i was talking with a friend the other day about progression systems in games--we reached a similar conclusion in that a game having a poor progression system is, well, worse than having none at all. i don't think i'm too zoomerpilled to always need some digital goodies to chase after, and i'm not against having something to work toward. but on that note... what in god's name are halo infinite's unlocks? color schemes? emblems? are you serious? we're locking being a purple and white spartan behind a paywall now? worse, the emblem customization has somehow regressed since the days of reach, players limited to only handfuls of combinations. why?

but okay, okay, fine, let's lock off colors and cartoon insignias. so i can work towards the specific stuff i want, right? if i want to be purple and white, i just save up enough exp to earn it? nope, lol, it's a linear progression system. you earn unlocks one ugly piece of armor at a time, the things you actually want stretched so far off into the horizon you could point straight up and see it on the other side of the halo ring. in halo reach, the grind felt rough, but you could at least outright save up for what you wanted and eventually deck out your spartan exactly how you wanted them to look. instead, this sort of backwards-ass system means players are just wearing whatever they've recently unlocked because they want you to know that they're level 69 every time they enter the spectator camera for t-bagging.

well, whatever. i can grind out some exp. i just need to play well, bag some kills, claim some flags, maybe take a double and triple kill here or there, yeah? nope. 343i certainly did take inspiration from reach in the case of its daily and weekly challenges, except they took it a step further and decided those would be the only way to actually progress. spend a game sitting pretty at the top of the leaderboards because you successfully kept yourself alive for most of the match, fending off enemies and working towards objectives, and you're rewarded with 0 exp because you didn't get 3 kills with the covenant nerf rifle or you didn't do 5 push ups or whatever horseshit 343i has in rotation. and i want to ask why this system exists, but why bother: it's designed so that player skill isn't rewarded and random happenstance is. you don't want your players feeling bad for not being good, after all, so let's punish absolutely everyone and keep the rewards nice and braindead.

let's go back to the original point. why is a bad progression system worse than no system at all? because with no system, you've got the game and nothing else. you dress up your guy the way you want, hop in with your friends, and play some damn halo. when you've got a bad system, you have a constant ugly reminder in your face that you're 100000 points away from unlocking a carpal tunnel wrist brace or hello kitty bandaids and all you gotta do is trim your nuts with the energy sword 7 times!!! horrible. i want to make my character look how i like, not sit here with the default goon set punished because i want to use more than two colors for my guy.

there's other annoying aspects to halo infinite's multiplayer, like how i can group up with friends and join a big team game only for the match to stick me in a squad with three stooges i don't even know. what the hell is up with that? why would you ever design a squad system like that? and the fucking ai voice, oh my god. it doesn't matter which shrill one you pick, they all sound like the sloppiest marvel movie seconds possible written by actual honest to god dunces. want to mute it? sure, but you have to mute the game announcer too in the same breath, and HE actually has useful information to tell you that isn't "OWWWWOE YOU GOTTTT THE LASER PISTOL SPARTAN! CAREFUL YOU DON'T SMOKE YOUR NUTS WITH THESE HHOHOHOHOWAAHAHHWA!"

jesus.

Reviewed on Dec 16, 2021


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