Kuso gamer! You've save-stated so much in the Mesen scene; oh, what's becoming of me…~ Like 'ol R-Type, you can feel Irem's getting really mean. Why is this game such a fiend? It's not unbeatable, theoretically—just a very frustrating feat to accomplish without save states. I wouldn't have beaten this in under a month otherwise, and part of me wonders if the final 1/3 was ever fully tested, start to finish, under normal play conditions. Something of a circular debate looms around Holy Diver today, where some about how hardcore it is while others lament its impenetrable difficulty. Slot me into the camp that laments all the potential squandered in this title, a casualty of the developer's focus on similarly brutal (but more fair) arcade releases.
Completed for the Backloggd Discord server’s Game of the Week club, Feb. 21 - 27, 2023
Let's start with how this game ostensibly recreates Dio's famous album in action game form. I wish it had, but we're stuck with a lightly dressed-up imitation of better-known games, from Castlevania to Mega Man and beyond. Recontextualizing this non-committal attempt to iterate on other, better Famicom staples via a heavy metal coat of paint isn't the worst idea. Too bad this just doesn't evoke anything specifically like the musical influences it takes from. Where are the tigers?! The rainbows in the dark? Or anything beyond what the opening crawl exposits? I love the idea of saving the King Crimson family name just as much as anyone should, but here they've just slapped these references atop an otherwise workmanlike dark fantasy side-scroller. Compare this with the studio's old arcade dev chief, Tetsuo Nakano, asserting how you shouldn't "just set out to imitate someone else, for instance, you’ll always be behind the times".
I'll be fair and also criticize SEGA's Jewel Master for appropriating progressive rock and metal inspirations around the same time. There's a key difference, however: the Mega Drive game actually has a fitting prog soundtrack. Rarely do I start digging into a non-rhythm game via its music, but that's what separates something like Jewel Master from countless other throwaway action-platformers of the era. Holy Diver (the game, not the timeless work of Ronnie James Dio & co.) has a solid musical score from Irem soundsmith Masahiko Ishida, but I wouldn't call it one of his best. There's a few driving baroque gallops to enjoy here, a departure from his more avant-garde arcade work; shame the final stage and boss tracks are so irritating. Dissonance can work well for a game like this, just not when it accentuates the feeling that you, the player, aren't meant to have made it this far.
Nothing in this bastardization of the term "holy diver" feels player-friendly. It's one thing to be "hardcore" and another to just grind you down without any purpose beyond disincentivizing game rentals. The game loop starts out barbed and eventually becomes relentlessly lethal, going from tricky but learnable enemy patterns to minibosses every other screen with plenty of backup. Sure, I could viably learn and route the first half before this club week's end, but certainly not the latter portion. Irem's console developers decided to center most of the fatal encounters around rapid enemy spawns, which combine with pathetically short I-frames when hit to keep you on the backfoot. Now let's couple this with inexplicable, inconsistent input delays for essentials like crouching and jumping! It seems like they knew the game engine and physics have these issues, thus compensating via conspicuously fluid air control. (Diagonal attack aiming would have been nice…) From the very beginning, your reliable mobility and attack options aren't adequate for handling even the most basic foes with comfort. So here I am, stuck fighting basic right-to-left mooks I'd down quick in any other game like this, just with an unsatisfying handicap.
I've got not real investment in the story or in my conventional character advancement progression, either. What few new spells and items you get are necessary, but less than satisfying to use for the most part. You're often so deprived of magic points that using the more advanced offensive spells (Breaker and Thunder) gives diminishing returns. (Shoutouts to the former in stage 5, though, as its boss only seems possible with it.) On the other hand, Blizzard and Overdrive are practically required no matter your resources, whether for freezing lava & weaker enemies or to traverse later levels and survive their trap fights. Your basic pea-shooter attack loses its utility around mid-game except for saving mana, so the game revolves around mastering and carefully timing your spells. In my experience, this meant so many more retries than felt right for the scale of combat/puzzle complexity on offer. None of the lava sections are interesting by themselves, and the sheer repetition & re-skinning of enemy types left me wanting for any new interactions with my action verbs.
