Bio
I make cool free games, you can play them here:

https://farawaytimes.itch.io/
Personal Ratings
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Loved

Gained 100+ total review likes

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Created 10+ public lists

GOTY '23

Participated in the 2023 Game of the Year Event

Popular

Gained 15+ followers

Well Written

Gained 10+ likes on a single review

Gone Gold

Received 5+ likes on a review while featured on the front page

Liked

Gained 10+ total review likes

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Mentioned by another user

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Created a list folder with 5+ lists

Elite Gamer

Played 500+ games

Gamer

Played 250+ games

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Become mutual friends with at least 3 others

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Gained 3+ followers

N00b

Played 100+ games

Favorite Games

Espgaluda
Espgaluda
Mega Man Legends
Mega Man Legends
Helen's Mysterious Castle
Helen's Mysterious Castle
SeaBed
SeaBed
Planescape: Torment
Planescape: Torment

611

Total Games Played

017

Played in 2024

000

Games Backloggd


Recently Played See More

Ace Combat 2
Ace Combat 2

Jul 13

Air Combat
Air Combat

Jun 29

Metroid Prime 2: Echoes
Metroid Prime 2: Echoes

Jun 21

Anthology of the Killer
Anthology of the Killer

May 28

Umineko no Naku Koro ni Chiru: Episode 8 - Twilight of the Golden Witch
Umineko no Naku Koro ni Chiru: Episode 8 - Twilight of the Golden Witch

May 22

Recently Reviewed See More

“Wait for it to start doing its spin attack. Switch to Morph Ball. Boost Ball into it while it's spinning to stun it. While it's stunned, roll between its legs, and lay a bomb on its flashing weak point. When the body is destroyed, the head flies off and starts attacking. The head will have a light or dark shield; switch to the opposite colored beam to dispel it. Then you can use a Super Missile to destroy the head.”

This is me describing how to kill a Normal Non-Miniboss Enemy in one of the late game areas of Metroid Prime 2. I swear to god every fucking enemy is like this. God forbid you design an FPS enemy where the optimal strategy is “shoot it until it dies”; it always has to be some five step process to make then enemy vulnerable, then you have a half second window to shoot them (from just the right angle, of course) and finally deal Real Actual Damage.

Of course, even with all that, many enemies take three or four Super Missiles to kill. So now every encounter takes a full minute to finish, and often they’ll put three or four of these fuckers in the same room. So of course I run past every single enemy I can, because combat is a miserable ordeal with no reward, and I’ve already been through this room seven times anyway, god fucking dammit.

Don't you dare use anything besides Super Missiles or maybe the occasional charged light/dark/annihilator beam. I can't think of an FPS with a more pathetic default gun. There's almost never a good reason to use any of the non-charged shots against enemies. I counted the number of regular beam shots an extremely piddily enemy took later on -- 26 hits! What's even the point of having a beam at that point? Where are the popcorn enemies? Why is everything a painfully involved miniboss? Why do the beam combos cost so many resources when I never found a single practical use case for any of them?!

While I don’t think the combat works at all for the regular enemies, I think there’s a perverse rom hack joy to the bosses. They have all the same problems and jank as the enemies, but multiplied several times over. Every major boss is a 10+ minute encounter, and because the timing to dodge enemy attacks is much stricter here than in Prime 1, they often come down to the wire. The thing is, once you’ve beaten a boss, it’s over. And you’re generally rewarded with a cool power-up! The regular enemies are miserable because the game expects you fight them over and over for no reason. The bosses don’t have that problem.

All my most memorable moments in Prime 2 were barely scraping by at the end of the painfully long boss fights. I beat the Spider Guardian on my first try with 10 total energy to spare. If I'd taken a single additional hit, I would've died and had to start the whole grueling trial over again. The release I felt nailing each of those super-strict bomb jumps and defeating the boss was orgasmic.

The finale is epic. The Ing Emperor’s second phase is the scariest fight in the game outside maybe the Boost Guardian, and after barely scraping by that fight you still have another timed boss fight to deal with, one that’s exceptionally confusing and opaque in its execution even by this game's standards. All without any checkpoints of course. No notes, pristine conclusion.

The best thing you can say about Metroid Prime 2 is that it’s a weird, obnoxiously strict, rom hack-y sequel to Metroid Prime 1. Prime 1 was polished, streamlined, and generally pretty easy. It’s a good game that definitely called for a sequel that’s annoying in the ways Prime 2 is annoying.

