I have never understood Fortnite.

I get why people love it so much. My siblings, god bless their hearts, fell in love with this thing a year ago, so I've played with them a few times and seen the dances they bought for their characters and the skins they've unlocked. And I get the appeal of that. I don't get the appeal of the game itself.

I like the individual aspects on display. The respawn mechanic would be a great idea in a game with smaller maps and more to do (See: The Finals). The little side-quests and distractions are cute and add a lot of flavor to what is otherwise a pretty bland experience. The art style is very well-developed, and each area on the map is distinct enough to serve as a fun little playground on its own. I love the shrinking circle mechanic—again, give me smaller maps, and I'll appreciate it more.

Put all of those aspects together, though, and... I don't know, it just feels kind of unfocused? There are certainly rounds where everything clicks into place, and there's a high-voltage rush to the finish line that permeates through every shot fired. But there are twice as many rounds where over half the time you spend playing is dicking around, waiting for conflict to happen. And then conflict does happen; everybody dies, game over, and the next round is the exact same fucking thing. Ad nauseam. The last five minutes of those rounds are suuuper fun, if you ignore the fact that everything before them was just whatever.

As someone who tried to get into Fortnite to play with my siblings, I also have to say that I'm not a fan of the bots. Listen, I loved playing botmatches on Unreal Tournament 3 and TimeSplitters Future Perfect back then. The thing is, I chose to have those experiences. I was given an option. It's called an option, a fucking option. If you want newer players to play around with bots so they get used to the game, encourage that. Please, don't hoist your 10 IQ, braindead bots on the siblings of those who just want to connect with their family. It's not fun, and it makes me appreciate your game less because it shows you have absolutely no confidence in giving me any choice. Also, what if I wanted to play with bots more often after I escaped the bot gulag? Why is it "We add bots to fill a lobby sometimes" and not, "Hey, if you wanted to play exclusively with bots, there's a mode for that"? You might say that Fortnite is targeting a much younger audience than Unreal or TimeSplitters, to which I have to respond that I played both as a child.

I don't know. I guess I like this game? But I don't love it. I can tell it's the sort of thing that's more fun after you've poured a ton of time into it on your own. The battle passes in this weren't influential enough for every multiplayer game following its smashing success to have one for no reason. But I dunno; I just don't feel like it. It doesn't click with me, and that's a real shame.