excuse me if this gets more rambly than usual. i emerged only moments ago from a 4-hour long crash team coma, cuz i need to tell y'all something: i was wrong. or perhaps, society was wrong. society was wrong to clockwork-orange forcefeed us mario-flavored drivel and tell us that it was the best this genre had to offer. i come to you all tonight to tell you that i have seen the face of the god of kart racing and it was spiky and orange.

if i had to sum up what makes ctr so much better than the Big N's blue-shell-blaster-dick-smasher flagship racer (rip f-zero) in 2 words, i would say "skill ceiling". the fact of the matter is that high-level mario kart gameplay is fucking b o r i n g. in the most mechanically expressive entry (which i would argue is mario kart ds), you are still getting a party game. the best player isn't always "supposed" to win. and while that may be great in those party settings, i don't go to parties. i don't even have a social life. and there's not enough diversity in mario kart handling OR content-wise to warrant single-player sessions past the 30 minute mark. enter this godsend of a racer and its immaculate drifting. kart racers live or die by their drift, and this is as good as it gets. my experience playing this game tonight could be boiled down to a semi-orgasmic trance of rhythmically tapping the bumpers and rocking the d-pad on my controller. there's no "saving up" boost here, you will use it when the game gives it to you or you won't get it at all. this timing-heavy approach is such a refreshing change from mario kart's antiquated bullshit. the other hallmark of the genre is power-ups. i'll be frank: i hate power-ups. i want nothing more than to enter my little vehicle trance and make it dance around my fellow racers. while i am docking a star for putting power-ups in an otherwise flawless game, i will give it all the credit it deserves for allowing me to dodge (or otherwise negate) them with intuitive maneuvers. no lightning bolt bullshit here.

there's still ONE thing i prefer in the marioid, and that's visuals and music. i've never been a fan of crash bandicoot's 90s irreverent boy humor cartoon shit. it's what kept me from playing this game despite everything good i heard about it. for what its worth, i think the secondary crash characters are very cute - big titty anime eyes bandicoot girl is a certified banger design - and the tracks, while not as aesthetically pleasing, feature more clever design that that of the mk. these are PALTRY complaints in the face of how good this game simply feels to control. my fingers are cumming, dawg. if you haven't already, go right now and buy/download/boot up/whatever a copy of this and play it like your life depends on it. my words cannot begin to do justice to its awesomeness.

LONG LIVE CRASH BANDICOOT!

love roughplaying, couldnot resist!!!!!...Had To Join The "BadgeBoys", sight was too arresting... yepp, bigchunguscheetah from my fayvoritest movie Zootopositivia was there As You Know! funnyfluffy bellyboy most certainly made me feel positively positivized to try being PariahElf PoliceMan and Do The Needful (SWAT4roughplay) with all Your favorite Justin.tv streamers involved in the act.......Mmmmmm........Delicacies........what LawfulGood tradeschool gives me ThisProfession? do local ElderScroll reading mothpriest scholarS know how I can begin to Catch Em All??? please, inform me in the commentS below, must begin Doing The Needful at once!!! will buy both versions and link cable to make sure TheDeeds is done, not even cute little "Miu" potentially hiding under any silt striders will be able to evade being brought back to his rightful place in a plantation, someone needs to pick up that saltrice after all, who else is gonna do that, elven wizards able to summon daedric servants??? no no...Imperial Law says AllGood, we play "by the book" (we read them after all). I am sorry, nomore of this "distractory fanfiction", mosts importantest GamerMonomyth deeds must be done back in teh mainlaind, Destroying Teh TribunaL Once 4 ALL!!!

PS:so sorry, custom destruction spells will cease, might cause "A Fire!", we 'PeeCee' gamers don't like to dance close to it anyhow. DissidentGamer with soul sickness has been completely&utterly truthD by our benevolent Temple Ordinators, many mature adult DenseTextS and HBO shows by CDProjektReddit cOnsumd completely complaint free from now on, equal parts engaged&entertained....

