Legend of Zelda: Orcarina of Time is the worst game I have ever played in my life. Every aspect of the game was developed by monkeys, and it shows.
As a follow-up to the NES hit, Zelda II: Link's Adventure, Nintendo wanted to approach this game with a more minimalist mentality. So on a shoestring budget of fourteen dollars, Timecube Miyazaki got drunk and made this game in a weekend. But accidentally, Nintendo shipped the game into stores, forcing Nintendo to enter bankruptcy.
So where do I start with a travesty like this? The controls range from floaty and imprecise, to completely broken. Riding the horsie fucking sucks. The rhythm minigames are ripping off Guitar Hero. What the heck is wrong with you Nintendo?
Visually though, the game is a masterpiece of sucking dick. The graphics look like they blindfolded a dolphin and said "surf's up, dude" and threw him into a fuckin box of crayons. The game looks like gay play-doh. And guess what? There's no multiplayer. THERE'S. NO. MULTIPLAYER.
Ummm, zerooo.
As a follow-up to the NES hit, Zelda II: Link's Adventure, Nintendo wanted to approach this game with a more minimalist mentality. So on a shoestring budget of fourteen dollars, Timecube Miyazaki got drunk and made this game in a weekend. But accidentally, Nintendo shipped the game into stores, forcing Nintendo to enter bankruptcy.
So where do I start with a travesty like this? The controls range from floaty and imprecise, to completely broken. Riding the horsie fucking sucks. The rhythm minigames are ripping off Guitar Hero. What the heck is wrong with you Nintendo?
Visually though, the game is a masterpiece of sucking dick. The graphics look like they blindfolded a dolphin and said "surf's up, dude" and threw him into a fuckin box of crayons. The game looks like gay play-doh. And guess what? There's no multiplayer. THERE'S. NO. MULTIPLAYER.
Ummm, zerooo.