No matter if this series is ironic or sincere, you need to have a specific kind of fucked-up-ness (like the "Euphoric Brothers") to develop, publish, charge 5 bucks for the bare minimum viable "product" of a mascot horror game where neither the mascots nor the settings don't make sense at all in the grand scheme of things (It's a Kindergarten, but the architect really must have loved them sterile SCP-ass laboratories) and where every facet of the game is a rush job, like the models. A brain blender of a game, uninspired and braindead. Bizarre, only for the MatPats of the world to grossly consume it's bare intestines for other content.
TL;DR
When the Josh be Jumboin, numba 2
TL;DR
When the Josh be Jumboin, numba 2
In every single waking hour of the days that make up the gregorian calendar, I think to myself about how much I absolutely detest the woefully pathetic image of your existence.
If every atom within every universe inside every multiverse on the planes of reality within every timeline were accounted for, their paltry numbers wouldn't be enough to fill a single angstrom of the colossal monument that is my hatred for the knowledge that your presence is within any of my six senses. A single syllable of your title brings about a swift malevolent annihilation of which the likes no one has ever seen or heard of before in reality or in legend.
For you, mild resentment.
If every atom within every universe inside every multiverse on the planes of reality within every timeline were accounted for, their paltry numbers wouldn't be enough to fill a single angstrom of the colossal monument that is my hatred for the knowledge that your presence is within any of my six senses. A single syllable of your title brings about a swift malevolent annihilation of which the likes no one has ever seen or heard of before in reality or in legend.
For you, mild resentment.
These aren't getting better.
The first one barely worked just for the sole reason of being short. A stupidly annoying drone mechanic, an egghunt puzzle which is just as bad, and the bird thing, which is the only decent idea in the game (but the way that scene is built is still some atrocious game design). That's all there is, it's very short. This one though is three times longer, and has three times as many opportunities to fuck up which it does without fail.
You can skip at least 2 parts ("puzzles"?) in this game because of how broken it is. The whole classroom part is very awkward and the logic in it is very questionable. There is an overlong parkour sequence, but the controls are not platforming friendly, to put it lightly, so it turns into actual hell. The graphics settings are weird as well, my computer can't handle the hyporrealistic graphiscs this game has, so I had everything on medium or low. But little did I know, the "lighting quality" setting is actually "lighting amount", if it's put on "low" you can't see some things, including one of the buttons you need to complete a puzzle. Got me stuck for 10 minutes. The cannons puzzle is agonizingly slow and too simple to feel anything but boredom. But the fact that there are cannons all over the place is a nice touch, made me laugh. Also why is there an underground liminal apartment building under a daycare? I can accept the lab where clay-people are made and turned into local mascots (Spy Kids, anyone?), but come on that thing is there just because kids like liminal spaces. Also the fucking Squid/Snail game thing. This whole game is just a bunch of roblox maps put together.
Uh. Why am I ranting over a game made for small children? I don't know. I just haven't played a game this bad in a long time.
The one thing I actually liked is something I somehow skipped over during my playthrough and that is that huge worm creature you can see halfway through the game. No idea what it is but it's pretty unnerving.
So, are kids these days really into genetic experiments on humans? And I thought the fnaf fascination was weird.
The first one barely worked just for the sole reason of being short. A stupidly annoying drone mechanic, an egghunt puzzle which is just as bad, and the bird thing, which is the only decent idea in the game (but the way that scene is built is still some atrocious game design). That's all there is, it's very short. This one though is three times longer, and has three times as many opportunities to fuck up which it does without fail.
You can skip at least 2 parts ("puzzles"?) in this game because of how broken it is. The whole classroom part is very awkward and the logic in it is very questionable. There is an overlong parkour sequence, but the controls are not platforming friendly, to put it lightly, so it turns into actual hell. The graphics settings are weird as well, my computer can't handle the hyporrealistic graphiscs this game has, so I had everything on medium or low. But little did I know, the "lighting quality" setting is actually "lighting amount", if it's put on "low" you can't see some things, including one of the buttons you need to complete a puzzle. Got me stuck for 10 minutes. The cannons puzzle is agonizingly slow and too simple to feel anything but boredom. But the fact that there are cannons all over the place is a nice touch, made me laugh. Also why is there an underground liminal apartment building under a daycare? I can accept the lab where clay-people are made and turned into local mascots (Spy Kids, anyone?), but come on that thing is there just because kids like liminal spaces. Also the fucking Squid/Snail game thing. This whole game is just a bunch of roblox maps put together.
Uh. Why am I ranting over a game made for small children? I don't know. I just haven't played a game this bad in a long time.
The one thing I actually liked is something I somehow skipped over during my playthrough and that is that huge worm creature you can see halfway through the game. No idea what it is but it's pretty unnerving.
So, are kids these days really into genetic experiments on humans? And I thought the fnaf fascination was weird.
Jesus Fucking Christ that was so bad I fucking hate my life. The cacophony of sound was unbearable this time, specially since it's x2 times the lenght of the original, and now the game also screams and shouts and laughs at you with honest to god one of the worst voice acting I have ever heard on my life. Thottie Banban could get it tho.
I had to restart multiple times because of the sheer wailling on my headphones preventing me from learning how to play and it actually crashed once when I was doing a puzzle. Feels profoundly more caucasian than the previous game, somehow.
A small sample of what I had to go through
I had to restart multiple times because of the sheer wailling on my headphones preventing me from learning how to play and it actually crashed once when I was doing a puzzle. Feels profoundly more caucasian than the previous game, somehow.
A small sample of what I had to go through
In comparison to the first game this was actually pretty decent, but by no means was it great. It was very strange, but I appreciate its ambition and attempt to have more of a story. It was also quite scary and I quite like the puzzles. However I think this game mainly suffers from me having experienced it on mobile with very clunky controls. Still I do think this game gets a bit to much hate, maybe for its quirkiness, but sometimes I like quirky horror games, so I could just be different. I will probably play the 3rd one when it comes to mobile, I just hope they don’t milk this series to much