T H E B O U N C E R
The game isn't amazing by any stretch, but gotdamn the designs are so good, and the game is full of charm. All the dumb quirks like the wonky voice acting and jank ragdolls, combined with a playtime of only ~2 hours make this a fun game to go back to, especially since once you beat the game you unlock the ability to play as all of the different side characters.
If you're a fan of this game like me, do yourself a favor and look up some of the concept art, Normura's work here is incredible, and the amount of detail that went into this game is super cool.

This game is kinda rubbish. It feels like someone trying to recall Final Fantasy VII while drunk, and also while never having played Final Fantasy VII.

That said it's a triumph of maximalist late 90s/early 00s style. It's basically the last great psx game, and it's not even on the psx. It's as if someone had made a game out of the tribal-tattoo-design gba, but with more FMV.

Also, the combat is less bad than people say. Like it's STILL fairly bad, but I've played worse.

The Bouncer was obviously more of a technical demonstration of the PS2's power than a game to tease the level of quality the console's library would have though despite all that it's still actually kind of awesome. It's for an roughly 2 Hour hardware demonstration incredibly soulful and though it's as a brawler not that refined it's still really fun and once you get enough upgrades with the characters it's a true blast. It's a shame that The Bouncer never was meant for anything more it seems. There would be more than enough room for a sequel espicially with the amount of story each character has (Volt in particular). The Bouncer maybe short, unrefined and ultimately just a tech demo but it's still cool nonetheless and I recommend people espicially those who like games like Final Fight to actually give it a shot.
7/10

This game rules. It's a really short, quick game to play through but you get some variation by playing as different characters and succeeding/failing at certain non-combat objectives through the story. The animations and cutscenes are all fantastic, and the gameplay is pretty solid - it's a simple beat-em-up without too too much depth, but the characters can be upgraded as you play and there's enough here to bring you back to replay it a few times. I don't love all the dialogue or the character designs, but this game holds up really well despite that. Would love to see more small-scale AAA games like this today.

Eu não vou fazer rodeios. The Bouncer é muito, muito ruim.

Tão ruim que dá a volta...pra algumas pessoas. Pra mim foi uma experiência deplorável em matéria de gameplay, inconsistente por conta do sistema de colisão, mecânica de progressão e roteiro do jogo.

Um dos piores beat'em'ups que já joguei.

This game is the closest thing to The Room I've encountered in game form. That is to say, it is terrible, but engaging, and so incredibly dumb that I was constantly laughing at it. If it was any longer than the 90 minutes it took me to finish, I would have lost my mind. In this game's favor: no collectibles, skippable cutscenes.

This is Stun Lock - The Game. Every attack knocks you or enemies down, so a well timed button press can juggle even bosses to their doom easily. Or the same can happen to you.

This game is the blueprint to every writing problem you will ever encounter in Kingdom Hearts. It even stars prototype Sora, with an even worse outfit! Nothing gets explained before you're confused, and then its time for a flashback exposition dump for characters you've just met. (Make no mistake, if this story was told properly, it would still be failing grade anime trash.)

The fact this is an official Square release and not some repurposed fan project made by two people and released in beta on Steam floors and delights me. I have never encountered such confidently incorrect hubris in a game, rolling so deep in cliches that they are somehow able to take us from a bar to a satellite in two hours. None of it works and the character designs are just horrendous. Just one train wreck of a look to another until the final moments. (The final boss wears overalls with no shirt??? No one is wearing a shirt! Not a single named character has a shirt in this whole game!)

In my rating system, 2 stars represents an average, C rank game. This comfortably gets a D rank, 1 star rating. It only staved off an F rating by ending as soon as it did. A "How Did This Get Made" documentary for this game would be FASCINATING.

this game is a doozy, firstly i just wanna say that its gotta be one of the most unintentional HILARIOUS games i have played in a while, everything that happens is wild and the pacing is all over the place but i genuinely cant help but smile through whatever these bar bouncers go through

literally some shit the breakfast crew would go through.

the gameplay gets a lil repetitive, yeah sure, and the lack of a 3 player in the story is a bummer but its still a fun time cause of everything else

its like this weird fusion of a nickelodeon movie and rush hour thats all i could think about for some reason throughout the whole ride.

clean hour and a half game doesn't overstay its welcome just a neat piece of square history i feel.

would love to see a refined sequel but thats probably never gonna happen and im def not gonna be super duper antsy about like waiting for the next DK game to come out.

final thing of note, this feels like a "yeah i just got a ps2" typa game.

humble 6/10.