"Aight...imma head out." - Actual line of dialogue from this game
Neon White is an absolutely brilliant game where nobody can go 5 seconds without reminding you that the story is cringe. Personally I think that's a bit exaggerated, although I did reel back in my seat at the occasional Gen Z/gamer speak (Steve Blum says "OP" and "no cap" out loud). The main characters start as very over-the-top cliches: the edgy protag, the dudebro sidekick, the femme fatale love interest, and basically a yandere? But over time, parts of their personas are slightly peeled away, the voice actors stop screaming their lines, and you get the occasional heartfelt messaging of the game. It's not the most interesting story of all time, and its feels intentionally cheesy, but it's enough to tie the levels together well and give some nice down time here and there. The visual novel style is probably the greatest contrast one could have to the tight speedrun design of the gameplay.
"You're laughing. We inadvertently sent some Neon to his grave, and you're laughing." - Reference to a viral 'Joker' (2019) quote
The gameplay is of course where all the praise for this game goes. Some of the tightest level design I've ever experience, I'd say 80% of the time I could figure out where to go on my first attempt without really slowing down. The short length of every level (usually a minute or less, with the occasional 2 minute gauntlet or 4 minute bossfight) makes failure almost a non-issue; I never raged once at this game. Clarity of objectives, the unique card system and fluidity of shooting or discarding, and the insane momentum you carry makes this a speedy but not technically demanding game (even on Switch handheld it works well). The skill ceiling for what is required of the player is decently low, unlike Celeste, which I draw comparisons to because of its similar quick respawn system and because I don't play many platformers. All you need to rank up is Gold medals, so any time saves beyond that is purely for your own enjoyment rather than progression, and the game gets you into a comfortable enough groove that it was rare that I had to retry a level to get a Gold.
"You're so lucky you don't have big boobs, White." - Another actual line of dialogue from this game
The presents were a cool idea at first, as you approach the game entirely differently, scouting for the present while preserving cards so that you can actually reach them. However, this was the least enjoyable part for me because it goes against the whole ethos of the game. Once the novelty wears off it becomes frustrating to slowly observe the levels instead of going fast which is so much more fun. And you need to get them all for the true ending so they're very encouraged.
"Isn't it freaking crazy that JOHN CENA is here in HEAVEN, giving us missions?!" - Line delivery from a voice actor who also stars in 'O.K.K.O: Let's Be Heroes'
The sad thing with a game about going fast, is that it will inevitably be quite short, lest the developers design 1000 levels to compensate. By the 5 hour mark I reached Neon Rank 1 and had already found about 30 presents. If like me you aren't super interested in the Rushes modes or getting times as low as possible, then unfortunately your journey with this game won't last forever. In a way though, this is a great pick-up and play game if you have 20 minutes to spare.
"It's like how you can never be a true gamer if you only ever play on easy mode." - Average Dark Souls fan
Overall, Neon White is an awesome, super fun game with a goofy story, and it makes for a fun demo of what it's like to be a speedrunner, but without the part where you watch Lakitu fly in front of Peach's castle for the 1000th reset.
Neon White is an absolutely brilliant game where nobody can go 5 seconds without reminding you that the story is cringe. Personally I think that's a bit exaggerated, although I did reel back in my seat at the occasional Gen Z/gamer speak (Steve Blum says "OP" and "no cap" out loud). The main characters start as very over-the-top cliches: the edgy protag, the dudebro sidekick, the femme fatale love interest, and basically a yandere? But over time, parts of their personas are slightly peeled away, the voice actors stop screaming their lines, and you get the occasional heartfelt messaging of the game. It's not the most interesting story of all time, and its feels intentionally cheesy, but it's enough to tie the levels together well and give some nice down time here and there. The visual novel style is probably the greatest contrast one could have to the tight speedrun design of the gameplay.
"You're laughing. We inadvertently sent some Neon to his grave, and you're laughing." - Reference to a viral 'Joker' (2019) quote
The gameplay is of course where all the praise for this game goes. Some of the tightest level design I've ever experience, I'd say 80% of the time I could figure out where to go on my first attempt without really slowing down. The short length of every level (usually a minute or less, with the occasional 2 minute gauntlet or 4 minute bossfight) makes failure almost a non-issue; I never raged once at this game. Clarity of objectives, the unique card system and fluidity of shooting or discarding, and the insane momentum you carry makes this a speedy but not technically demanding game (even on Switch handheld it works well). The skill ceiling for what is required of the player is decently low, unlike Celeste, which I draw comparisons to because of its similar quick respawn system and because I don't play many platformers. All you need to rank up is Gold medals, so any time saves beyond that is purely for your own enjoyment rather than progression, and the game gets you into a comfortable enough groove that it was rare that I had to retry a level to get a Gold.
"You're so lucky you don't have big boobs, White." - Another actual line of dialogue from this game
The presents were a cool idea at first, as you approach the game entirely differently, scouting for the present while preserving cards so that you can actually reach them. However, this was the least enjoyable part for me because it goes against the whole ethos of the game. Once the novelty wears off it becomes frustrating to slowly observe the levels instead of going fast which is so much more fun. And you need to get them all for the true ending so they're very encouraged.
"Isn't it freaking crazy that JOHN CENA is here in HEAVEN, giving us missions?!" - Line delivery from a voice actor who also stars in 'O.K.K.O: Let's Be Heroes'
The sad thing with a game about going fast, is that it will inevitably be quite short, lest the developers design 1000 levels to compensate. By the 5 hour mark I reached Neon Rank 1 and had already found about 30 presents. If like me you aren't super interested in the Rushes modes or getting times as low as possible, then unfortunately your journey with this game won't last forever. In a way though, this is a great pick-up and play game if you have 20 minutes to spare.
"It's like how you can never be a true gamer if you only ever play on easy mode." - Average Dark Souls fan
Overall, Neon White is an awesome, super fun game with a goofy story, and it makes for a fun demo of what it's like to be a speedrunner, but without the part where you watch Lakitu fly in front of Peach's castle for the 1000th reset.