Tecmo Knight

Tecmo Knight

releases on TBD

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Tecmo Knight

releases on TBD

The protagonist Tecmo Knight has the assistance of "Smokeman" and "Tiger". Pressing the "change" button allows Tecmo Knight to switch between the two. Smokeman uses powerful punches and kicks against enemies while Tecmo Knight rides him. While riding the tiger, Tecmo Knight has the use of a spiked ball and chain less powerful than Smokeman's attacks, but with greater range. When collecting the special dragon skull that randomly appears after defeating an enemy, the Tecmo Knight will summon the most powerful creature to ride on in the game: the Flying Dragon. Tecmo Knight is immune to attack while riding Flying Dragon, whose breath kills any monster in the game instantly, including the stage-end bosses. Using the "jump and attack" maneuver, Tecmo Knight can bound Smokeman or the tiger onto enemies and pummel them. Sometimes, if Tecmo Knight runs low on life, a blow by a weak monster will kill only Smokeman or the tiger, leaving Tecmo Knight to fend for himself with a very weak short-ranged attack. It is extremely hard for him to survive at this point. All bosses in the game appear in "pairs" making it harder for a single player to corner them. The only exception is the last boss. Currently, there are two "extra life" bonus skulls known to exist in the game. Players can also utilize "props" like bombs and stone-rollers placed around the map to their advantage. Much like the 1988 arcade beat 'em up Ninja Gaiden, Tecmo Knight is hard for beginners, because it requires more patience than button-pounding. Like Ninja Gaiden, the game features a rather disturbing continue screen, where Tecmo Knight is about to be swallowed by an unseen monster. If the player does not continue before the 10 second countdown ends, Tecmo Knight is heard screaming as the monster swallows him. Afterwards, the screen will black out, and a monster will tear through the screen shouting "NO FUTURE!", along with "Game Over" appearing under the monster.


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Gnarly medieval SPLATTERHOUSE-vibe brawler where the player is a normal-sized person controlling a giant barbarian^ by riding around on his back. You fight a truly horrifying menagerie of gross mythical beasts by punching them until their faces bleed and their heads pop off, or you can jump on their backs and just pound their whole shit in, too. The combat is simple (and quickly boring) and most of the variation comes from the interactive environments and using them to wipe out the sometimes overwhelming hordes of enemies. Screwing that stuff up means you can get snowed under pretty quick, and you only have two lives before continuing which, fatally, sends you back to a checkpoint rather that reviving you on the spot, making progressing through the game about ten times more annoying than it needs to be. And that's a shame, because this is definitely the type of game you want to keep playing to see what kind of goopy weirdo is around the next corner, and what it looks like when you ruin his entire situation until his head falls off.

^You can also switch to riding around on a tiger that throws a RYGAR-style chain-pizza but it's not as good. And also there's some super dragon form I couldn't figure out how to unlock. Twenty-foot tall barbarian was good enough.

The final boss is a big fat skin-colored Satan who you beat by deflating his giant pulsating nutsack that's resting on the floor and then doing gymnastics on one of his big horns until it explodes off. 2.5 stars.