There's gotta be some insane Mandela effect at play here because I do not remember the Laser Ball enemy being anywhere in this dog gone world. Now the rest, I do remember! Like the first day of school. But... less daunting! I don't know how many times they can reinvent the pink ball, but apparently enough. The wheel has stopped, we are gathered today to celebrate the creativity bankruptcy of the once goat Kirb. A great mind once said "You couldn't hit a barn-sized lightning rod, Kracko!" That burn was free of charge DAMN, and here we find Kracko again... This is far from a coincidence. Ong? Just like that? We have so many gamemodes? It plays and looks better than its prehistoric version it's building on... if you are born in the 80s you are GAY and very OLD 🤓 ahah surely none of the readers are, that would be too silly.

We are used to remakes that remove content for no convincing reason, but in Kirby we trust? Wazzat? Stylus minigames??! GYAAAAAAAT!!! The presentation also includes new FMV cutscenes, as you've probably.. noticed... if you played the game. They are decent, yeah. Lil birbs. Marx got me fuh'd up though aint gonna lie. Is it fine spoiling shit? Eh, you'll figure it out. Look at blud's name. All being said, Milky Way Wishes still remains the goat. Anything that plays like Subspace Emissary knows what it's doing. I used to play the Arena a lot with my brother... happy childhood. We never really beat the True Arena. And by "really" I mean "yeah we barely made a dent in that thing. Absolutely fucked it up. I'm so sorry". I have to say, the bosses look... interesting... openAI draw them naked

While we're on a peak spree, chatgpt cook this top review, come up with a new gamemode and come up with a Saul Goodman type scheme to settle my student debt. Just kidding, I'm french. AH! Joke's on me. Jeez Louise, you can't go wrong with a Meta Knight gamemode. Well, NiDL's take was not much for acclaim, but this one is very cool. You are a heck of an entertainer, Sir Meta 😎 his strongest soldiers would agree 💪 no moaaaar FORTNITE no moaaar 19 DOLLARS MACH TORNADO. That's about the gist of it. But sir... A second gamemode has hit the remake??! Yeah, Dedede still wants that smoke, huh. It's like the extra mode in Dream's Land, putting the epic in extra epic!

Galacta Knight AND Masked Dedede? Iconic reccuring enemies back to back! Everybody gangsta until the japanese king dons the luchador mask. The "completely new" bosses are decisively nuts when you dunno better. Nothing has changed about any of them I don't think, but they're not recent graduates so of course their life has come to a stop. Kabula notwithstanding, she deserved to be back in the spotlight ❤️ This is also the grand starring role of Bandana Waddle Dee. I beat bro's ass. Then Dedede's. Sure happened. There is kind of a nihilistic undertone to that whole ending sequence. The antagonist always loses... we will never see his likes enslave his citizens like that again 😢

Numerous other additions! World Premiere! Just a droplet in the grand scheme of Nova's great plan. New Arena just dropped, with NPCs getting their fill. Don't you think Kirby might be too violent a game, sometimes? Eheh surely not, it's not like there is a sub-game where we destroy the pla- there is a sub-game where we destroy the planet. Oh wow! Nothing new ahah. Who knows whether they updated Capsule J because my boy deserves this much or to avoid copyright infringement. A perplexing paradox... But of course, it dont mean none in the judging eyes of the uncultured. I must admit, I scarcely noticed it. And I seldom played the sub-games, so don't ask me about those! Let me be silly doin main game activity

After years of drift towards third-person action, survival horror finally returns to its roots: dunking your entire arm into every single trashcan you can find and showing disobedient vending machines and lockers the righteous fury of your boot heel.

Thank God the indie market is so robust these days, because the increasing homogenization of the modern big budget game and shrinking genre space therein means you wouldn't get proper survival horror otherwise. Crow Country and others like Signalis have been filling that void, but despite clearly playing to the charm of PlayStation era horror with its visuals - especially with its character models, which look as though they've been unearthed from an old Net Yaroze kit - Crow Country is no tired pastiche. It's safe rooms, puzzles, and resource management might harken to a design ethos that was at one point more commonplace, but these elements feel authentic and borne from a place of appreciation and understanding.

