff it from fullscreen distance, I'm just going to do it again until you get hit by it
This was actually my introduction to KOF. I swear, I liked it way more when I had no idea what the rest of the series entailed; if I did not have that perspective, this would probably be a higher rating.
The names were confusing to me, not having followed any of the entries until very late; I interpreted it kind of like a sports game type deal where they're all basically the same thing but with a few fighters added every year. I didn't know there were multiple arcs worth of story and gigantic mechanical changes along with characters literally getting killed off and being unable to participate in the next.
So.... now that I know that, and I've actually played the rest? This game's kinda bunk in comparison. The backgrounds and music are very drab compared to the previous games (although at LEAST a step up from 2001 and 2002) and the tag mechanics are half-baked. Matches feel like they go by WAY too quickly, and the sound design feels a lot less.... punchy than every game predating it. I'm also VERY not okay with how they got rid of C+D attacks- with only four buttons, removing an entire extra dimension of offense just makes the game feel stripped down. Tagging doesn't add anything of meaningful value to change up fights to make up for that omission, so it just makes every character feel like they can do less...
It really is a shame, because I wanna like this more than I do. Every newcomer is fucking awesome! The new arc felt more immediately gripping to me than NESTS did! The roster has a lot of unexpected newcomers and returning characters that SOUND like they should be great! All the voice acting is incredible too!
But it's just..... I dunno..... alright. Not great. Not bad. It's alright.
Anyway there's this dangerously 2000s combo video I had saved and I just think you all should see it.
The names were confusing to me, not having followed any of the entries until very late; I interpreted it kind of like a sports game type deal where they're all basically the same thing but with a few fighters added every year. I didn't know there were multiple arcs worth of story and gigantic mechanical changes along with characters literally getting killed off and being unable to participate in the next.
So.... now that I know that, and I've actually played the rest? This game's kinda bunk in comparison. The backgrounds and music are very drab compared to the previous games (although at LEAST a step up from 2001 and 2002) and the tag mechanics are half-baked. Matches feel like they go by WAY too quickly, and the sound design feels a lot less.... punchy than every game predating it. I'm also VERY not okay with how they got rid of C+D attacks- with only four buttons, removing an entire extra dimension of offense just makes the game feel stripped down. Tagging doesn't add anything of meaningful value to change up fights to make up for that omission, so it just makes every character feel like they can do less...
It really is a shame, because I wanna like this more than I do. Every newcomer is fucking awesome! The new arc felt more immediately gripping to me than NESTS did! The roster has a lot of unexpected newcomers and returning characters that SOUND like they should be great! All the voice acting is incredible too!
But it's just..... I dunno..... alright. Not great. Not bad. It's alright.
Anyway there's this dangerously 2000s combo video I had saved and I just think you all should see it.
1991
The Sega Genesis is my favorite console. There was a point in time where I downloaded a full romset, filtered out games I recognized, and put a timer to try every game out for at least 20 minutes. Any highlights would go onto my flashcart after the fact.
This game filled me with hope. I really liked the intro; the character animation and design is right up my alley. I was so stoked!
I reset the emulator, went through the intro a second time, recorded it to send to my friends, and said something like "Have you ever instantly fell in love?"
Then I played the game.
I stopped the timer at four minutes.
I left with such a bitter taste in my mouth that I didn't play any Genesis games... or videogames at all, for the next three days.
I don't think I've ever been more disappointed in a videogame in my entire life. If the intro just fucking sucked out of the gate, it would've at least been funny.
This just made me sad.
This game filled me with hope. I really liked the intro; the character animation and design is right up my alley. I was so stoked!
I reset the emulator, went through the intro a second time, recorded it to send to my friends, and said something like "Have you ever instantly fell in love?"
Then I played the game.
I stopped the timer at four minutes.
I left with such a bitter taste in my mouth that I didn't play any Genesis games... or videogames at all, for the next three days.
I don't think I've ever been more disappointed in a videogame in my entire life. If the intro just fucking sucked out of the gate, it would've at least been funny.
This just made me sad.
2021
I didn't play this game but Balan is a peak character design
1995
Justice of Galaxy started playing.
The music had a moment- a dramatic sting. In perfect sync with this, the game introduces an enemy type you've never seen before in droves.
All 6 of them begin moving and shooting at the precise second the track kicks in. The rest of the stage never lets up after this.
I haven't beaten this game. I don't know if I'm going to be able to anytime soon. But things like that are what earns 10/10s from me; the understanding that the visuals and audio can be just as important to a game as its mechanics, and just as impactful if used correctly. The impression was definitely made, and now I'm committed to seeing it through.
This game wipes the floor with my ass and I keep coming back just because of that. I don't even care if the background is the same for the whole thing. It's good. And free!
The music had a moment- a dramatic sting. In perfect sync with this, the game introduces an enemy type you've never seen before in droves.
All 6 of them begin moving and shooting at the precise second the track kicks in. The rest of the stage never lets up after this.
I haven't beaten this game. I don't know if I'm going to be able to anytime soon. But things like that are what earns 10/10s from me; the understanding that the visuals and audio can be just as important to a game as its mechanics, and just as impactful if used correctly. The impression was definitely made, and now I'm committed to seeing it through.
This game wipes the floor with my ass and I keep coming back just because of that. I don't even care if the background is the same for the whole thing. It's good. And free!
2018
It was alright. I liked the mechanics quite a bit, enjoyed the tunes, and felt that the level design was strong (Chapter 5 in particular easily being my favorite), but the story just wasn't doing it for me.
I'm sure there's an audience for it. I can see the merit and value of something like this, but I wasn't really a fan of how bluntly heavy-handed its theme was. It felt to me like the theme was written first, and the story was shaped around justifying it. And I dunno, I'm just saying- I wouldn't be anywhere near this insecure if I had a sick as hell 8-way airdash that turned my hair blue.
Humble publisher name though. I enjoyed my time.
I'm sure there's an audience for it. I can see the merit and value of something like this, but I wasn't really a fan of how bluntly heavy-handed its theme was. It felt to me like the theme was written first, and the story was shaped around justifying it. And I dunno, I'm just saying- I wouldn't be anywhere near this insecure if I had a sick as hell 8-way airdash that turned my hair blue.
Humble publisher name though. I enjoyed my time.