A love letter to Ragnarok Online, the video game that saved my life.
Disclaimer: This is not a review. This is not an objective evaluation of the game, but a recap of my experience as someone who played this game for over 10k hours.
Depending on when you ask me, I might say that playing a MMORPGs is the worst decision that someone can make, and to an extent I still agree with that; I’ve seen many times how massive multiplayer games drain the life and health of those who are not able to separate them to their real life. Yet, Ragnarok Online, a MMORPG, saved my life when I needed it the most. This game not only saved my life but literally shaped the person I am today, and for that I will be grateful until the day I die.
Between 2007 and 2014 this game meant absolutely everything to me. All the problems that my family and school meant to me. The daily abuse at home and domestic violence, the drug problems and all the consequences that entailed, the failures and bullying at school, the uncomfortable days of staying with my father’s side of the family who constantly mistreated me and stole my belongings, could be endured thanks to the times I could get to the PC room, boot my mother’s Windows and log in to the only safe space that I had.
The game was launched in Europe in 2004 and I recall seeing it for the first time around 2006 when I was a kid and saw my cousin playing. I started playing in 2007 on my mother’s computer and since then, I have been playing on and off until a few years ago.
Ragnarok Online, unlike other MMORPGs, simply allowed you to create your character and then dropped you in the middle of a city. No tutorial, no quests, no context on the menus, not even a simple “how to move” guide. God knows I absolutely adored that. Being able to not only discover all the cities and dungeons from the game but how the game worked (skills, systems, etc.) was amazingly fun. I strongly believe this made me curious by nature, stirred me towards the IT world and shaped my hacker-esque nature that prompts me to try to understand how everything around me works.
The job system was incredibly fun, it allowed you to build your character the way you preferred; Put points in the stats you wanted and only level up the skills you’d like the most. The cities were extremely interactive: all of them were full of NPCs that really conveyed that the world was alive instead of overloading you with meaningless quests. You’d not feel special or a “chosen one” but instead you constantly felt as if you were in a real world. The OST for this game is, to put it simply, a work of art; No wonder some of the most recognized doujin video game creators and music producers based some of their works on it or made remixes of the game soundtrack.
But what I really hope to never forget are all the beautiful memories I made thanks to the people I had the pleasure to meet in this game. There are way too many good memories and friends to count here, and although I will not be able to talk with most of the friends I made because we lost contact many years ago, they will forever accompany me in my memories and heart.
Not only this game shaped me by starting my interest in programming, developed my love for video games and allowed me to overcome trauma and social anxiety that otherwise would have ended my life, but the friends and people I met there really helped me to move forward in life and made me see that there’s good in the world and things worth living for.
No words will ever be able to describe how important and meaningful this video game is for me nor I expect to be able to convey my feelings, but I will forever feel indebted so there’s only one thing I would like to say:
Thanks for everything, Ragnarok Online.
Disclaimer: This is not a review. This is not an objective evaluation of the game, but a recap of my experience as someone who played this game for over 10k hours.
Depending on when you ask me, I might say that playing a MMORPGs is the worst decision that someone can make, and to an extent I still agree with that; I’ve seen many times how massive multiplayer games drain the life and health of those who are not able to separate them to their real life. Yet, Ragnarok Online, a MMORPG, saved my life when I needed it the most. This game not only saved my life but literally shaped the person I am today, and for that I will be grateful until the day I die.
Between 2007 and 2014 this game meant absolutely everything to me. All the problems that my family and school meant to me. The daily abuse at home and domestic violence, the drug problems and all the consequences that entailed, the failures and bullying at school, the uncomfortable days of staying with my father’s side of the family who constantly mistreated me and stole my belongings, could be endured thanks to the times I could get to the PC room, boot my mother’s Windows and log in to the only safe space that I had.
The game was launched in Europe in 2004 and I recall seeing it for the first time around 2006 when I was a kid and saw my cousin playing. I started playing in 2007 on my mother’s computer and since then, I have been playing on and off until a few years ago.
Ragnarok Online, unlike other MMORPGs, simply allowed you to create your character and then dropped you in the middle of a city. No tutorial, no quests, no context on the menus, not even a simple “how to move” guide. God knows I absolutely adored that. Being able to not only discover all the cities and dungeons from the game but how the game worked (skills, systems, etc.) was amazingly fun. I strongly believe this made me curious by nature, stirred me towards the IT world and shaped my hacker-esque nature that prompts me to try to understand how everything around me works.
The job system was incredibly fun, it allowed you to build your character the way you preferred; Put points in the stats you wanted and only level up the skills you’d like the most. The cities were extremely interactive: all of them were full of NPCs that really conveyed that the world was alive instead of overloading you with meaningless quests. You’d not feel special or a “chosen one” but instead you constantly felt as if you were in a real world. The OST for this game is, to put it simply, a work of art; No wonder some of the most recognized doujin video game creators and music producers based some of their works on it or made remixes of the game soundtrack.
But what I really hope to never forget are all the beautiful memories I made thanks to the people I had the pleasure to meet in this game. There are way too many good memories and friends to count here, and although I will not be able to talk with most of the friends I made because we lost contact many years ago, they will forever accompany me in my memories and heart.
Not only this game shaped me by starting my interest in programming, developed my love for video games and allowed me to overcome trauma and social anxiety that otherwise would have ended my life, but the friends and people I met there really helped me to move forward in life and made me see that there’s good in the world and things worth living for.
No words will ever be able to describe how important and meaningful this video game is for me nor I expect to be able to convey my feelings, but I will forever feel indebted so there’s only one thing I would like to say:
Thanks for everything, Ragnarok Online.