CottonSwab
64 Reviews liked by CottonSwab
Mario Kart 7
2011
This game has a surprisingly incredible track selection.
do not play this game. you will SHIT.
Mario Power Tennis
2004
I don't think there's been an actual good Mario Tennis game since this one. Phenomenal in all regards, holds a special place in my heart as it was one of my first Mario games, and it was the first time I've laid my eyes upon the visage of God (Wario).
Sonic.EXE
2013
sonic.exe burned my crops and killed my firstborn
Ultrakill
2020
"Conquest leads to war - War leads to famine - Famine leads to..."
When I first reviewed this game I was like "I'll rate this higher once the full game comes out." But then they released Layer 7, and Layer 7 alone is probably the most gruesome, grand, and incredible addition made to the game. Each enemy compliments the greater sandbox wonderfully, and Hakita "Heaven Pierce Her" went absolutely CRAZY on the soundtrack for this game. The entire layer is like watching a smoldering fire, it just feels unfortunate. It makes sense that the Layer of hell titled "Violence" would have the most insane levels in the game. 7-2 is my favorite stage gameplay and music-wise.
When I first reviewed this game I was like "I'll rate this higher once the full game comes out." But then they released Layer 7, and Layer 7 alone is probably the most gruesome, grand, and incredible addition made to the game. Each enemy compliments the greater sandbox wonderfully, and Hakita "Heaven Pierce Her" went absolutely CRAZY on the soundtrack for this game. The entire layer is like watching a smoldering fire, it just feels unfortunate. It makes sense that the Layer of hell titled "Violence" would have the most insane levels in the game. 7-2 is my favorite stage gameplay and music-wise.
Minecraft
2011
i keep getting blown up by these green cocks and its pissing me off. hope they remove this bug.
once again sony makes a game for stupid ass nerds. nerds that wear suspenders and dorky glasses and a button up shirt tucked into their slacks. im a cool jock. i am the football captain and i shove nerds like peter parker and his fans into lockers and give them swirlies or even an atomic wedgie
RoboCop: Rogue City
2023
game so raw it gave me chlamydia. that or maybe i got it from a hooker
God of War
2018
they never explain why the dad is white
Dig Dug
1982
I am Dig-Dug's strongest soldier.
Galaga
1981
FIGHTER CAPTURED
Pole Position
1982
As a kid I played it on Namco Museum 64, now I have no idea how this works. Pretty cool I guess.
LittleBigPlanet
2008
One of the first games I've ever played. Peak fiction, I'm not exaggerating.
Happy Wheels
2010
A relic of a bygone era.
This game feels incorrect in a way that I cannot point out. It's like it works, but doesn't. It's fun, but at the same time infuriating. It's a mildly enjoyable romp.