When it comes to the video game industry, there are always going to be things that are inevitable. There’s gonna be a new crappy sports game every year, even though many will still buy it anyway, companies will always overwork their staff and treat them like shit, even though that issue goes beyond video games, there will be plenty of big achievements and disappointments to be seen all throughout the year, and of course, Mega Man will get a new game. Or at least, that was an inevitability back in the day, but now it is a rarity more than anything. Yes, it really just seems like it wouldn’t have been a complete year back then without some kind of Mega Man product coming out, because if this didn’t happen, the world may end up exploding. At least, that could be what Capcom’s thought process was with the series back then, hence why so many of them came out, and while many people may have gotten sick of it, I wouldn’t say I fit into this category, as I continue down the line of these generic, yet still enjoyable titles with Mega Man IV.

One of the words you could use to describe the Game Boy Mega Man games wouldn’t be “innovative”. For every single game so far, while there has been some new elements seen here or there, such as a new character or new weapon, for the most part, they have been the same old games that many have expected from them at this point, reusing many different robot masters, weapons, and stages from the NES games to the point where it felt incredibly stale to most. However, thankfully, for the fourth entry in this sub-series, there was NEW STUFF!......... somewhat, which not only made for an interesting entry to jump back into, but also yet another enjoyable one as well. Sure, the new stuff that was introduced wasn’t too major, and the same gripes people would have about the previous games still applies here, but for those who don’t care about that, we have another fun romp to blast through and enjoy.

The story is a deep, complex narrative about the destruction of mankind, a study covering the world’s justice system, and a moral dilemma about what Mega Man is truly fighting for………………… nah, just kidding, it’s Dr. Wily trying to take over the world again and Mega Man has to stop him (you really expected anything else?), the graphics are Game Boy graphics, using the exact same sprite style as all the other previous games, which still looks good, so I’m not too bothered by it, the music is good, once again feature Game Boy renditions of previous themes, which all sound good here, and the original tracks aren’t that bad either, the control is the same as the previous games, so nothing to complain about there, and the gameplay is exactly what you have come to expect at this point.

The game is a 2D action platformer, where you take control of Mega Man once again, take on plenty of different levels to fight many familiar Robot Masters, jump and shoot your way through plenty of different enemies, environments, and obstacles, gather plenty of health and ammo pickups, cannisters, and extra lives to help you out along your journey, take down many different bosses from the Robot Masters to Wily’s machines, and gather plenty of different new weapons to use to your advantage in the stages that lie ahead. It is all what you have come to expect from a Game Boy Mega Man game, but I am happy to say that, for the first time in this series, there is actually some new stuff for once!

First of all, there is now a new type of item called the P-Chip that you collect throughout the game, and you can now use it at Dr. Light’s shop in between levels. You can use these chips to purchase things such as extra lives, E-Tanks and weapon tanks, getting the ammo of your weapons refilled, and even the Energy Balancer, which I didn’t think would be brought back this soon in the series. Sure, this isn’t anything all that special, and most of the stuff you can get from the shops you can just find in the regular levels, but the fact that it is there at all is a nice little addition. Alongside this, the collectibles from the NES games also make a comeback, with two sets of letters both spelling out Beat and Wily respectively. Of course, from the first set of letters, you get to use Beat once again, which is always nice to see, and as for the Wily letters, they allow you to….. beat the game. Kind of a waste if you ask me, but hey, the letters themselves are pretty easy to find and collect, so it isn’t really that big of a deal.

If all that doesn’t get you excited to jump into another one of these titles, nor does the inclusion of a new Mega Man Killer do that for you, then there is no real reason to justify you seeking this out then. It is, once again, your typical classic Mega Man game, which may satisfy the huge Mega Man nerds like myself, but for others, it would be seen more as a waste of time at the end of the day. When it comes to actual problems that I have with the game, I have one minor one that doesn’t ruin the experience, but it is worth mentioning nonetheless. In this game, whenever you fire off a charged shot, there is a bit of recoil that happens as a result, and for anyone who has played any other Mega Man game before, you would know that this doesn’t happen at all in any other entry. This makes firing the charge shot feel weird, and it can kinda throw you off in precarious spots, but this is only on a few occasions, and it doesn’t become too big of an issue, with you being able to adjust pretty quickly.

