I've played so many shooters this past year that sometimes I forget them right when I finish playing them. Thank God for a game tracker or I would never be able to remember if I beat Phalanx or not, let alone anything specific in the game itself. My criteria from now on for judging a shooter is, at the very least, the final boss has to be cool. All you have to do is make me remember your final boss. This game? Well, I suppose it's a little better than the last, and most of the bosses and baddies are like cool anime mechs. What I thought was going to be the final boss, which was just a brain alien encased in a weird mask thing encased in a tank, was an okay fight, until in fact the very last boss was another huge mech. I was ready to be disappointed until I realized the fight takes place on the moon, with the view of earth in the background, and the boss saying "I'll kill you!" every time he fires his superweapon. And I mean, yeah, I'll remember that for a while. Good on you, Soldier Blade.

I really shouldn't have been so hard on R-Type III in retrospect, since that was maybe only the third shooter or so I had played back then. I still shake my own head at my past ignorance. Buuuuuuh, I said in that review like a fool, like a complete imbecile, what do I write about for R-Type III, the screen scrolls and your little shootey ship goes bang bang on the other little ships. Meanwhile I had just gotten done beating the coolest shooter final boss of all time, a Venus flytrap alien beast with six arms prying itself out of an interdimensional tear in one last effort to kill you. Fuckin idiot, Garrett. What's the matter with you? Stupid asshole.