gayolly
I respect this game for being incredibly ambitious for the NES era, pretty much the grandaddy of the metroidvania games in the series. In that regard it's fascinating, seeing the developers experimenting with what worked and what didn't back when the "rules" of game design were still being written on the fly.
But it's just not that fun to actually play, frustratingly cryptic hints and those FUCKING SLOW MOTION TEXT BOXES grind the pacing to a halt.
I think as a piece of history it's neat, the atmosphere is legitimately haunting (the final walk to Castlevania, empty and run down is nostalgic and eerie in equal measure) and the soundtrack is as excellent as ever. But it's not something I'd ever have any desire to play again.
But it's just not that fun to actually play, frustratingly cryptic hints and those FUCKING SLOW MOTION TEXT BOXES grind the pacing to a halt.
I think as a piece of history it's neat, the atmosphere is legitimately haunting (the final walk to Castlevania, empty and run down is nostalgic and eerie in equal measure) and the soundtrack is as excellent as ever. But it's not something I'd ever have any desire to play again.
1986
the difficulty is just on the edge from "tough but fair" to "fucking bullshit" but it's an NES game that's still fun to play today and that in of itself is an achievement
music still kicks ass too
music still kicks ass too
"Cowabunga... Cow-a-FUCKIN' PIECE OF DOGSHIT! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick! This game is as appealing as a fucking ooze-infested dirty fucking sewer rat shit! I've had more fun playing with dog turds! Shredder's my ass and Splinter's my balls, this game is an inside-out asshole regurgitated putrid anal fecal matter! I'd rather fucking yank all the hairs out of my scrotum! I'd rather drink diarrhea vomited out of a buffalo's anus! It sucking fucks, it fucking sucks, IT FUCKING BLOWS, IT'S A PIECE OF SHIT...and I don't like it." - James Rolfe
1987
The arcade version of Contra is like the first season of the Simpsons. Neat to look at from a historical perspective but otherwise not worth revisiting in insert current year.
An unapologetic quarter muncher (full disclosure i saved state the fuck out of both my playthroughs), the actual basic run n gunning can still be pretty satisfying, but the sequel, NES port and future entries all did everything much better.
An unapologetic quarter muncher (full disclosure i saved state the fuck out of both my playthroughs), the actual basic run n gunning can still be pretty satisfying, but the sequel, NES port and future entries all did everything much better.
2022
the best balance of action and horror since the original F.E.A.R, a masterpiece