Overall, despite the recoil thing being odd, as well as not too many big changes to the main formula, Mega Man IV is still another very fun entry in this repetitious, yet enjoying sub-series in this franchise, and I had a great time revisiting it after not playing it since I initially did a long time ago. I definitely recommend it for big Mega Man fans, as well as those who enjoyed the previous Game Boy titles, as this game delivers plenty of the same fun gameplay to you, but with a little extra sprinkled in, and that’s always nice to see. Although, with all that being said, why does Mega Man’s face on the cover art of this game look kinda… off? It’s like he is in the middle of transitioning out of that dumbass face from the Mega Man 3-5 box art, and into the normal one he would have for the rest of the series. I could make an entire video series analyzing these obnoxious box arts, because they are truly something to behold.

Game #442

I predicted that every subsequent handheld adventure featuring the Blue Bomber would be better than the last, and that remains to be true. Mega Man IV Game Boy (Rockman World 4) is a major improvement over the first three games, sticking to what worked before and implementing elements from the NES games that weren't featured in the GB predecessors like the typical boss rush, while adding in new features that became staples in future mainline entries. We have new items such as the Weapon and Super Energy Tanks, the Energy Balancer which makes its debut here, and the most notable feature of all, the shop. Predating Mega Man 7 in about two years, this uses P Chips as currency that can be obtained in levels or by defeating enemies and can be spent on 1-Ups and the items I've alluded to earlier.

For the returning Robot Masters, we have Bright Man, Toad Man, Pharaoh Man, and Ring Man from Mega Man 4, and in the second half, we have Stone Man, Charge Man, Napalm Man, and Crystal Man from Mega Man 5 with the Mega Man Killer this time being Ballade. That's cool and all, and I do like Ballade's design, but I want to give a shout-out to its presentation. It's gorgeous and a huge step up from before, and I can visually see it in its opening cutscene and Wily Battleship. My favorite has got to be the cutscene before we fight Dr. Wily where we see Mega Man running in an isometric view before he stops dead in his tracks and looks up at Wily's giant mech in the background in another angle; very impressive for a 1993 Game Boy game. I do think the levels inside Wily Battleship drag on a bit, and the recoil after Mega Man releases his Charge Shot is a bit strange; nothing game-breaking, just found it to be weird that this is the only game so far where he has a bit of kickback.

Mega Man World 4 is a solid experience that is definitely worth your time if you're a fan of the series. It improves on its predecessors and at the same time provides new features that became mainstays for console entries to come, and that's something I can appreciate. I hope the fifth and final entry in the pentalogy will continue with the pattern by improving over what came before.

Kirby's Dream Land 2 feels like an alternate universe of what Kirby's Adventure is, taking a direction of a more crayon/drawing inspired world rather than the cartoon/anime inspired world of Kirby's Adventure.

Coming back to the gameboy, KDL2 takes the idea of copy abilities from it's console counterpart KA but gives it it's own unique spin. In the wake of having much less abilities than KA, we have the introduction of Kirby's animal buddies which kind of act like a Super Mario powerup. The key difference here is that that copy abilities Kirby gets are now modified with the animal buddy you have equipped. e.g. if you have the hamster buddy and the spark ability, it turns the ability into a fusion of spark and beam from KA. This is a really cool idea, and mixing and matching powers with animal buddies to see what you get is fun. But at the end of the day, I still prefer to pick and choose exactly what copy ability I want, rather than having to find the right animal buddy to get it.

The game is still so much fun just like it's previous counterparts, however I felt somehow the level design wasn't as strong. Like it was designed by a more inexperienced team (maybe this is the case). Especially towards the end where there were some buillshit sections. Even some of the bosses are the weakest in the series so far. To be fair though, for a Kirby game it was pretty challenging, but not for the best reasons.

Cool ideas held back by some questionable level design decisions and bossfights. I feel like this is the only Kirby game I've played so far that I've still enjoyed, but don't feel the need to ever replay it.