My time playing through to the end saw maybe hundreds of save states and reloads, enough to make me feel like Dio in the recording studio. I'm giving this software way too much credit with such a metaphor, but that's maybe the most relevant connection between it and those musical touchstones. Not that Holy Diver has any monopoly on the state-or-suffer experience among other kusoge or ball-busting challenges from this period. I'm just trying to process how a game can be this fascinatingly bad at delivering its purported narrative. Infinite continues mean little to me when that entails starting Kaizo-like levels over and over again, with not much gratification for learning the exact timing and enemy management between rooms. Our hero comes across less like a powerful, destined knight defeating evil, more like a renn-faire weekend warrior bumbling into the actual hell fathomed in medieval times. The best part of this game involves nothing about him—rather, I actually had a lot of fun using his dragon form to play a janky, all too short but empowering side-scrolling shooter.
So little about Holy Diver's sekaikan connects together, another symptom of rushed development. Take for instance any play on the titular song's lyrical depth vs. what one could charitably discern from the game. I'm not saving the people of the land from vice, temptations, or lack of faith; the only inhabitants in this world are monsters already. There's no higher justification of the protagonist's self-sacrificial fight against the Black Slayer, only a royalist desire to vanquish evil for his family's sake. Where even the hardest 'Vania faire in '89 gave you a fighting chance via wall-meat and other playground secrets, there's strikingly few optional risky rewards to find, just an unending torrent of trouble. Above all, this game can't decide if it's a prototype rushed to market, a failure of Nintendo's product testing system, or a loving fuck-you to Famicom gamers asking Irem for a taste of their arcade titles' famous difficulty walls. Also imagine if you were one of those highly-skilled players encountering the first half's bosses, all of whom are much easier than the levels before them for no good reason. Outdated stage design resembling Dragon Buster + inconsistent challenge and telegraphing to players = a weird 'ol time.
You know what this reminds me of? Psycho World for MSX2 and Master System, also released the same year. Hertz' sci-fantasy take on this combo of action-adventuring tropes pioneered by Konami, Capcom, etc. has an actual difficulty curve. It's got better visuals, a more pleasant soundtrack, and similar but far better mechanics + implementation in every way. The idea of tying your combat options into world progression exists in both games, but I'd much rather learn the ins and outs of the latter. Holy Diver constantly feels like a C-team effort finishing the work started by Irem's B-team, hence the gulf in quality between its nice visuals and shoddy backbone. Hell, the huge amount of slowdown throughout suggests unmet ambitions, and a commensurate lack of testing to account for enemy projectiles hiding in plain sight during the lag. I died so much just because I literally couldn't see bullets heading where I was—normally I love it when that happens in a classic arcade shooter! But we're nowhere near the harsh but fair likes of R-Type or Image Fight…just this ramshackle attempt to ride off other games' laurels.
What's baffling to me is how Irem/Tamtex's other '89 Famicom exclusive of note, a delightful riff on Rally-X called Gekitotsu Yonku Battle, feels more complete and supportive of its players but gets less attention overseas. This likely boils down to the haha-funny-lol rock references and familiar aesthetic of Holy Diver, but the difference in notability vs. quality really gets on my nerves. More aptly, it's that contrast between the hares and tortoises of the cult game sphere which stands out. Why play a solid, plainly iterative, score-focused arcade-y romp when this shambling but somehow appealing mess of an adventure beckons you? Playing through Holy Diver with 1989 skills, knowledge, and help from a talented friend or two (plus not knowing anything better to play) would have sweetened the deal. Today, though, I'm just glad this wasn't the best Irem had to offer for its Famicom audience. Metal Storm proved a year later how they could transfer their arcade greatness to the home with nary a compromise, too.
