I've come to make an announcement; Shadow The Hedgehog's a bitch ass motherfucker, he pissed on my fucking wife. Thats right, he took his hedgehog quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife, and he said his dick was "This big" and I said that's disgusting, so I'm making a callout post on my twitter dot com, Shadow the Hedgehog, you've got a small dick, it's the size of this walnut except WAY smaller, and guess what? Here's what my dong looks like: PFFFT, THAT'S RIGHT, BABY. ALL POINTS, NO QUILLS, NO PILLOWS. Look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He fucked my wife so guess what? I'm gonna fuck the Earth. THAT'S RIGHT THIS IS WHAT YOU GET, MY SUPER LASER PISS! Except I'm not gonna piss on the earth. I'm gonna go higher. I'M PISSING ON THE MOON! HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, OBAMA? I PISSED ON THE MOON YOU IDIOT! YOU HAVE 23 HOURS BEFORE THE PISS DROPLETS HIT THE FUCKING EARTH NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT BEFORE I PISS ON YOU TOO.
This. This is quintessential Sonic to me. The story is unique, the stages are a blast to play (unless you're doing most mech stages), the characters are full of personality, and the style overall is amazing. The music is also a standout for me, as it really captures the essence of a grandiose adventure in real time. Highly recommend if you're looking to get into Sonic.
I have a really weird and irrational hatred for this game and I'm starting to think it's unironic
Like when I say it's the worst thing humanity has ever made I'm starting to think I'm being dead-ass and it's weird because it isn't THAT bad...
There are SOME positives.... (Now Second) best story in the franchise... great character-work... some levels like City Escape, Metal Harbour, Final Rush and Radical Highway are actually solid and rival the average quality of levels in the first SA game, although none top that game's upper tier levels except MAYBE Final Rush on a good day.
But the bad... Sonic/Shadow style controls way worse than in SA1, Crazy Gadget, Dogshit bosses, cutscenes with walking animation that honestly make me uncomfortable (like what the fuck their limbs are so skinny yet they move too realistically), Crazy Gadget, no hub worlds, worse OST than the first SA, Live and Learn included in that, Crazy Gadget, hunt stages are somehow worse than in SA1, MOTHERFUCKING CRAZY GADGET! THAT LEVEL UNIRONICALLY GIVES ME SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AT JUST THE THOUGHT OF PLAYING IT! I-
sigh
Yeah I think I'm being irrational and over-exaggerative. Probably like.... 3 stars unironically?
Like when I say it's the worst thing humanity has ever made I'm starting to think I'm being dead-ass and it's weird because it isn't THAT bad...
There are SOME positives.... (Now Second) best story in the franchise... great character-work... some levels like City Escape, Metal Harbour, Final Rush and Radical Highway are actually solid and rival the average quality of levels in the first SA game, although none top that game's upper tier levels except MAYBE Final Rush on a good day.
But the bad... Sonic/Shadow style controls way worse than in SA1, Crazy Gadget, Dogshit bosses, cutscenes with walking animation that honestly make me uncomfortable (like what the fuck their limbs are so skinny yet they move too realistically), Crazy Gadget, no hub worlds, worse OST than the first SA, Live and Learn included in that, Crazy Gadget, hunt stages are somehow worse than in SA1, MOTHERFUCKING CRAZY GADGET! THAT LEVEL UNIRONICALLY GIVES ME SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AT JUST THE THOUGHT OF PLAYING IT! I-
sigh
Yeah I think I'm being irrational and over-exaggerative. Probably like.... 3 stars unironically?
Hoooly. This game is so cooool. Obviously the highlight of the game is Sonic/Shadow stages, and of course, the mech ones are the worst, but even then, this game is so cool, and it's so fun to try to A-Rank the stages. I played it in Japanese as well, and let me tell you, its PEAK. Aaaand I did NO chao garden, because I HATE IT.