An admirable attempt to recreate some lightning in a bottle that is MOSTLY successful. My heart fell a bit when I saw that this, the first outsourced Mega Man, was developed by Minakuchi Engineering, the company that would eventually go on to absolutely biff Mega Man X3, so I was pleasantly surprised at how well the feel of NES Mega Man is approximated here. It looks right, it sounds right, and it more or less feels right too. Maybe a little bit looser than you expect, but I lost a lot more lives to some truly hateful enemy placements and overhead platforms forcing pixel perfect horizontal jumps than I did from any trouble with the controls.

The crop of robot masters reused for the game is good, and 4 is the right call I think for a bite sized experience, but they ARE all rendered easy as hell presumably by the memory limitations of the gameboy. Not that the Mega Man 1 guys had genius AI scripts to begin with but I was cheesing all of them here by accident, I didn’t even know HOW to make the fights fair and I was actively trying to. There’s one new guy in the Wily stage too and he’s very cool, I like him a lot he’s got a sword that looks like a needle because on the gameboy sprites.

Even with SEVERAL game overs I was in and out of this thing in like 80 minutes, and they were mostly pretty fun! When they aren’t INEXPLICABLY fucking you SUPER HARD at key points these are a very smooth set of levels.

I always crave more classic mega man and I am rapidly running out of it so hats off to the fallen heroes at Minakuchi Engineering for keeping this train going just a little longer. It’s, Good Enough.

I’ve always liked Super Meat Boy, but never loved it until recently. Being one of the first of the many “masocore” platformers, it’s always maintained relevance since the 2008 prototype. It doesn’t have any major gimmicks, and instead focuses on the games of old. You have a simple goal.

Dr Fetus has kidnapped Bandage Girl. Save Bandage Girl! It’s as simple as it gets. Well, what about the controls? You run, jump, and that’s it. So, where’s the fun? The controls. I firmly believe that Super Meat Boy has the best controls of any platformer released to date. Meat Boy is incredibly fast, while also having a floaty jump. Normally I’d say that this is bad for most games, but Super Meat Boy makes it work. All of the levels are designed with this high speed and floatiness in mind, stretching the controls to the furthest possibility. It’s most noticeable in the much later levels, but even then, this attention to detail is present in earlier levels. It makes the game feel truly limitless, by allowing you to speed through the levels, having an extremely high skill ceiling down to the very frame. It’s a bit unwieldy, but once you master it, it feels like you can do anything. And do everything you shall, because there's a catch. It’s called SUPER for a reason. Super Meat Boy is considered among the hardest platformers, and for good reason. It’s a relentlessly difficult game, doubly so for 100%, but that’s where the beauty of the game lies within. Sure, you may retry a dozen times just to unlock the Dark World level, but by all accounts, the game pushes you to that mastery by rewarding you for overcoming challenges. It wants you to succeed. It’s difficult, but fair, and one of the most rewarding to conquer. The levels all feel distinctive from one another, and each individual one teaches the player a different lesson throughout their short runtimes. The level progression of Super Meat Boy is nothing but incredible. It introduces a gimmick in one level, and each level builds upon it. And then suddenly, another gimmick pops up. And then another, and another, and another, until you’re working with all of the mechanics before you even know it. And then the Dark World version of the level shows how much better you can get with said mechanics. No gimmick feels underutilized, nor unfun and cheap, and no level feels forgettable at all. It emphasizes how strong the whole game’s design is. And if you really want a challenge, you can always go for the Bandages! The bandages of Super Meat Boy force you to master the level to even get a shot at them. Getting them is the easier part. Surviving is harder. If you so much as graze a saw with these babies, you lose the bandage, but succeed and the game proudly announces that you got the bandage. It's a feeling like no other. I had my shit absolutely rocked throughout the entirety of Super Meat Boy 100%. Getting the bandages really made me feel like I accomplished something, both in a metaphorical and literal sense, as unlocking bandages allows you to play as brand new characters.