In summary, play Holy Diver if you're hankering for the '80s heavy metal garage band mixtape that sorely needed rehearsals and an original song or two. You might have to scrub or rewind a lot to reach the good moments, and there's plenty of studio-grade material from that milieu hitting the same vibes but with less pain. Just know that you'll either love this game's recalcitrance and irreverent attitude towards its cultural imprints, or you'll sigh and move on from this jalopy. I think it's worth a try for reasons beyond the kusoge reputation, mainly as an example of what Irem's console teams would avoid going forward. But I also had hopes that it'd hook me and having more staying power, even as a nigh unplayable crawl through chaos. The best I'll say is it often has pretty backgrounds & music, just nothing exemplary enough to transcend the game around them. Between my velvet cries, there's a truth that's hard as steel. You might even say ambition never dies; crimes against players are real~~~~~~
Completed for the Backloggd Discord server’s Game of the Week club, Feb. 21 - 27, 2023
Let's start with how this game ostensibly recreates Dio's famous album in action game form. I wish it had, but we're stuck with a lightly dressed-up imitation of better-known games, from Castlevania to Mega Man and beyond. Recontextualizing this non-committal attempt to iterate on other, better Famicom staples via a heavy metal coat of paint isn't the worst idea. Too bad this just doesn't evoke anything specifically like the musical influences it takes from. Where are the tigers?! The rainbows in the dark? Or anything beyond what the opening crawl exposits? I love the idea of saving the King Crimson family name just as much as anyone should, but here they've just slapped these references atop an otherwise workmanlike dark fantasy side-scroller. Compare this with the studio's old arcade dev chief, Tetsuo Nakano, asserting how you shouldn't "just set out to imitate someone else, for instance, you’ll always be behind the times".
I'll be fair and also criticize SEGA's Jewel Master for appropriating progressive rock and metal inspirations around the same time. There's a key difference, however: the Mega Drive game actually has a fitting prog soundtrack. Rarely do I start digging into a non-rhythm game via its music, but that's what separates something like Jewel Master from countless other throwaway action-platformers of the era. Holy Diver (the game, not the timeless work of Ronnie James Dio & co.) has a solid musical score from Irem soundsmith Masahiko Ishida, but I wouldn't call it one of his best. There's a few driving baroque gallops to enjoy here, a departure from his more avant-garde arcade work; shame the final stage and boss tracks are so irritating. Dissonance can work well for a game like this, just not when it accentuates the feeling that you, the player, aren't meant to have made it this far.
Nothing in this bastardization of the term "holy diver" feels player-friendly. It's one thing to be "hardcore" and another to just grind you down without any purpose beyond disincentivizing game rentals. The game loop starts out barbed and eventually becomes relentlessly lethal, going from tricky but learnable enemy patterns to minibosses every other screen with plenty of backup. Sure, I could viably learn and route the first half before this club week's end, but certainly not the latter portion. Irem's console developers decided to center most of the fatal encounters around rapid enemy spawns, which combine with pathetically short I-frames when hit to keep you on the backfoot. Now let's couple this with inexplicable, inconsistent input delays for essentials like crouching and jumping! It seems like they knew the game engine and physics have these issues, thus compensating via conspicuously fluid air control. (Diagonal attack aiming would have been nice…) From the very beginning, your reliable mobility and attack options aren't adequate for handling even the most basic foes with comfort. So here I am, stuck fighting basic right-to-left mooks I'd down quick in any other game like this, just with an unsatisfying handicap.
I've got not real investment in the story or in my conventional character advancement progression, either. What few new spells and items you get are necessary, but less than satisfying to use for the most part. You're often so deprived of magic points that using the more advanced offensive spells (Breaker and Thunder) gives diminishing returns. (Shoutouts to the former in stage 5, though, as its boss only seems possible with it.) On the other hand, Blizzard and Overdrive are practically required no matter your resources, whether for freezing lava & weaker enemies or to traverse later levels and survive their trap fights. Your basic pea-shooter attack loses its utility around mid-game except for saving mana, so the game revolves around mastering and carefully timing your spells. In my experience, this meant so many more retries than felt right for the scale of combat/puzzle complexity on offer. None of the lava sections are interesting by themselves, and the sheer repetition & re-skinning of enemy types left me wanting for any new interactions with my action verbs.
