LMFAO oh god man this game.. I think what I want to say here is I think this game has been the vehicle for a take that's been developing in my mind ever since MGSV came out. I really don't think you can make a stimulating stealth game while it holds so many qualities of your average triple A open world game. Like okay.. The environments are nice. Graphics are good, okay! But I don't know, man if I wanted to just chill and look at nice landscapes I would look at paintings because you know a lot of painters tend to do weirder shit than whatever the average "open world environmental!!" game offers!

When exploring the world, does anything really go on when you do it? Oh yeah you find supplies, maybe a note or two about how the radiation is so spicy or a weird Easter egg that involves those weird screen blur/shakes that metro loves to do. I'm sorry but this game is so fucking boring and not in a meditating way of a Tarkovsky film, so don't you fucking there try to tell me that! I found the gameplay to be intensely vapid. Maybe this is just nostalgia speaking but I felt like the stealth in the past Metro games were more intense, it required more wits and patience than whatever the fuck is going on here! Or at least it held the illusion of these feelings with just great level design. None of that is in this game!

By the way, I never finished this game. After so many replays and attempts to see the ending, I just couldn't be fucked! All the banter between chapters was neat on the first playthrough but it gets old when you're trying to replay the game. This is the only metro game in the series where I couldn't bother to finish, so maybe that'll mean something to you.

Anyways, here is a list of stealth games with open world elements that I think just get so so so wrong.
MGSV, Metro Exodus, Deathloop (Fuck you).

The only one that gets it right is Hitman because it's not just an empty open world that sometimes has a weird guy/monster and ammo! It's an alive world, the motherfuckers are constantly doing shit, there's so much to do in that fucking beast of a game! But whatever, this ain't a hitman review but god damn if you like stealth games just fucking play that! It's really that simple!

Reviewed on Feb 12, 2023


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