Akin to The Binding of Isaac, all characters cover a specific niche. Meat Boy is your main man, with all of the levels designed for him first and foremost. The others give you entirely new platforming abilities, but typically have a stipulation, like for example, Commander Video. He gets a short float, but is pretty slow compared to Meat Boy. There's about 10 characters overall, a few of which require a secret code to be inputed. The cool thing about it is that most characters come from other indie games, making Super Meat Boy feel more like a video game which proves how far indie games have come. Even more interestingly, the console and PC versions of the game has different characters within them, each accommodating the difference in the Indie scene on PC and Consoles. The Warp Zones themselves have the same characters, so Commander Video from Bit.Trip, Jill from… Mighty Jill Off, Ogmo from Jumper, the titular character, Flywrench, and The Kid from I Wanna Be The Guy are all here and accounted for. Meanwhile, Gish, Tim, Guy Spelunky, Pink Knight, and The Ninja are console exclusive, while Headcrab, Alien Hominid, Josef, Naija, RunMan, Captain Viridian, and MR. MINECRAFT, are all exclusive to PC. In the end, it doesn't really matter which version you play, but it kind of sucks that we never got some Super Meat Boy Definitive Edition with all of the characters from both versions, but in general, the balance of characters is very solid. While The Kid is among the best characters in the game for the best double jump in the game, he is a lot slower and jumps lower than Meat Boy. And also, in order to even get him, you need to complete the 3 hardest levels in the game, back to back.

This is a perfect transition into talking about the bane of my existence. GOLDEN GOD. Is actually really fun! Super Meat Boy will take you about a weekend to complete, but GOLDEN GOD could take upwards of a month to achieve. I played on-and-off ad nauseam over the course of a year, amd Golden God completely transforms Super Meat Boy as a game. In order to achieve Golden God, you need to
- Clear all 7 Light Worlds, with an A+ Rank
- Clear all 7 Dark Worlds (aka X worlds), harder versions of the Light World, but no A+ ranks are needed
- Obtain all 100 Bandages
- Unlock every Character
- Clear all Warp Zones, sets of 3 bite sized levels with 3 lives per level
- Clear all Glitch levels (technically optional but adds to 100%)
So... yeah, any completionist certainly has their work cut out for them. The Dark Worlds alone nearly broke me, but damn did I pop off when I cleared every one of them. Chapters 1, 2, 3, and 6 are pretty manageable when it comes to their challenge, but I genuinely contemplated quitting the entire operation at World 4X. I was 100%ing each World at about 1 or 2 per day, but 4X threw off my flow by a lot. It took me about 3 days to fully beat it alone, and 5X only got more and more challenging. 5X is among the most challenging worlds in the entire game. Each level was a challenging contraption made with only the most difficult platforming setpieces in the entire game. But each time I died, the music always brought me coming back for more!

Super Meat Boy’s soundtrack is legendary, no doubt about it. Some of the most Newgrounds esque shit that you can imagine, but it’s some of that good shit nonetheless. Forest Funk was stuck in my head for months once I first conquered Super Meat Boy, Beatus Blues is an incredibly catchy tune. Can O’ Salt is a Minecraft song (described by one of my IRLs), Hell feels grand and imposing, and The Rapture feels like a goddamn military tune. The End is weirdly cinematic but also really good, and CHAPTER MOTHERFUCKING 7!

Chapter 7 is where my 100% streak really died off. I completed 5 levels a DAY at this point. There are no bandages, no warp zones, nothing. Just you, your controller, and Bandage Girl. Yeah, for Chapter 7 alone, you get to play as Bandage Girl. And these levels aren’t among the most difficult in the game, they ARE the most difficult in the game. Don’t let the happy music and overabundance of pink fool you. The Cotton Alley has some of the most pseudo-pixel perfect shit that you can imagine, but once again, it’s HARD but FAIR. I never wanted to ragequit because the game wasn’t unfair. It’s one of the hardest 2D platforming levels ever made, but one of the best. Every single piece of tech that the game taught you comes back for a spectacular finale, and a spectacular finale that is. This all culminates in the HARDEST level I’ve ever beaten. “The Four Letter Word” is IMPOSSIBLE. It’s 1 minute of straight pixel perfect platforming, easily the hardest level in the game, and it was 11 PM. I was in my room alone, with only the bright visuals of the Cotton Alley keeping me awake. But I was determined. And it took over a very long time, but after an hour, I saw Meat Boy. I was at the goal. I made the final jump, and dropped my controller. I was so satisfied, but I knew that was only half the battle. So, I got a good night’s rest, knowing that the following day would be hell.

