Game Review - originally written by Spinner 8

Let’s just get this out of the way here: Goemon kicks ass. Ass. Do you hear. Okay. You may remember this fellow from a few games (three I think) called Mystical Ninja. But there were a whole HELL of a lot more in Japan. Yup. This is the first one. It’s pretty simple, but it’s fun, so yay. You run around and smack people (but not the ladies, please) and collect three passes to move on. I guess Goemon’s this hero fellow who gives to the poor and stuff, but it’s hard to tell. You can upgrade your shoes to run faster, and you get a slingshot, and a candle so you can see hidden stairways, and a whole hell of a lot of items that I don’t know WHAT they’re used for, and this sentence doesn’t make much sense. Just play the game dammit. Geez.

Reviewed on Dec 14, 2023


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