Yeah Idk what you guys saw in this that I couldn't, but I've played many 3D platformers in my time and none were as mixed as Corn Kidz 64, but i'm getting ahead of myself here. Let me explain my entire experience with this game.

To start off, that damn wall jump and wall climb can go fuck itself. That is the most unintuitive unresponsive inconsistent move this goat has. Every time you think you're against the wall, it looks like you weren't lol oh well fall back down 3 floors and try again. I've tried so many times to learn what I did wrong and every time its something different. The fall damage, why in the ever living christ did you think it was a good idea to give this type of precise platforming game fall damage. That's like giving the getting over it dude fall damage. it works with Mario and Banjo because those games don't require you to do pin point precision platforming. This is a different case, and I swear every time you fall in this game there is nothing more infuriating than just being teleported to your save and having to sit through that death animation and pointless game over screen over and over again. When death has no consequence in this game I wonder why there's even a game over screen to begin with. Just play the death animation and teleport me back to the start. It's that easy.

The platforming is difficult. I'm ok with challenging platforming, if your protagonist controls well and isn't fighting me half of the time. I think this game asks too much of the player that progression goes from 0 to 100 really fast. Combined with very poor level gimmicks like those stupid owls that you have to hit into place all the time because their dumbass can't stay in one position. It becomes frustrating so fast. The humor misses the mark a lot and while there maybe a good one or two jokes here it's not enough to make me care about what's happening on screen. I mainly stuck around for as long as I did for the platforming aspect. The platforming can be fun, when you're swinging together move after move seamlessly and you're in a platforming flow state I think that's where this game shines, but whenever I have fun i'm reminded of how annoying it is for the level design to send you back like 3 floors after falling. This game shines the most with its visuals and atmosphere, it has the perfect hazy N64 vibe and I enjoy it a lot. It's definitely one of the two reasons I kept playing at least. The music itself is also just ok, some are fine but there are tracks in here that I don't really find myself caring about all too much.

There's definitely a good foundation for a full game here but what i'm playing feels like a tech demo at most, for 7-8$ you get what you paid for but i've played cheaper games that are more fun than this. Check this one out at your own cost, I didn't like it, but I know a lot of people did.

Reviewed on May 13, 2024


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