I played this all the way through when it came out, and after replaying the first Zero game for the third time, I thought I'd try this one again for the second. Welp, I forgot most of it, because it's mostly forgettable and it can get incredibly frustrating quite often.

I love the idea of trying to replicate the thrill of an old NES game, but in reality, it's really hard to do right. The first Zero worked because it was just polish on what was already a competent game. Some things were streamlined as there were more buttons to use and greater processing power, but the maps, avatars, and creatures generally stayed the same. They moved at the same pace, they had the same behavior, and because it worked 35 years ago, it continues to work now.

But with Zero 2, they attempted to create new levels, new creatures, and new rules, but unfortunately didn't change the avatars enough to make the clashes work. Jason still moves like a turd, but some of the new creatures now move faster, or there will be an unfair number on the screen and they all can shoot, and they shoot often. So instead of having the space and ability to plan out how to react (because Jason can't run, you need that space), you have to mash the dodge button and hope you get enough parries off to clear enough of the screen away to get some breathing room.

The car just drives and jumps with that satisfying heft, but now you have to fight other cars, and they can shoot faster than you and hit harder than you. These battles turn into ones of attrition, as you repeat the same moves in a cycle, firing off shots conservatively, which isn't inherently bad, but this should last 3-5 cycles, not 20-30.

There's a neat story in here, where Jason and Eve meet other cars with drivers and robots, but it is reduced down to a handful. This one is a Japanese farmer swordsman, this one is a plant lady (with plant boobs), this one is a WWII soldier guy, and of course, none of them will listen to Jason until after a dumb fight.

It's exhausting and frustrating, and it really dampens the fun in the car exploration. I put this down in the second half of the split planet in favor of something else. I'm not sure if I'll ever pick it up again or if I'll pick up the third one or not.

It's not a wash, it's not terrible, it's mostly fun, but the parts that aren't fun are REALLY not fun. It's a bummer.

Reviewed on Mar 29, 2024


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