Prime 2 is far too long, and the story is contrived videogame bullshit in contrast to Prime 1’s gracefully unfolding mystery. Calling it an FPS feels unfair because it invites comparisons to games where the combat is actually fun. But it has some good tunes, and in spite of (and sometimes because of) its myriad failings, it still takes you on a journey that feels substantial. There’s a catharsis to reaching its hard-won conclusion.

I definitely don’t think Retro is the best to ever do it, and I’m in no rush to revisit Prime 3. But they make games that feel like real adventures, and that’s something I’ll always appreciate.

Extremely extremely delightful. I've been savoring these over the last few months, and I finally ran through the epic finale last night. I've been playing thecatamites's games for over a decade, so it's really awesome to see so much of his style synthesized into such a dense hilarious vision.

It's cathartic because I've actually often struggled to connect with his games. thecatamites's work is focused more than anything on strong texture, loved-on spaces, and funny lyrical writing. That's all great -- but I like games with strong emotional arcs, stories that take me on dramatically pointed and specific journeys. thecatamites's games (and his criticism for that matter) don't generally seem interested in drama at all. Anything resembling a dramatic moment in his games tends to feel playful and ironically detached. In many respects our critical lenses are almost exact opposites.

I had a really negative reaction to Magic Wand when it came out for this reason; I kept expecting it to have some kind of real rpg story, and it just doesn't. Space Funeral has a neat little meta theme at the end that really resonated with me, but it's more of a cute final note than a big climax. The games of his I've enjoyed the most with are the short comic ones like Murder Dog IV, where I can focus on enjoying the texture and jokes, and they're over before I can build any lofty narrative expectations in my head.

Anthology of the Killer meets me half-way. The grand joke of these games is that thecatamites is as good as literally anyone on itch at making Eerie Haunting Dream spaces in 3D, at setting up scares, at panicky chase sequences. He speaks the language of "Unity horror game" extremely fluently -- which makes it VERY funny when BB cracks a perfectly timed hilarious joke that sucks all the tension out of the scene. (Drool of the Killer's ending sticks out to me as a particularly great moment.)

The writing is SO funny, constantly, and pairing that sense of humor with the great horror language never stops being delightful. It's also possible he was always this funny, and I was just finally disarmed and willing to fully accept his sense of humor because he fit it into a game with the most perfect cast of blorbos imaginable (I cherish ZZ).

I haven't played all of thecatamites' ouevre, in part because I've sometimes come out of his games frustrated. I feel bad about never getting around to 50 Short Games or 10 Beautiful Postcards in particular; I really want to play those. Part of me wants to end this on something like "Anthology of the Killer is thecatamites at the height of his powers," but that doesn't feel quite right. It's more like, I'm thankful that he channeled his myriad artistic strengths into a package I could personally connect to, even as someone that doesn't share all his values as a creator and player.

God I'm tired... pretty good ending though. I can see how folks got pissed off back when it released, but I was already Very Mad at the end of ep 6 and 7 and pretty checked out. A lot of this ep surprised and delighted me in comparison. Once I'd found my solid ground (a character I like is on the literal precipice of an important choice) I could finally just roll with the story and enjoy it, I found the stakes and could enjoy the magic finally.

It's a good ending to a different visual novel. I think he figured out too late what his story was REALLY about and couldn't go back to edit the earlier eps 'cause they were already released. Umi feels at war with itself on the mystery/truth stuff, I just don't think it's all the way there. But like, I ended eps 6 and 7 really pissed off and thinking this whole thing was a disaster, "not all the way there" is a big upgrade from that.

I thought ep 8 would reveal once and for all that the mystery box was empty, that the story really didn't have a heart; instead it did the opposite. I'm glad I stuck it out and read the last two eps. If you're willing to do a lot of the work yourself (too much IMO) and fill in the gaps I can see being really moved by it.

Ultimately still too little too late for me, sorry. I hate getting jerked around and umi Jerks You Around. And christ alive why is it 120 hours long. "In retrospect that holds together in a pretty neat way" isn't what I want out of an eight book series -- I want to fully enjoy it as I'm actually reading it, like I did with ryukishi's previous series.

It's never gonna be one of my faves but I can understand and appreciate why friends adore it now. If you tell people to skip higurashi and read umineko first then we're Eternal Enemies though.