Nowhere is this more strongly felt than in the park's layout and the way in which the player navigates it. The amusement park theme allows for neatly defined areas with their own theming and unique attractions, with hidden passages, back rooms, cast tunnels, and a subterranean network serving as the connective tissue between each "land" in a way that feels appropriate for the setting while serving to make the park feel highly interconnected. Crow Country is great at providing a sense of space while conveying where the player should go and what to do next. I never felt lost or completely stumped by a puzzle and was consistently engaged and encouraged to revisit old locations to explore - the part of my brain that starts processing how I want to route my way through a game activated pretty early, and as far as I'm concerned, that's a sign that a survival horror game is living up to the promise of its genre.

The setting is also small. Crow Country is less Disneyland, more Santa's Village, so one way developer SFB Games succeeds in making repeated loops through the park threatening is by gradually introducing more enemies and traps to familiar locations. As the time of day progresses, rain and darkness further obscure the player's vision, and boobytrapped pick-ups begin to litter the map to prey on the sense of trust they've developed with their environment. I sprinted my way through the opening two hours, juked most enemies and picked up any crap I saw laying on the ground. By hour five, I was walking everywhere, stopping frequently, side-eyeing boxes of ammo, and finding that I actually had to conserve what I had due to the increased expectation that I shoot some damn "guests."

I also appreciate Crow Country for telling a complete and coherent story, something I think a lot of horror games have pushed away from. I think the Five Nights series has poisoned the genre and led a lot of other indie horror creators to believe a complex and intentionally vague narrative is the best way to ensure franchise longevity. Keep posing questions, provide no answers. I get it, sometimes it's best to let the audience fill in gaps, you don't want over-explain horror, but in the hands of a weak writer, the "unknown" can just be a euphemism for "nothing."

That's not to say Crow Country fails to raise any questions of its own, rather that in true PSX survival horror fashion, you're given all the clues you need to form the big picture through memos, context, and dialog. How well you do that is entirely dependent on how much you're paying attention, and whether you view Crow Country as being so cliched that its horror can be explained by way of Resident Evil and Silent Hill. I was extremely satisfied by the ending, which leaves just enough unanswered that you'll still have something to think of without feeling like you'll need to consult a YouTube series or read like, seven fucking books and play a dozen more games. An indie horror game with a conclusion that is both cogent and earned, thank christ.

So make the most of your Memorial Day weekend and bring the whole family down to Crow Country. Come ride our newest attraction: The Seven Seas, and discover new types of bacteria. Remember, vets and children under 6 get in free!

Crow Country Review

Gameplay:

Crow Country aims to bring back the nostalgic feel of the original survival horror greats, it aims to blend a few modern mechanics with the familiar atmosphere of games like the original Resident Evil, Silent Hill, Dino Crisis, ect. They even added in a classic tank control scheme for those of you who want the classic feel but I opted for the more modern controls myself. The gameplay basically revolves around exploring Crow Country which is a dilapidated amusement park with a dark history. You play as Mara Forest, and if youve played the inspirations you basically already know what to expect. Solving intricate puzzles, stand still to shoot combat against slow and nasty creatures (that you do not HAVE to kill of course since this is a survival horror), not knowing where to go or what to do (good or bad?), and "intense" sections of long backtracking. The game goes for an isometric view instead of the third and first person standard for modern horror games, but it does add free aiming and a camera you can move which adds a bit of a modern feel to this style of game.

I found myself keeping a notebook of all the things, codes, and notes that I found that I need to come back to which was fun, but the games puzzles are either halfway across the entire map from its solution leading to a bit of confusion on what is or isn't important for each puzzle or digital lock. If you keep a piece of paper on hand this probably wont be an issue but even still I was at a loss for a few of these moments for a while.

A few things the game could've improved is the map system. When you enter a room, the map only shows what room you are in. It wasn't a big deal of course, but I felt like it would be beneficial to have a map marker of your player and orientation to help with larger rooms and knowing which room you are heading towards. Again, its not a big deal I just have a poor sense of direction and my memory isn't amazing either so I'm sure someone else will probably have the whole map committed to memory by the time the game finishes.

