Seriously fuck this game man

This game is funny right, funny xbox game with silly voice acting and voice acting and yeah japan made american game haha. I love all that that's all great.

The actual gameplay fucking sucks though. The entire game consist of your big dumb mech running around and slowly destroying identical towers over and over. That's almost the entire game. It's so fucking boring and tedious.

There are some little variations in gameplay but I'm serious that's almost the entire game.

Rescuing all the hostages and collecting all the cells is super tedious and annoying, so I mostly just collected whatever I saw and that was it.

The level variety is decent. I will say that.

The guns are so unbalanced. It makes no sense why some guns are so powerful while others aren't. Also you have to know before you unlock and buy the guns what is good or else you're actually fucked over. It's such a fucking annoying system and I legitimately just couldn't beat the final boss because of this.

The hit registration is terrible. Things will just constantly not take damage despite you clearly hitting them. meanwhile enemies will also constantly shoot you through walls.

Missions can be extremely long, like taking more than 20 minutes long, yet there are zero checkpoints to be found. If you die, you go all the way back to the start of the mission. It's so painful cause you have to slog through all the mind-numbing process of shooting down buildings over and over.

This is especially annoying in the final boss, where if you fail, you have to go through the timed slog of going up an elevator very slowly then shooting a bunch of objects to open a door. You must do this every single time you fail the boss fight, it takes up so much time.

The boss fight itself is so horrendous. It isn't fun whatsoever. It's a giant tank that just spams missiles at you infinitely. Apparently I chose the wrong upgrades because everywhere I looked people said to use guns I didn't have. I refuse to go back and play the other levels to get more currency to unlock those weapons so I'm basically soft-locked.

Also on the boss fight, you can't damage it with energy weapons, so if you've been using rail guns all game, too bad dude the game fucked you.

I dock this game down a full star cause of that fucking boss fight at the end, it's such bullshit. There is literally no way to avoid some of the missles and attacks the boss throws at you, the boss also dishes out attacks that can one shot kill you, thus now you must spend another 10-15 minutes to get back to the point you were at where you died. It's infuriating and time-wasting.

This game fucking sucks, it's a funny little joke with silly stuff going on in the story, but the actual gameplay is so trash. Don't play it.

This game brought a constant smile to my face. The gameplay is simple and satisfying and the music is dumb and catchy. But what will really make this game stick in my head forever is the dumbass story and voice acting. It's so nonsensical and absurd that it constantly got a laugh out of me. ESPECIALLY Jody and Richard. Richard is just so fun to watch, I don't think I've seen a character as cartoonishly evil as him in a long time. He's so fun. Uhh I guess it can get kind of annoying and repetitive sometimes but who cares, game's cool

Finally a good game by FromSoftware

This is a Japanese game from 2004, so thus it has a lottttta 2004 Japanese bullshit in it. The cameras bullshit, the controls are bullshit, the difficulty spikes are bullshit, the ways to get around those difficulty spikes are bullshit, the lack of actual content is bullshit, the replayability consisting of playing the same level over and over is bullshit, etc.

However, this is among the most batshit video game stories I’ve ever experienced, with a plethora of bizarre voice acting choices and typos and explosions and the fact that it is oddly prescient in a way that they never possibly thought it couldve been. It was very fun but also parts of it were such bullshit

Also RICHAAAAAARD

Copied from my Steam review:
Fantastic game. Super fun, super funny, with plenty of unlockables, secrets, and replay value. As much as the "AMERICA **** YEAH" type of humor doesn't necessarily land the same these days, it absolutely works here. Everything is completely absurd, and President Michael Wilson and his secretary, Jody Crawford, are a constant delight. Even the nasty conservative coup-leading villain is hilarious with how oddly delivered all the dialogue is.

If you like robots even a little bit you gotta try this. It's the best game FROMSOFT ever made.

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I would like to add on to this, and mention that the game does have some pretty big flaws. It can get a bit too janky and frustrating at a few points, and unless you start a brand new file there's no way to revisit some of the between-level story segments, which make up a LOT of the plot.

Metal Wolf Chaos is as ridiculous as it's reputation makes it seem. The story is complete and utter nonsense, yet it's immensely enjoyable. In between the absurdist lines of dialogue in the script are some pretty funny jabs at the American political system that are just as relevant now as it was then which makes it all the more amusing. The gameplay for the XD re-release is also a ton of fun, I ran into 0 frame issues, and the controls were snappy. I wasn't expecting this game to be very good, but I was very pleasantly surprised!