“So let there be no way back. From that temptation I sunder us. No more shall man have wings to bear him to paradise. Henceforth, he shall walk.”

To truly convey what Final Fantasy XIV means to me, I think I have to start with this quote. From my favorite scene not just in this game, in all of storytelling. Growing up as I did, in the Catholic church, I’ve always been very intimate with whenever allusions to Christianity are present in my favorite stories. I’ve known the story of the Garden of Eden and how mankind was cast out of Heaven since a young age. Separate from that, as I’ve gotten older it's felt that it must be nearly impossible for me to become happy. I couldn’t make it after all that happened, already too late, maybe there was some point in my past where I still could have been in time, but when would that have been? 'Let there be no way back,' to what? To a life that seems so much better than the present. Withdrawing into halcyon days, loving only the past, is to repeat the same mistakes in a circle. So Hydaelyn refuses to recreate Utopia, never again shall happiness be man’s birthright. Yet, Endwalker goes beyond this idea of original sin and the fall with what she says after. Anywhere can be paradise.

This expansion included what I found to be some fairly refreshing gameplay implementations in the wider context of XIV. More unique things they did with the engine helped me be truly immersed, with a particular reference to one of the most iconic sequences in another of my favorite franchises. One or two things that they tried were a real slog when they came up, but it hit far more than it missed. I especially liked taking any chance to just have other characters following me around and getting all their dialogue for the particular area or environment we were in. Shadowbringers already had my favorite cast basically of all time but this added layer was such a dream come true. Praising Endwalker as I am for its experimentation and unique additions, there is the sense that there’s something missing in terms of breadth of content compared to previous entries. Areas don’t have quite the same purposefulness behind every design decision, they can end up feeling quite empty for being so vast. This doesn’t do anything to detract for me because really I by now I see 6.0 and 5.x as this really inseparable duology. Endwalker builds perfectly off of everything Shadowbringers established and executed. You could almost say the last expansion felt more like the real ending to everything and this is a very extensive epilogue. Appropriate, something that continues even after what you would suppose is the end. That said, the climaxes are by far the most satisfying to me in all of the game’s history. A perfection of the general XIV formula and arc structure, especially with the incorporation of trials.

In general, this simply had all the greatest payoffs I’ve experienced from any story in my life. Over 10 years in the making. XIV is so important to me as well not just because of what the massive lifetime achievement of its storytelling means on its own, but the way it truly stands on the backs of giants. Every conflict, every question, multitudes of concepts, all end up reflecting in some way or another on Final Fantasy’s profound ethos as a franchise. It does so in ways I could have never dreamed of. Even engaging in such a brilliant conversation with what used to be my favorite game before this, Final Fantasy VII. Answering the themes and questions of such past entries, but with shockingly even greater clarity of thought and message. Which isn’t to discredit the accomplishments of older games. Without a doubt cements this series as my top 1 franchise in gaming.

XIV by the end of its primary story arc taps into some sensitive topics philosophically. I don’t know if I can say I really believe in the notion that bad days make the good times better, but that’s also not what I think it’s really trying to say. I think that, as a natural course, if you’re going to be alive, to live, that means accepting certain things. Just being human, inherently, comes with its baggage. I think the game came at the perfect time in my life when I myself was really coming into a new outlook on what meaning my life had. In the past, as recently as early this year, I really did everything to avoid having to be in pain or suffer. I thought that I was justified and that no one should at all be allowed to reproach me for certain actions I took. Making everything about how much I was suffering. To cut away at the bad parts, the disagreeable things, blot out the things I can’t stand and dislike. To only feel positive emotions, drink only from the clean water, look only at what I want to, it was really an unsustainable behavior. If I wanted to be human, it was totally antithetical. The good with the bad, the envy, anxiety, the desperation, I would love it all, now and forever.

"The transience of the here and now, that fleeting moment I so adored-I would long to make its miracle eternal. A childish notion, true, but one I could not discard; rather, knowing it was a dream never to be fulfilled, my thirst for it refused to ever fade.”