Decent Garrett representation, although it’s ugh, spelled wrong! Guys, it’s with two R’s and two T’s. “Garet,” for crying out loud. “Hello, my name is Garet, and these are my friends ‘Mikel’ and ‘Bilee.’” You see, it sucks when I do it to your name, doesn’t it? Garet, sheesh. It doesn’t even compute for my phone, even my keyboard is trying to autocorrect it to “Harry.” I know, Tim Apple, how do you think I feel about it? Oh god, what if they pronounce it in some weird way, some stupid high-fantasy inflection? Oh no, oh dear me, oh my word, oh fuck ass and shit, even. I hope there’s no voice acting in the DS sequel, if I hear one of them call out to Gah-rotte or some shit I just don’t think I could bear it. All that aside, I do like that the Garet here is a major himbo.
What’s that, the game? Oh, it’s pretty good! I love the little react faces they give to the characters whenever they are angry, sad, happy, etc. It’s maybe not as good as Mario pantomiming dialogue while transforming into other characters in Super Mario RPG, but it’s close! At the very least it shows that someone understood the limitations of a cute SD top-down JRPG and then did something about it. How do we convey the party’s disappointment at this series of unfortunate events? Give them dialogue bubbles with cute frowny faces.
Also the fighting system is uh, something. I’d call it neat if I were in a good mood, and goddam deranged if I wasn’t. You get a handful of pokemon who give you super spells, except when you use them your stats and available normal spells go down temporarily, which sucks except the pokemon spells and super summons are strong enough to knock out the bosses in one or two turns, except when maybe it might be better to use your normal stats and spells? It’s also totally playable if you assign the Pokémons to the matching character by element, but if you mix and match elements they create thousands of permutations of different character classes which take years of scholarship to master. I don’t get it, and I just got done playing it. I’m the Argentinian calculating weird math lady meme right now.
It also has one of the silliest bad endings I’ve seen since “attack lavos at level one” in chrono trigger. You can literally refuse the Joseph Campbell call to adventure, which will earn you a screen that says “and then the world ended. Try again, dummy!” People complain about the Dragon Quest series asking the player questions that force you to answer yes, and I respond, what’s the alternative, shit like this?
Aside from that, it has a story that I’d call “a smidge better than Secret of Mana,” which, as a known JRPG liker, is really all I’m asking for when I boot up one of these things. Not to mention I’d also call it “only half done.” Coincidentally the second one just came out for switch online, I just might give it a spin on there
Update: I’m being told that there is indeed no voice acting in the DS golden sun, and that the Garet in that one also has an excellent dad mustache
What’s that, the game? Oh, it’s pretty good! I love the little react faces they give to the characters whenever they are angry, sad, happy, etc. It’s maybe not as good as Mario pantomiming dialogue while transforming into other characters in Super Mario RPG, but it’s close! At the very least it shows that someone understood the limitations of a cute SD top-down JRPG and then did something about it. How do we convey the party’s disappointment at this series of unfortunate events? Give them dialogue bubbles with cute frowny faces.
Also the fighting system is uh, something. I’d call it neat if I were in a good mood, and goddam deranged if I wasn’t. You get a handful of pokemon who give you super spells, except when you use them your stats and available normal spells go down temporarily, which sucks except the pokemon spells and super summons are strong enough to knock out the bosses in one or two turns, except when maybe it might be better to use your normal stats and spells? It’s also totally playable if you assign the Pokémons to the matching character by element, but if you mix and match elements they create thousands of permutations of different character classes which take years of scholarship to master. I don’t get it, and I just got done playing it. I’m the Argentinian calculating weird math lady meme right now.
It also has one of the silliest bad endings I’ve seen since “attack lavos at level one” in chrono trigger. You can literally refuse the Joseph Campbell call to adventure, which will earn you a screen that says “and then the world ended. Try again, dummy!” People complain about the Dragon Quest series asking the player questions that force you to answer yes, and I respond, what’s the alternative, shit like this?
Aside from that, it has a story that I’d call “a smidge better than Secret of Mana,” which, as a known JRPG liker, is really all I’m asking for when I boot up one of these things. Not to mention I’d also call it “only half done.” Coincidentally the second one just came out for switch online, I just might give it a spin on there
Update: I’m being told that there is indeed no voice acting in the DS golden sun, and that the Garet in that one also has an excellent dad mustache