(Winner of Beta’s Alpha Award for worst early access game)
3.3 million-fucking-dollars. And that was just the first half of a game that is basically a pop-up book voiced by frodo. Only way you’re getting that second half is if you BUY THE EARLY ACCESS GAME.
So let’s recap what happened: Tim Schaefer suckerd a bunch of nostalgic buffoons into funding his “Grand Idea”, only to be fed lies and disappointment. Unable to meet the release date and features originally promised, Double Fine went out and released what most would consider a proof of concept, let alone an actual game. Broken Age is the definition of overpromising and under delivering and honestly, that’s an understatement. Next time you think about backing a Kickstarter or purchasing an Early Access game, remember that night when Ol’ Timmy fucked you in the ass and didn’t have the courtesy to give you a reach around.
(Winner of Pixels Are Art 2 for most pretentious indie game)
You can measure a game’s pretentiousness by how many characters sport the rosy colored nose made popular by Penny Arcade comics and 4chan’s sister website, Tumblr. The gaming equivalent of a horn rimmed, type-writer punching, scarf wielding, latte drinking hipster who sexually identifies as a cross gendered redwood tree, Broken Age took pretentiousness to new heights. Its art style is one that tries to convey serious emotional depth without being constricted by realism. Unfortunately, it removes the effect Double Fine attempted to get across with its so called story. Broken Age shouldn’t even be considered a game as each scene is barely held together by such weak gameplay elements, it’s hard to believe it cost more than 3 million dollars to develop. Broken Age’s narrative tries so hard to break from the norm that it’s hard to take seriously. Mixing themes of racism, independence, and predetermined destinies don’t mix well when you’ve got Jack Black shitting golden eggs as a way to advance your story.
3.3 million-fucking-dollars. And that was just the first half of a game that is basically a pop-up book voiced by frodo. Only way you’re getting that second half is if you BUY THE EARLY ACCESS GAME.
So let’s recap what happened: Tim Schaefer suckerd a bunch of nostalgic buffoons into funding his “Grand Idea”, only to be fed lies and disappointment. Unable to meet the release date and features originally promised, Double Fine went out and released what most would consider a proof of concept, let alone an actual game. Broken Age is the definition of overpromising and under delivering and honestly, that’s an understatement. Next time you think about backing a Kickstarter or purchasing an Early Access game, remember that night when Ol’ Timmy fucked you in the ass and didn’t have the courtesy to give you a reach around.
(Winner of Pixels Are Art 2 for most pretentious indie game)
You can measure a game’s pretentiousness by how many characters sport the rosy colored nose made popular by Penny Arcade comics and 4chan’s sister website, Tumblr. The gaming equivalent of a horn rimmed, type-writer punching, scarf wielding, latte drinking hipster who sexually identifies as a cross gendered redwood tree, Broken Age took pretentiousness to new heights. Its art style is one that tries to convey serious emotional depth without being constricted by realism. Unfortunately, it removes the effect Double Fine attempted to get across with its so called story. Broken Age shouldn’t even be considered a game as each scene is barely held together by such weak gameplay elements, it’s hard to believe it cost more than 3 million dollars to develop. Broken Age’s narrative tries so hard to break from the norm that it’s hard to take seriously. Mixing themes of racism, independence, and predetermined destinies don’t mix well when you’ve got Jack Black shitting golden eggs as a way to advance your story.