Or was it? I powered through Cotton Alleys’ Dark World like it was nothing. I was Meat Boy. I felt the heaviness on my heart each time he died, but each victory kept me coming back for more and more. I crushed half of the levels like soda cans. But the remaining few pushed me past my breaking point. And with 4 levels to go, with just me and the game, I received... Golden God??? Welp, that was fun! Yeah, not sure why the achievement unlocked early, but I decided to leave it at that. But as the final completion reward, you unlock the Meat Ninja, who always runs and can teleport through sawblades after pressing X. You can’t use the leaderboards with him, but it’s a solid reward for 100%.

Super Meat Boy is a masterclass of game design, being one of the best platformers ever made. It has over 300 handcrafted levels, all of which test the player’s skills in the best way possible. It’s one of those pick up and play games, where you can play and clear a few levels, or complete the entire game in a sitting. It’s a fun game, to put it simply, and I can’t recommend it enough, now that the XBLA store is shutting down. Rest In Peace, but long live Steam. Welp. What is there to to cover now?

MYSELF. Yeah, I know this is pretty out of scope to cover in a controversial platforming series with a silly cube of meat, but I wanted to talk about another controversial platforming series with a Witch. A dark one, perhaps. Plus, it directly related to me and the near future of zeusdeegoose as a whole, and I’ve done so in the past with my Binding of Isaac reviews. So humor me for a bit, or, if you’ve had your fill, feel free to click off, and I wish you a good day. For many people within my Discord and other related spaces, they knew that I was re-reviewing The Legend of Dark Witch series in it’s entirety; keyword, was, and I have to upsettingly say that said review series is now canceled. Many people don’t know about it, and I think that’s a good thing. It was a series that I used to play in the past, and me and a few friends have heavily criticized over the past few years. We also have a bit of bad blood within said community itself. We were talking about it again and how the developer sucked, practically beating it down as a farce of a franchise, mostly leaving the community stuff out of it as a whole. And while I still agree those remarks about the developer, one discussion got taken pretty far as I took a jab at one of the wiki’s vandals, and that spiraled into one of the members of the server leaving. Initially, I thought it was going to be a lighthearted joke, but it was pretty inappropriate of me and for those involved, I do apologize. I won’t extrapolate anything further at the behest of the people in said chat, as the server that the discussions were held within was a private venue, and I don’t wish to share any links so said server.

Secondly, after said conversation, I realized something huge. I didn’t NEED to re-review the series. I mean, what would I get out of it? Initially, the thought going in was that this would re-introduce people into zeusdeegoose’s past by re-reviewing what got the ball rolling for the long ass review format and to bury the hatchet for the final time, but here’s the thing. I already kind of did that. I had already archived my Wiki reviews on Backloggd, and notwithstanding the occasional bias, my criticisms of each game have still held up. So the newer reviews would just be... lesser. I don’t have the energy nor the time to discuss every stage in Dark Witch 2 again when that would go against the overall message of the review series; that being that The Legend of Dark Witch is a dogshit series, aside from 1 and 2, and I don’t think it’s worth potentially burning some bridges just to prove my point. Me and other friends have already long since moved on, and potentially bringing a lolicon back into the spotlight simply isn’t worth the effort that’d I’d put into it.

Thirdly, I got burnt out. Ladies and Gentlemen, I LOVE tearing apart games I hate, believe me. Super Meat Boy Forever is one of my favorite reviews that I’ve ever made. But I can only say “This game fucking sucks” so many times before getting tired, folks. And that’s just the review side. Imagine playing 8 games back to back, 99% of which are mid, and the 1% are games that I’ve burnt myself out on and already played for hundreds of hours already (not joking, btw). I didn’t hate myself for booting up The Binding of Isaac, because The Binding of Isaac is an actually GOOD video game that I like. Wow! But whenever I boot up any Dark Witch game, I just feel disappointed.

