Running with Scissors tries its hand at a linear campaign. I suppose I shouldn't be too surprised to see a cheap DLC add-on take a more focused, directed approach like this, but all it really does is highlight how Postal 2's combat and level-design wasn't made for or suit that kind of structure. With the open-world having been completely stripped away you're funneled into a string of segments that either have you blasting your way through corridor-shooter levels or killing X number of something (usually animals or zombies) before being able to move on. While the former is definitely more entertaining than the latter, neither are particularly fun or exciting. When the content isn't outright dull it's frustrating instead, shining a big ol' spotlight on the inconsistencies in weapon damage and enemy power. Why is it I can take out the little demon Gary Colemans faster by throwing scissors at them than using an automatic machine gun?

This change in format also forces RWS to engage in a larger amount of scripted storytelling, set pieces, and concocting of their own jokes. Most of my chuckles in the main offering came from however I chose to amuse myself with the tools I had at my disposal. Without the same range of freedom and flexibility at your fingertips here though, they're left trying to mine laughter from the stuff going down in the cutscenes, and let me tell you none of it is terribly funny. A lot of the material is recycled gags (Haha, terrorists and protestors! Satire! LOL!) and gratuitous profanity usage, so I guess I'm expected to be rolling on the floor over how much more absurd and over-the-top everything is now. This expansion marks the point where the franchise first made a heavy push into the hyper-ridiculous territory that would more or less define the property moving forward. I may not be guffawing, but we do get a few noteworthy qualities out of it. Primarily the Dude's hallucination sequences where his prior head trauma causes him to slip into a nightmarish version of reality, which I think might be the devs poking fun at Silent Hill. Whatever the case, it shows the studio has the potential to create a strong horror title visually should they ever decide to step back from the Postal brand for a second.

It's a shame this isn't better, because it's actually a big part of the property's history and lore, making it kind of essential to get the full picture. Apocalypse Weekend​ played a huge role in shaping the tone of the series and is also the source of that "pigeon mission" meme the fanbase constantly references (for some reason). Unfortunately, it feels about the same as your average crappy, low-budget 2000s era indie FPS. The particular weak points being an overly long and difficult escape from a U.S. military prison/nuclear silo that requires quite a bit of save scumming and one of the most dreadfully loathsome final bosses I've ever faced. I also experienced multiple crashes to desktop, which never happened to me during my playthrough of the base game. Oh well, at least when I exit to the main menu there's a sexy chick in a thong there now. So that's nice.

4/10

Reviewed on Mar 17, 2024


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