2012.
Imagine a young preteen boy living out what was one of the worst years of his life. Puberty was settling upon him, causing massive changes to his body and mind, a torturous calamity the result of aging in the physical sense. This kid was a dumbass clown, never taking the right things seriously, never taking the right things jokingly.
An amoeba of borderline incel like emotions, harboring feelings for every pretty girl he'd lay his eyes on regardless of if their character was good or if he was even being reasonable in his attractions.
During one of the most emotional and terrible times of his life, the man who would eventually become his brother in law got him several Christmas Gifts for the Xbox 360 he had gotten maybe only a year or two prior. There were many games, Gears of War, Batman Arkham City, etc.
But chief among them was Fallout New Vegas.
2009-2010
Jump back a few years to when the boy was younger. He had recently left public school to enter what would be a hellish and depressive 3 year stint as a homeschooler. His half brother had recently returned into his life after mostly being out of the picture. At this point of his life, the boy was losing connection with his social life, becoming an isolated little shrimp who dare not speak to others in complete social fear. Alone, every day in his house, learning propagandist Christian homeschool work. Just him, and his brother, a recovering alcoholic.
One day, the boy and his father go to the basement where the brother lived his days out. He was playing a particular game on his Playstation 3, wearing this Abe Lincoln hat in game and wandering this devastated yet familiar landscape. The brother talked about it being the third entry in the Fallout series, and mentioned that a new game would be coming out called Fallout New Vegas.
2000-2009
The boy is born, his life shaped by his parent's love for old media. His dad really loved old music like Frank Sinatra, and once in a Blue Moon, the boy and his dad would watch an old picture together, something that made the father very happy.
The boy spent a lot of time with his mom in this time, his parents were divorced around his second to third year of existence you see. The boy would visit her work place and her parents frequently, the D.C. area was very familiar to him.
It felt like home.
2009-2010
The boy recognizes the setting of this third Fallout game to be a destroyed version of his home, with music playing that reminded him much of songs his father and him would listen too.
2011
The brother would leave and join the military. The boy never felt so alone before in his entire life.
2012
The boy returns to school, his social awareness crippled by years spent languishing on Youtube alone and being brainwashed by the Christian agenda.
He meets friends he would keep for what is currently the remainder of his life.
Which brings us to Christmas of 2012 once again.
At first the boy was not interested in this Fallout New Vegas, his cousin had ruined first person shooters for him, constantly tearing away his freedom from his own devices in order to play schlock like Modern Warfare 3.
There was a trauma that happened, we won't go into the details, but it severely impacted the boy for the rest of his life, even now.
Fallout New Vegas is what carried him through it.
It's what carried me through the difficult times in my life.
Fallout New Vegas is a game that is so heavily focused on showing both the consequences of your actions while simultaneously telling you to move on from the past and keep living.
Despite its post apocalyptic world, the people of New Vegas are always trying to keep going, with the backing track of songs like Jingle Jangle Jingle being very much about continuing forward through life, while other tracks like Blue Moon and Ain't That a Kick in The Head show the positive consequences that showing affection to another person can bring.
All of these songs brought together by the calm yet caring voice of Mr. New Vegas, who despite not being real in both the game and in real life, comforted me greatly and made me feel like I was wanted. That I belonged somewhere in this twisted awful place in my life.
I spent a lot of time with my companions, one in particular being Craig Boone, the soldier who lost his wife to slavery. Even to this day I sympathize with his character. This is a man who has had to suffer so much pain, even outside of just his wife and unborn child being enslaved and him mercy killing them. He's killed innocent people under orders, despite not wanting too, and at the end of the day he can atone, and be loved.
Many of the companions fit with this central theme of moving on from the past and embracing the choices you make. Veronica, Raul, Cass, Rex, ED-E, Lily, Arcade, and that's not even getting on the DLC companions, all of them have to learn to either move on or accept the past.
I think that's why this game has the draw it has, and honestly why it's so beloved by the transgender community. I'm not going to speak for them honestly, I am a cis male, but I think I understand why they love it so much.
The freedom of being able to carve your own path forward, and leave that past behind, having the choices you make find you a place to belong, I get it.
I think a part of me is very sentimental over this game, despite its various bugs and gameplay issues, but you'll have to forgive me it's almost been 10 years that this game has been in my life.
Fallout New Vegas is very much about making a new chapter in your life, and honestly...
It saved mine.
