I had a friend once. A man I met under inauspicious circumstances. It was a trying time in my life, and at first, to be honest, I didn't trust him. An ally of necessity, not of my choosing. But if I can credit anyone with getting me through those hard times, it was him. Other acquaintances came and went, I couldn't tell if my ex was trying to help me or just using me, my second most constant companion kept getting kidnapped. But whenever I needed him, my friend was there, with a jaunty greeting and a cool new shotgun to sell me.
I lost that friend a long time ago. But recently, I've been seeing something wearing his face.
This new... "Merchant" has none of my friend's warmth or charisma. He has an oily, sneaky quality that some people seem to think is apropos. Are we really at the point of pretending Resident Evil, of all series, is too good for camp? Whatever happened to showmanship? My friend set the tone for the entire game, such was his force of personality. The only lasting impression I get from this wet blanket is of deafening, aching lack.
Also, the guy never shuts the hell up up. Who was it that decided vendor NPCs don't get enough voice lines in video games? Who decided they should periodically nag you about how long you're taking while you browse their wares? (No, seriously, what's patient zero? It's a very similar vibe to how all the companions complain every time you change your party composition in Baldur's Gate 3. Unpopular opinion apparently, but I like it when games don't make characters constantly whine at you for engaging in basic, necessary gameplay functions that should barely even be diegetic.)
When I was a child, a kind girl named Navi literally just said "hey" or "listen" about once every fifteen minutes if you were wandering around somewhere other than the critical path and she was absolutely reviled, pilloried and stoned for at least a real world ass decade. Just for being very occasionally heard. Just for trying to help. But this pod person, this soulless imposter, this fucking Cockney FRAUD stands here and belittles me every fifteen seconds for sitting in a pause menu pondering how I should spend my money in a game where scarcity of resources is a core mechanic, and gamers are silent??? The real Merchant was more than just a funny meme man, sir. He was a CONSUMMATE. CUSTOMER SERVICE. PROFESSIONAL. You really wanna bring this kind of naked rudeness with your only fucking customer? You think you've established that kind of rapport with me? You bring shame on his house.
And to all the sycophants and enablers, who settled for less and let this character assassination pass? History will remember your cowardice.
Anyway apart from that it's a great game! I was really worried about how it would sort of interact with the original in the cultural memory but I think we got basically the best case scenario, where it's a different enough beast that both versions have lasting creative value. It's not as replayable, I think--I always play a new Resident Evil early in the year when it comes out and then replay that October, but I got bored and went back to Armored Core during my RE4make replay--but the action just feels so good and Ashley is much more of a character.
I lost that friend a long time ago. But recently, I've been seeing something wearing his face.
This new... "Merchant" has none of my friend's warmth or charisma. He has an oily, sneaky quality that some people seem to think is apropos. Are we really at the point of pretending Resident Evil, of all series, is too good for camp? Whatever happened to showmanship? My friend set the tone for the entire game, such was his force of personality. The only lasting impression I get from this wet blanket is of deafening, aching lack.
Also, the guy never shuts the hell up up. Who was it that decided vendor NPCs don't get enough voice lines in video games? Who decided they should periodically nag you about how long you're taking while you browse their wares? (No, seriously, what's patient zero? It's a very similar vibe to how all the companions complain every time you change your party composition in Baldur's Gate 3. Unpopular opinion apparently, but I like it when games don't make characters constantly whine at you for engaging in basic, necessary gameplay functions that should barely even be diegetic.)
When I was a child, a kind girl named Navi literally just said "hey" or "listen" about once every fifteen minutes if you were wandering around somewhere other than the critical path and she was absolutely reviled, pilloried and stoned for at least a real world ass decade. Just for being very occasionally heard. Just for trying to help. But this pod person, this soulless imposter, this fucking Cockney FRAUD stands here and belittles me every fifteen seconds for sitting in a pause menu pondering how I should spend my money in a game where scarcity of resources is a core mechanic, and gamers are silent??? The real Merchant was more than just a funny meme man, sir. He was a CONSUMMATE. CUSTOMER SERVICE. PROFESSIONAL. You really wanna bring this kind of naked rudeness with your only fucking customer? You think you've established that kind of rapport with me? You bring shame on his house.
And to all the sycophants and enablers, who settled for less and let this character assassination pass? History will remember your cowardice.
Anyway apart from that it's a great game! I was really worried about how it would sort of interact with the original in the cultural memory but I think we got basically the best case scenario, where it's a different enough beast that both versions have lasting creative value. It's not as replayable, I think--I always play a new Resident Evil early in the year when it comes out and then replay that October, but I got bored and went back to Armored Core during my RE4make replay--but the action just feels so good and Ashley is much more of a character.