This review contains spoilers
I’ve made no secret in the past about my disdain for Undertale. I’ve mentioned it in various reviews, and even written two full-length essays detailing my problems with the game. But just like George Lucas before me, I realize I may have gone too far in some places.
Back in 2019 or so, I became aware of the JRPG genre at large. I’d played a couple Mario RPGs before and I knew about Pokémon, but this was an entirely new world for me. There were so many brilliant stories, beautiful worlds, and complex systems to explore, and I loved every bit of them. Since I also had an interest in game design, I decided I wanted to make a JRPG of my own one day, a goal that I still hope to eventually achieve.
However, I was stuck on how to make my game stand out, so I turned to JRPG forums for some helpful advice. This, of course, was a major mistake on my part, as I soon encountered all forms of libel against my favorite games, as well as other ones I thought looked cool. I wasn’t entirely sure what to make of it, or what information I should and shouldn’t believe, and became insecure about my tastes as a result.
Around the same time, I finally got around to playing the beloved indie darling Undertale. It was fine, but I didn’t care for it as much as most people did. There was one line that stuck with me from the end of the genocide run, though: “HP. ATK. DEF. GOLD. EXP. LV. Every time a number increases, that feeling... That's me.” The more I thought about that line, the more the thought occurred to me: this was a game made to deliberately mock the genre I loved, for the people who mocked that genre. It made too much sense. Why else would the gameplay be seemingly made for people who hated turn-based RPGs? Surely that line couldn’t be an accident, right?
Apparently, I was the only one who thought so, because everywhere I looked there was nothing but unending praise for Undertale. It was profound, it was original, it was a work of art and if you disagreed then clearly you were the problem. And as someone who disagreed, I took the only natural course of action and decided to be a problem. I insulted people who enjoyed the game, dismissed anything it might have done well, and blamed any problems with the JRPG genre on the fact that “clearly, indie developers aren’t making anything better because they’re too busy trying to copy Undertale”. Yes, it made no sense, but I didn’t care. I thought I was in the right. I thought I was justified.
But now that I’ve had the chance to talk to some people, I realize how dumb and selfish I’ve sounded. Even if Undertale didn’t work for me, there are tons of people out there it clearly did work for, and that’s great. Plus, a lot of those people still love other JRPGs, so maybe Undertale wasn’t made specifically for people who hate the genre. Maybe that line was just an accident; After all, game development is a tough process, and everyone’s bound to make mistakes. But that doesn’t matter. What does matter is that I used my own insecurities as an excuse to hurt other people, and that’s never okay. So to anyone out there reading this that I hurt with what I did or said: I’m sorry. I don’t need any kind of forgiveness for my actions. The only person who has to forgive me is myself, because there’s nothing wrong with me enjoying the games I love.
I still want to finish my game one day, but I can’t do it out of spite. I have to do it out of passion, like I’m sure Toby Fox did when he made Undertale. So, thanks, Toby. You helped me find a better route through life. Here’s hoping you live yours in the best way possible, and good luck with Deltarune.
Back in 2019 or so, I became aware of the JRPG genre at large. I’d played a couple Mario RPGs before and I knew about Pokémon, but this was an entirely new world for me. There were so many brilliant stories, beautiful worlds, and complex systems to explore, and I loved every bit of them. Since I also had an interest in game design, I decided I wanted to make a JRPG of my own one day, a goal that I still hope to eventually achieve.
However, I was stuck on how to make my game stand out, so I turned to JRPG forums for some helpful advice. This, of course, was a major mistake on my part, as I soon encountered all forms of libel against my favorite games, as well as other ones I thought looked cool. I wasn’t entirely sure what to make of it, or what information I should and shouldn’t believe, and became insecure about my tastes as a result.
Around the same time, I finally got around to playing the beloved indie darling Undertale. It was fine, but I didn’t care for it as much as most people did. There was one line that stuck with me from the end of the genocide run, though: “HP. ATK. DEF. GOLD. EXP. LV. Every time a number increases, that feeling... That's me.” The more I thought about that line, the more the thought occurred to me: this was a game made to deliberately mock the genre I loved, for the people who mocked that genre. It made too much sense. Why else would the gameplay be seemingly made for people who hated turn-based RPGs? Surely that line couldn’t be an accident, right?
Apparently, I was the only one who thought so, because everywhere I looked there was nothing but unending praise for Undertale. It was profound, it was original, it was a work of art and if you disagreed then clearly you were the problem. And as someone who disagreed, I took the only natural course of action and decided to be a problem. I insulted people who enjoyed the game, dismissed anything it might have done well, and blamed any problems with the JRPG genre on the fact that “clearly, indie developers aren’t making anything better because they’re too busy trying to copy Undertale”. Yes, it made no sense, but I didn’t care. I thought I was in the right. I thought I was justified.
But now that I’ve had the chance to talk to some people, I realize how dumb and selfish I’ve sounded. Even if Undertale didn’t work for me, there are tons of people out there it clearly did work for, and that’s great. Plus, a lot of those people still love other JRPGs, so maybe Undertale wasn’t made specifically for people who hate the genre. Maybe that line was just an accident; After all, game development is a tough process, and everyone’s bound to make mistakes. But that doesn’t matter. What does matter is that I used my own insecurities as an excuse to hurt other people, and that’s never okay. So to anyone out there reading this that I hurt with what I did or said: I’m sorry. I don’t need any kind of forgiveness for my actions. The only person who has to forgive me is myself, because there’s nothing wrong with me enjoying the games I love.
I still want to finish my game one day, but I can’t do it out of spite. I have to do it out of passion, like I’m sure Toby Fox did when he made Undertale. So, thanks, Toby. You helped me find a better route through life. Here’s hoping you live yours in the best way possible, and good luck with Deltarune.