My time playing through to the end saw maybe hundreds of save states and reloads, enough to make me feel like Dio in the recording studio. I'm giving this software way too much credit with such a metaphor, but that's maybe the most relevant connection between it and those musical touchstones. Not that Holy Diver has any monopoly on the state-or-suffer experience among other kusoge or ball-busting challenges from this period. I'm just trying to process how a game can be this fascinatingly bad at delivering its purported narrative. Infinite continues mean little to me when that entails starting Kaizo-like levels over and over again, with not much gratification for learning the exact timing and enemy management between rooms. Our hero comes across less like a powerful, destined knight defeating evil, more like a renn-faire weekend warrior bumbling into the actual hell fathomed in medieval times. The best part of this game involves nothing about him—rather, I actually had a lot of fun using his dragon form to play a janky, all too short but empowering side-scrolling shooter.
So little about Holy Diver's sekaikan connects together, another symptom of rushed development. Take for instance any play on the titular song's lyrical depth vs. what one could charitably discern from the game. I'm not saving the people of the land from vice, temptations, or lack of faith; the only inhabitants in this world are monsters already. There's no higher justification of the protagonist's self-sacrificial fight against the Black Slayer, only a royalist desire to vanquish evil for his family's sake. Where even the hardest 'Vania faire in '89 gave you a fighting chance via wall-meat and other playground secrets, there's strikingly few optional risky rewards to find, just an unending torrent of trouble. Above all, this game can't decide if it's a prototype rushed to market, a failure of Nintendo's product testing system, or a loving fuck-you to Famicom gamers asking Irem for a taste of their arcade titles' famous difficulty walls. Also imagine if you were one of those highly-skilled players encountering the first half's bosses, all of whom are much easier than the levels before them for no good reason. Outdated stage design resembling Dragon Buster + inconsistent challenge and telegraphing to players = a weird 'ol time.
You know what this reminds me of? Psycho World for MSX2 and Master System, also released the same year. Hertz' sci-fantasy take on this combo of action-adventuring tropes pioneered by Konami, Capcom, etc. has an actual difficulty curve. It's got better visuals, a more pleasant soundtrack, and similar but far better mechanics + implementation in every way. The idea of tying your combat options into world progression exists in both games, but I'd much rather learn the ins and outs of the latter. Holy Diver constantly feels like a C-team effort finishing the work started by Irem's B-team, hence the gulf in quality between its nice visuals and shoddy backbone. Hell, the huge amount of slowdown throughout suggests unmet ambitions, and a commensurate lack of testing to account for enemy projectiles hiding in plain sight during the lag. I died so much just because I literally couldn't see bullets heading where I was—normally I love it when that happens in a classic arcade shooter! But we're nowhere near the harsh but fair likes of R-Type or Image Fight…just this ramshackle attempt to ride off other games' laurels.
What's baffling to me is how Irem/Tamtex's other '89 Famicom exclusive of note, a delightful riff on Rally-X called Gekitotsu Yonku Battle, feels more complete and supportive of its players but gets less attention overseas. This likely boils down to the haha-funny-lol rock references and familiar aesthetic of Holy Diver, but the difference in notability vs. quality really gets on my nerves. More aptly, it's that contrast between the hares and tortoises of the cult game sphere which stands out. Why play a solid, plainly iterative, score-focused arcade-y romp when this shambling but somehow appealing mess of an adventure beckons you? Playing through Holy Diver with 1989 skills, knowledge, and help from a talented friend or two (plus not knowing anything better to play) would have sweetened the deal. Today, though, I'm just glad this wasn't the best Irem had to offer for its Famicom audience. Metal Storm proved a year later how they could transfer their arcade greatness to the home with nary a compromise, too.
In summary, play Holy Diver if you're hankering for the '80s heavy metal garage band mixtape that sorely needed rehearsals and an original song or two. You might have to scrub or rewind a lot to reach the good moments, and there's plenty of studio-grade material from that milieu hitting the same vibes but with less pain. Just know that you'll either love this game's recalcitrance and irreverent attitude towards its cultural imprints, or you'll sigh and move on from this jalopy. I think it's worth a try for reasons beyond the kusoge reputation, mainly as an example of what Irem's console teams would avoid going forward. But I also had hopes that it'd hook me and having more staying power, even as a nigh unplayable crawl through chaos. The best I'll say is it often has pretty backgrounds & music, just nothing exemplary enough to transcend the game around them. Between my velvet cries, there's a truth that's hard as steel. You might even say ambition never dies; crimes against players are real