Final notes, this game also doesn't do anything really new, I enjoyed my time playing it but it was mostly just familiar mechanics. You shouldn't expect a crazy mind-blowing, innovative game, instead expect a solid recreation of a game that could've came out in the 90s but with most of the clunk removed. The scares are also pretty low as well which is to be expected for a ps1 era game where the low poly groaning of monsters was scary back then but nowadays that is tame. This game focuses solely on the classic scares which is a good thing for some, but I wished it would take its style and make it truly horrifying by completely blindsiding you at moments with things you would never expect.


Graphics/Visuals:

The art direction in Crow Country is really mostly focusing on the nostalgic feel, it doesn't really blow anything out of the water of course, but it WAS super creative to have detailed environments while keeping the main characters as low poly as possible. It reminds me of PS1 games where the background was only a picture and the low poly 3d model would walk around it, yet they kept this same exact style while making those 2D envonments 3D, leading to a cool effect when moving your camera around. The abandoned amusement park is brought to life with eerie lighting, those detailed background textures, and a great visual style that enhances the experience for me. The creature designs can be very strange at times, mostly consisting of extremely mutated, bloody and grotesque things clambering towards you.

I'll remember the atmosphere of this game the longest as it is pretty memorable at times.

Story/Narrative:

The story of Crow Country is compelling, balancing eerie and comedic moments that kept me engaged, giving that nostalgic feel of old Resident Evil dialogue but doing so in a charming way. Having fun little things that the character says when you inspect something unimportant, or awkward interactions with NPCs you find. The story follows Mara Forest as she investigates the park, uncovering the secrets and dark history of the place and encountering a very small cast of characters. The game never takes itself too seriously while still delivering a gripping tale until the ending that got pretty deep which I really enjoyed. You figure out the story pretty quickly but there is still some surprises and twists especially towards the ending.

Audio/Sound:

Great sound design, chilling audio cues and ambient sounds when you just know there is something spooky nearby but its too dark to see. The creatures moaning and the ambient noises of the park are unsettling for the most part. The distorted once happy tracks that were played made me feel uneasy. Guns felt powerful and the it always felt like something bad was going to happen.

Replayability:

The game offers a low level of replayability for me, seems like it only offers a few small mechanics on extra playthroughs. Once you know the answers to the puzzles it's a pretty simple and short game. For me, I say play it once and maybe replay in a few years when you forget most of the game if you really enjoyed it. The main story is pretty linear, and it doesn't seem like the one or two choices you make really make a difference which might limit the replay value for some players. Play it once on survival mode and you'll be fine.


Overall Enjoyment:

This is a standout survival horror game despite the few flaws I had that successfully merges those nostalgic elements with a touch of modern gameplay. It offers an atmospheric experience with challenging puzzles, classic combat, and a simple but interesting story. If you're a fan of classic horror games or looking for a modern take on the genre that doesn't take too many risks or change too much about the formula, Crow Country is recommended.

Similar Games:

Classic:
Resident Evil series
Silent Hill series
Dino Crisis

"Modern":
The Evil Within series
Amnesia series
Fatal Frame series

The Sands of Time is a very fluid and exhilarating platformer, with smartly designed environmental puzzles, a killer soundtrack and fun chemistry between the Prince and Farah. The game is just held back by garbage combat encounters that overwhelm you with tons of enemies and it gets very frustrating and very repetitive as the game goes on. Not enough mechanical complexity or enemy types to justify these lengthy encounters. Still, this is a solid atmospheric adventure through ancient Persia that is worth playing for the stellar platforming alone.

Less substantial than the Dredge DLC as the rewards are just a few new dishes and a Godzilla bowhead, and its mostly one big boss fight which isn't the game's strongest aspect. Still they have Miki from the Heisei era movies and Ebirah show up so there was clearly some genuine fan love here instead of just getting the Godzilla name for the publicity alone so it’s all worth it. Make sure to add this to your account though, because apparently it'll only be available until like the end of the year or so.