I guess it's just some masochistic enjoyment of mine. Stockholme syndrome? if you please. BUT IT'S SO DAMN BAD IT'SA MASTERPIECE.
I played about 4 times already, and I will always recommend it to all of my friends as the best novel I played. I really love it, from the bottom of my heart and I am grateful to the universe that I live in the same timeline. Just... let go off your sanity. And enjoy.