Fourthly, who cares? I could make point after point about why NAN-A and The Legend of Dark Witch suck, but it’s fruitless. The Legend of Dark Witch is far past it’s eShop era where it was actually semi-popular. Hell, I’d bet now that the games don’t even average a sale a day, with the 3DS eShop now gone. Now, only a very small, inactive fanbase remains. Ever since me and others left, it’s a complete GHOST TOWN. Nobody cares about it anymore. I’ve barely heard anyone in my online sphere talk about it, and it remains as a niche franchise, like it should be. People got their balls blown off with 1 and 2, and then almost all of us collectively fucked off afterwards because the games SUCKED and it wasn’t active anymore. Now that the dust has settled, it’d only serve to piss people off who still give a damn about the series anymore. And trust me, they WOULD get pissed. I’ve seen it firsthand. And as funny as it would be, I don't want to act as if I'm some villain or something.

So... yeah. That’s all I got to say on the matter. Sorry to anyone who was expecting the review, and sorry to anyone who was involved in the first incident. It was a flawed idea from the start, and I really don’t have anyone to blame for the reviews except myself. Now, for real this time, I’m burying the hatchet. No more of my valuable time will be spent on a video game franchise made by some jizzer. I may edit this out sooner or later, because truth be told, it’s mostly irrelevant to a game series with a funny meat man, but I just needed to get my thoughts out, off of my chest, and announce that the series is canceled, as disappointing as it may be. Finally, I still have all of my Dark Witch reviews in a Google Doc, so if you'd like to see them, whether that be out of curiosity or otherwise, come on over. ;) Shoot me a DM to @zeusdeegoose, either on Twitter or Discord. They’ll remain forever unfinished, but hey, if people wanted to know how it would've played out, they can come and see. But now, with all that being said, lets just move on to greener fields because I don’t know what else to talk about.

Sooooo... it might be too early, but it may be time to start another review series. I’ve been playing a wider variety of games than ever before. Old games, new games, and even bear games. I’ve had good games and bad games, but it’s true love that we share! So I do have quite a few on my mind that I want to do. Blaster Master Zero, Super Monkey Ball, and Devil May Cry are all on my mind. So, I hope you’re looking out for those because they’re probably coming soon. Blaster Master Zero will probably be first up, as I’ve finished all of them, and then Super Monkey Ball and DMC will follow soon after. Again, there may or may not be a bit of a drought when it comes to reviews thanks to the aforementioned cancellation, so apologies. But, zeusdeegoose always comes back stronger than it was. So please tune in, when it’s ready of course. But in the meantime, I’m going back to the Basement so I can type more reviews. If you’ve read this far, I really appreciate your support, but please go outside. It’s almost Summer now, and the sun is good for your skin and health. Don’t be like me. Or hell, play Super Meat Boy! You wont regret it.

The term demake gets thrown around kind of a lot nowadays to just mean "remake I don't like" but I always thought of it to mean remaking a game on weaker hardware. In this case, we have Ristar for the Sega Game Gear, which is far weaker than the Sega Genesis.

TBH? It's by far the most impressive deconversion of a game ever made, to the point I much prefer it to the Genesis version. All the levels I disliked such as the water levels are replaced with new more straightforward levels like a cool rainbow level (be sure to play the Japanese version of GG Ristar!) or bomb disposal level. I just enjoy not having to play with the swimming physics again.

The music and graphics are a bit of a downgrade of course, but GG Ristar punches far harder than its weight class would suggest. I could listen to its version of the OST for ages https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZIuBpTd9P8

Also, even the English version retains the story from the Japanese original which was changed in the English Genesis release. Very neat! But I think the coolest technical achievement is how they managed to replicate the ending effects on Game Gear! https://youtu.be/SxdHf1xz0w4?t=2254

It's the same Ristar you know and love, only with all the filler bits removed and replaced with mostly more interesting things imo. The new collectibles are really fun to casually walk through and I appreciate how many extra things there are to grab such as enemy shields and spears. Easy rec for fans of the original.

I just think it's really funny that this game exists, and I can't let myself give it a bad review.

It's just a reskin of Wolfenstein 3D, but instead of killing Nazis, you're knocking out animals on Noah's Ark. If you're having too much fun, the game has got you covered, because it splices up the EPIC gameplay with Bible quizzes. You're really getting your money's worth with this title.

This is just one of those games that I appreciate a lot with how absurd the idea of itself even is.

Average reading time: 10 minutes

A challenging platformer wrapped in a very pretty package.