Imagine a young preteen boy living out what was one of the worst years of his life. Puberty was settling upon him, causing massive changes to his body and mind, a torturous calamity the result of aging in the physical sense. This kid was a dumbass clown, never taking the right things seriously, never taking the right things jokingly.
An amoeba of borderline incel like emotions, harboring feelings for every pretty girl he'd lay his eyes on regardless of if their character was good or if he was even being reasonable in his attractions.
During one of the most emotional and terrible times of his life, the man who would eventually become his brother in law got him several Christmas Gifts for the Xbox 360 he had gotten maybe only a year or two prior. There were many games, Gears of War, Batman Arkham City, etc.
But chief among them was Fallout New Vegas.
2009-2010
Jump back a few years to when the boy was younger. He had recently left public school to enter what would be a hellish and depressive 3 year stint as a homeschooler. His half brother had recently returned into his life after mostly being out of the picture. At this point of his life, the boy was losing connection with his social life, becoming an isolated little shrimp who dare not speak to others in complete social fear. Alone, every day in his house, learning propagandist Christian homeschool work. Just him, and his brother, a recovering alcoholic.
One day, the boy and his father go to the basement where the brother lived his days out. He was playing a particular game on his Playstation 3, wearing this Abe Lincoln hat in game and wandering this devastated yet familiar landscape. The brother talked about it being the third entry in the Fallout series, and mentioned that a new game would be coming out called Fallout New Vegas.
2000-2009
The boy is born, his life shaped by his parent's love for old media. His dad really loved old music like Frank Sinatra, and once in a Blue Moon, the boy and his dad would watch an old picture together, something that made the father very happy.
The boy spent a lot of time with his mom in this time, his parents were divorced around his second to third year of existence you see. The boy would visit her work place and her parents frequently, the D.C. area was very familiar to him.
It felt like home.
2009-2010
The boy recognizes the setting of this third Fallout game to be a destroyed version of his home, with music playing that reminded him much of songs his father and him would listen too.
2011
The brother would leave and join the military. The boy never felt so alone before in his entire life.
2012
The boy returns to school, his social awareness crippled by years spent languishing on Youtube alone and being brainwashed by the Christian agenda.
He meets friends he would keep for what is currently the remainder of his life.
Which brings us to Christmas of 2012 once again.
At first the boy was not interested in this Fallout New Vegas, his cousin had ruined first person shooters for him, constantly tearing away his freedom from his own devices in order to play schlock like Modern Warfare 3.
There was a trauma that happened, we won't go into the details, but it severely impacted the boy for the rest of his life, even now.
Fallout New Vegas is what carried him through it.
It's what carried me through the difficult times in my life.
Fallout New Vegas is a game that is so heavily focused on showing both the consequences of your actions while simultaneously telling you to move on from the past and keep living.
Despite its post apocalyptic world, the people of New Vegas are always trying to keep going, with the backing track of songs like Jingle Jangle Jingle being very much about continuing forward through life, while other tracks like Blue Moon and Ain't That a Kick in The Head show the positive consequences that showing affection to another person can bring.
All of these songs brought together by the calm yet caring voice of Mr. New Vegas, who despite not being real in both the game and in real life, comforted me greatly and made me feel like I was wanted. That I belonged somewhere in this twisted awful place in my life.
I spent a lot of time with my companions, one in particular being Craig Boone, the soldier who lost his wife to slavery. Even to this day I sympathize with his character. This is a man who has had to suffer so much pain, even outside of just his wife and unborn child being enslaved and him mercy killing them. He's killed innocent people under orders, despite not wanting too, and at the end of the day he can atone, and be loved.
Many of the companions fit with this central theme of moving on from the past and embracing the choices you make. Veronica, Raul, Cass, Rex, ED-E, Lily, Arcade, and that's not even getting on the DLC companions, all of them have to learn to either move on or accept the past.
I think that's why this game has the draw it has, and honestly why it's so beloved by the transgender community. I'm not going to speak for them honestly, I am a cis male, but I think I understand why they love it so much.
The freedom of being able to carve your own path forward, and leave that past behind, having the choices you make find you a place to belong, I get it.
I think a part of me is very sentimental over this game, despite its various bugs and gameplay issues, but you'll have to forgive me it's almost been 10 years that this game has been in my life.
Fallout New Vegas is very much about making a new chapter in your life, and honestly...
It saved mine.