When you're four years old, you're the biggest dumbass on the planet. You're a big stupid poo poo head. Any other idiot could walk up and pretend to pull a quarter out of your ear, and you'll be amazed and stop cleaning your ears out of fear of losing anymore quarters coming out of them.
When we came home with Sonic & Knuckles, I was astonished at this supposed new abra kapocus-hocus kadabra bullshit that has warped time and space to allow Knuckles to appear in Sonic 2. Woah, what are you doing Knucklehead, this is Sonic's game!! Not no more! The dumbass wheels in my dumbass kid brain started turning, then they started hitting the thick mud that made up the majority of my head and began digging up dumbass ideas that only a child with no concept of how things work would think of. I could make Knuckles appear in Sonic 2, clearly that means I could make Sonic characters appear in other games too! Alright Sonic, we're playing some goddamned football! Then what do you know, I get greeted with "NO WAY!" on the TV screen and become dumbfounded and insulted.
What do you mean you don't wanna play Joe Montana Football?!? What are you? An idiot?! I thought you were cool Sonic! I'm tired of my best friend stabbing me in the back. You think I'm playing? Sonic, I'm not playing. I'm gonna rip your head off. You're supposed to be my friend!
Flying Battery Zone solos the entire Mario franchise.
When we came home with Sonic & Knuckles, I was astonished at this supposed new abra kapocus-hocus kadabra bullshit that has warped time and space to allow Knuckles to appear in Sonic 2. Woah, what are you doing Knucklehead, this is Sonic's game!! Not no more! The dumbass wheels in my dumbass kid brain started turning, then they started hitting the thick mud that made up the majority of my head and began digging up dumbass ideas that only a child with no concept of how things work would think of. I could make Knuckles appear in Sonic 2, clearly that means I could make Sonic characters appear in other games too! Alright Sonic, we're playing some goddamned football! Then what do you know, I get greeted with "NO WAY!" on the TV screen and become dumbfounded and insulted.
What do you mean you don't wanna play Joe Montana Football?!? What are you? An idiot?! I thought you were cool Sonic! I'm tired of my best friend stabbing me in the back. You think I'm playing? Sonic, I'm not playing. I'm gonna rip your head off. You're supposed to be my friend!
Flying Battery Zone solos the entire Mario franchise.
4 Comments
I hate to tell you this but when I was four my mom said I was the smartest person in the world
@thealexmott Joe Montana was a genuine fan of Altered Beast, when Sega pulled it as their pack-in title and replaced it with Sonic he got super mad and threw a football at one of the exec's groin like in that Hans Moleman bit. That was why he didn't renew his contract with Sega. :T
@Gare I actually agree with her, you at four years old is probably smarter than me at my current age.
@Gare I actually agree with her, you at four years old is probably smarter than me at my current age.
I really enjoyed the first two paragraphs ahaha
thealexmott
1 month ago