Coming from the minds of Klei Entertainment, who gave us the wonderful Don’t Starve games, I’m not sure how they could fumble the bag this hard when it comes to bringing everyone’s childhood fantasy of the floor is lava to life. Hot Lava is what you get when the powers that be decide we need another soulless platformer with half-baked concepts. You have grocery stores, arcades, schools, and houses to monkey-bar swing through, slide by, and jump on as you collect cards and finish races. I originally intended to 100% the game but before I got halfway through I realized I couldn’t. Conceptually the game does everything right, it’s when you get into the details that its mediocrity starts to become apparent.

For one thing, you’re restricted to choosing only one special jump ability at a time. Why? I cannot fathom why. Even with the jetpack and pogo stick levels this game is extremely short-lived in how much it will entertain you. This game needs about three times as many abilities as it has, because a jump and a swing just doesn’t cut it when you get past the intro world. The easiest one that trivializes a lot is probably the double jump, but they all have their niches. It doesn’t matter though because only one ability at a time for you mister. Can’t be getting too crazy with it. It’s like the lay-up was right there for them. Just add a little more. They didn’t even change the worlds themselves to include new platforming challenges. The settings change yet the set pieces remain the same, making it feel real samey after a too-short time.

This is another one of those customize your character and earn little trinkets kind of game. A choice I question when again, this game does little to refine platforming past the year 2000. I legitimately wonder how anyone could get sucked into this game to be invested enough to try to complete their passes. If I were a little kid again I think I would just prefer to stick to real life fantasies. There might not be a double jump in real life, but I can promise you there’s so much more challenge and excitement there than this game could ever bring. Hopefully Hot Lava doesn’t stop us from one day getting a real contender for best new platformer using the novel concept it’s based on. I know I’m being harsher than it deserves, it’s just this game is almost comically boring and safe.

Hot Lava is a fun movement/parkour game that follows a good formula throughout the game. You spend most of your time going through different areas and bunny-hopping around the platforms. One of the best parts about this game is how fluid the game can get when your hops just start to flow and your speed picks up. This can be great and a lot of fun however a lot of the time these moments are cut short by other obstacles that you need to climb or swing on that just kill your momentum. Other times it’s just the level design that keeps you in areas that are too cramped and just don’t allow you to go fast without knowing the map layout. It’s times like these that make Hot Lava a game that’s just not all that fun. I do, however, feel that the good outweighs the bad and for the most part, Hot Lava was an enjoyable experience to play.