This isn't my first foray with Croc. I distinctly remember attempting to play through this game a number of years ago and then quitting in world 3 due to a crazy difficulty spike. Now, a few years later, my brain spiders command me to once again control the lovable green reptilian and try to beat this game for good. Of course, I knew what I was getting into, and decided to make one small, yet absurdly essential change to make this game more fun.

Now, anyone who's read my Billy Hatcher review knows my opinions about lives systems in games, and that opinion of mine isn't going away. Because of this, I implemented an unlimited lives cheat for this run. As I go further into detail about my time with Croc, it will become clearer as to why I did this, but I did want to state this early on, just for the sake of clarity regarding my experience this time around.

Now, Croc has a simple story. You witness Croc floating in a basket towards a group of Gobbos, who then adopt and raise him. Soon, Baron Dante makes his presence known, sending his troops to kidnap the Gobbos. The Gobbo King bangs a gong to have Croc sent away from the chaos, allowing Croc the chance to fight back and save his friends!

A simple plot for a simple game. However, the instruction manual gives way more detail about the Gobbo world. Reading it will teach you more about the Gobbos as a species, the Gobbo King, referred to as "King Rufus the Intolerant", Croc's experiences growing up with the Gobbos, and even information about Baron Dante's evil group, referred to as "The Dantinis". It's also a bizarrely funny read, with a lot of jokes that stick the landing very well. If you want to read something that will make you constantly double take, read the Croc instruction manual!

Once you take control of Croc, you'll immediately notice a point of contention regarding this game: it's a 3D platformer with tank controls. Needless to say, not the most comfortable platforming experience. Even using an analog controller does not fix this issue, sadly. You'll often find yourself stopping to turn yourself to line up a jump, and jumping feels very stiff. Whatever direction you plan on moving in the air is the only direction you're moving, with little room for adjustment. Over time, of course, you'll get used to the platforming mechanics, but you'll never find yourself saying "this feels great to play!"

Aside from running and jumping, Croc has a few extra moves at his disposal. One of the most vital moves he possesses is his ability to turn around! Using a dedicated button, Croc can do a 180 degree turn whenever he wants, which is a godsend for re-orienting yourself to line up another jump. If you do it while he's on the move, he'll do a really cool flip that made me react like this when I first saw it.

As for Croc's combat ability, he has two moves to use. First, he has a tail swipe move that's great for deleting enemies from existence. His other move is a ground pound, performed by hitting the jump button twice. Aside from dispatching enemies, this move will allow Croc to bust open crates and objects blocking tunnel passageways. Gonna be honest here, I don't like that you have to hit jump twice for this. I wish it was mapped to a different button, because I would often have scenarios where I was doing a precision platforming section that required me to jump as soon as I landed on a platform, and if my timing was off slightly it would result in Croc stopping in midair, asserting the ground-pound position, and plummeting to his death. Not fun.

It's also worth noting that when Croc performs his attacking moves, he has a number of onomatopoeia's he can blurt out, such as "yazoo!" or "kersplat!" You would think this would get annoying after a while, but honestly it never bothered me. I think it adds to Croc's character, being a young croco on a big adventure to save a tribe of people who have a tradition of shoving kitchen utensils down their pants (PLEASE READ THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL I PROMISE I DIDN'T MAKE THAT UP)

Speaking of Croc as a character, oh man, would you take a look at these little guys! This game is filled to the brim with scrimblo-type characters, little dudes that you're gonna want plushies of as soon as you see them. They're EVERYWHERE! If you love little weirdos and want to catalogue them all, this is the perfect game for you. Absolutely loved seeing each new creature emerge on my screen as I played.

Okay, so we have cute characters in a fuzzy 32-bit world clearly made for kids. The controls take some getting used to but surely the main game doesn't get too taxing, right? Oh, how I wish I could say yes. For the first two worlds, it's honestly a pretty comfortable romp. Level design is highly forgiving, featuring non-intimidating level design unless you're going after collectibles. Once you hit world 3, though, you'll start seeing much more difficult stage layouts requiring you to perform more precise movements to get by. For me, this is where Croc begins to fall in terms of quality.

So, Croc behaves like Sonic the Hedgehog when it comes to taking damage, in that he'll drop this game's ring equivalent (gems) when getting hit. Get hit without them and you'll lose a life. It's around world 3 where you'll begin facing much more challenging platforming over damaging floors and bottomless pits. Because of this, it is incredibly easy to lose lives. Thankfully, you're given a checkpoint at every door/tunnel you exit, which means a death won't set you too far back. Getting a game over, however, sends you back to whichever stage you last saved at, which means starting a level over again from the beginning.

Now, on paper this doesn't seem like too bad of a punishment, but after getting game over's over and over again due to how easy it is for Croc to die I began to find it intolerable, hence why I opted for the unlimited lives cheat. I can accept dying and having to re-do a small section but having to re-do a stage over and over due to game overs, especially when you get close to the end of a stage, just feels intolerable in the modern era. If you want to tackle this game without such assists, then all the power to you. Just be prepared for a lot of level attempts in the back half of the game and lots of visits to specific stages to grind extra lives hidden away in secret spots.

When it comes to collectables in stages, you really only have two to worry about: Gobbos and colored gems. There are six Gobbos hidden in each stage, and collecting all of the Gobbos in the game allow you to access some secret levels that unlock even more secret stuff. Throughout the stage, you'll find five of these Gobbos hidden in boxes, cages, and on hard-to-reach platforms. "Wait hold on five? I thought you said there were six Gobbos in a stage!" So remember when I mentioned colored gems? You can find five of these in each stage either disguised as regular gems or hidden in boxes. Collecting all of these unlocks a door near the end of each stage, where you will either complete a platforming challenge or a minigame to rescue the last Gobbo.

The platforming challenges are straightforward enough. However, it's the minigames where I take issue with this system. While most minigames are perfectly fine, there's one that I dislike immensely. Basically, you have a cauldron that you control by jumping on two arrow buttons. Your goal is to catch the gems descending from the sky. Catch them all and you're awarded a Gobbo. The problems here are that this minigame goes on way too long, and if you miss even one, the mini game ends. You may think "Oh, if I die I can reset the mini game and try again." A smart idea, but sadly not the case. Losing any minigame without securing a Gobbo will require you to beat the entire stage again to retry it. This means re-collecting every Gobbo and colored gem along the way, which is a frustrating process if it happened in a more difficult level, even if you know what you're getting into.

With how difficult the stages can get, you would think the boss fights would also prove to be challenging. Surprisingly, the bosses in this game are absurdly easy. It's your typical "wait for them to attack and hit them when they're vulnerable" type of fights throughout the game, and dodging attacks is as simple as running in a circle around the boss while they do their thing. Also, almost every boss does this thing where they just stop animating and freeze after you deal the final blow, which is always funny to witness.

The more thing I want to touch on is the music. The soundtrack is pretty good! There's some leitmotif sprinkled throughout the stages, with overworld and underground areas sharing some melodies. The title screen is also pretty catchy and may or may not have had a chunk of its melody lifted from it to be a part of a main theme for a Nintendo game.

Speaking of Nintendo, it's worth noting that this game began life as a pitch for a 3D Yoshi game. After the pitch was turned down, it became Croc, and you can kinda see some of that Yoshi blood in here a little bit. You have a green reptile protagonist who can ground pound (a move Yoshi had in Yoshi's Island) as well as a bad guy who uses magic to make smaller creatures into tough boss enemies. Swap the characters for Yoshi's Island ones and add a tongue move and flutter jump to Croc's arsenal and you basically have a Yoshi game, which is fun to think about as you experience this game.

Overall, I didn't hate Croc. I love his design, and the Gobbo Archipelago is fun to explore. The enemies you encounter are all cute and charming, and hearing Croc exclaim things like "Wazoo" never gets old. However, the stage design, especially in the back half of this game, combined with the awkward controls make this a difficult game to clear. I recommend giving this game a shot, despite the difficulty.

The aesthetics of this game invoke an aura of childhood innocence and succeeds at taking you back to a time where things felt simpler, even if the game isn't the easiest around. For that reason alone, I feel that Croc is worth visiting today. Even with the rise of low-poly indie 3D platformers, there's none that I am aware of that really capture the welcoming aesthetics of Croc.