EDIT: i don't really love this game as i haven't thought about it once after beating it, but i'm going to leave my old review up for preservation i guess.

Didn't expect this to be a last-minute addition to my sleeper hits of the year but it was so much fun that I couldn't leave it out!

It's as if the formula of Sonic Mania was applied to the Turtles' beat-em-ups from the 80s/90s. I DID NOT LIKE the original arcade game, it felt very restrictive and unfair. This may have been extremely easy (we got our first game over on the final boss) but it's varied, has a ton of fun characters, is absolutely packed full of charm and appeal, and is overall a perfect Game Pass multiplayer time - just hop in and out with your friends! I was only able to play this with my brother, but I can imagine a 6-player playthrough would be incredible.

DISCLAIMER: my thoughts have changed pretty dramatically on this game since i wrote my original review. I'm leaving it here but my updated thoughts are at the end.

One fateful day in my freshman year of high school, I saw a silly little YouTube video titled, "Xenoblade Chronicles in a Nutshell". It was just a compilation of many characters saying "Monado" and some funny battle or in-field voice lines, but it interested me enough to warrant checking out the game. I didn't want to pay for $60+ a Wii copy, so I just watched some cutscenes and did research and all of that, becoming more and more engrossed in the game over time. I eventually ended up trying Xenoblade 2 when I got my Switch, and the rest is history.

I was SUPER excited for the release of the third game - its concept and themes looked amazing, and it was easily going to be the best project that Monolith Soft ever put out! It didn't quite turn out like that, but it still ended up pretty great in the end.

It's weird, I recognize Xenoblade 3 is "objectively" a better game than the first, but for me there are two critical aspects that keep it back from my favorites list.
First of all, 3's actual story is...not very good. Don't get me wrong, the main characters are fantastic, with genuinely the single best party in the entire JRPG genre. Every one of them bounces off of eachother, is given relatively equal screentime (when you consider the side content, anyway), and feels so alive compared to many of the competition, even within the same franchise. They're all so charming and they're my little srcunklos 🥺. But since the majority of the game consists of "walk here, villian of the week shows up, deal with them," there's very little room for significant plot development. Xenoblade 1 always felt like the plot was moving forward and constantly messing with your expectations, while this game feels rather aimless and without direction for most of it. It also doesn't help that the vast majority of Moebius' cast is incredibly cheesy and one-dimensional, but oh well.
Another big factor for me is the world design. It's easily the best designed from a gameplay standpoint - there's so many QoL changes and design decisions that feel good, but it lacks the shear imagination and awe that the first two's titans provided. I get it, that's the point, this world isn't SUPPOSED to "make sense," but it simply doesn't feel as legendary to explore as the Bionis and Mechonis did to me.
The final major criticism I have towards the game isn't the fault of the developers, but rather Nintendo. PLEASE UPGRADE YOUR POTATO HARDWARE. YOUR DEVELOPERS ARE DYING OVER HERE. The game can still be beautiful and incredibly impressive, but it's still severely limited by the horribly weak system it's tied to. Footage running on Yuzu at 4K 60 is genuinely amazing, and I overwhelmingly wish the game was built for (at least) a PS4 in mind instead of the Switch.

But yeah, aside from that, this rules. Easily the most fun and customizable combat of the series (I'm never going to be able to go back to only being able to play as one character in combat again!), beautiful art design, an incredible soundtrack, great voice direction, stunning cutscene direction (for the big ones anyway), an interesting exploration of its themes, customization leagues above Nintendo's other offerings, and a substantial upgrade to sidequests to make them feel that much more important to the world you're saving.

I think what Xenoblade 3 truly excels at is nailing the important moments in the story. All of the "biggest" cinematics are presented at a level of polish unseen for the franchise, and they easily can hit the hardest. The ending of Chapter 1, the exchanging of flutes halfway through the journey, the O&P fight in Chapter 4, that one scene in the city (you know the one), the ENTIRE PRISON SEQUENCE in 5&6, and of course, the incredibly climatic and satisfying final boss. Even if I was disappointed by the actual plot content, these stellar moments still kept the game exciting and emotional to experience, right up through the credits.

Do I think it's frustrating that the game exceeded at seemingly everything besides having a great story? Yes. Very much so. But even despite that, I can't deny that I had an incredibly fun time in this world, and that it was worth the 100+ hour investment I spent.

And for the record, yass, Eunie's the buss.

EDIT: When I wrote this review I considered it a 4.5/5 thanks to the stellar aspects it has inside of it. But, tragic news. This game has aged so poorly for me man. The halfbaked worldbuilding, the godawful story, the painfully boring exploration, the bloated-to-the-point-of-crumbling customization and combat. It still has the BEST main party of characters I've ever seen in a JRPG and easily some of the best cutscene direction & moments in the franchise, but my god, they CANNOT carry the rest. I still think it's a good-ass game with plenty of fun & emotional moments, but there's no way in hell I can label this series as my favorite in gaming anymore. The ONLY one I genuinely adore is Xenoblade 1 at this point. No way am I picking up the DLC for this, as I've heard its main focus is fanservice and I just want to move on greener pastures at this point.

It's Super Metroid.

It has some clunky controls, some moments of confusing design, and a severe lack of QoL enhancements, but it's Super Metroid. It's 29 years old and still so full of modern-day world design. The fact that after all this time it stands as one of the defining titles of the genre it singlehandedly spawned into existence is nothing short of a MIRACLE. It's still so smart, so fun to explore, and so full of surprises. It guides you silently and teases with your expectations at every left corner. At a time when games seem hell-bent on helping you every step of the way, Super Metroid wants YOU to be the explorer charting through Planet Zebes. And it's still so refreshing after all these years. It's Super Metroid. It's. SUPER. METROID.

Yeah I still prefer Hollow Knight but I'm still blown away by this little gem. I couldn't be happier that so many games in its style exist now, and the Metroid series is finally on stable legs (again). See you next mission, Samus!

Fusion is basically the exact opposite of Super in every single way. It's narrow and confined. It holds your hand practically the entire game and gates off exploration. It tales a straight up cinematic story (for the GBA anyway) with dialogue and cutscenes. And, most importantly, it completely reverses the role of the badass space warrior.

It should have been a catastrophic failure, but this bold experiment is easily the most distinct game in the franchise because of it. Oh, and it's pretty great. And scary. Pretty damn scary.

I do not envy the position of Metroid's developers after Super Metroid's release. How the hell do you possibly follow up one of the greatest video games of all time, a title so monumentally original and smart that it kickstarted an entire genre of games unto itself? With Fusion, they sook to flip Metroid on its head, creating a linear, cinematic, and railroaded experience. It was a little clunky but for the GBA it was easily the best solution. But how about the Nintendo Switch? What do you do when it's been 20 years since the last purely original title in the 2D entries and you have to bring this relatively obscure series to the limelight? Why, you simply mix the best of Super and Fusion.

The perfect balance of massively labyrinthine while linear to a T. The purification of the Dread (heh) and fear of Fusion's chase segments. The always-rewarding sense of item collection and expansive movement sandbox that Super had. Plus, to top it all off, the most BADASS presentation of Samus we've EVER had. OH AND ALSO, easily the hardest game in the series so far, because why not :P

Samus Returns wasn't anything to write home about but Mercury Steam COMPLETELY blew me away with this love letter to the franchise. They not only successfully showed that 2D AAA games CAN and SHOULD remain relevant this far into the 3D game sphere, but they also created the perfect end to this five-game narrative that Samus Aran has journeyed through. Sure, the level theming is kinda boring and the music genuinely sounds AI-generated, but does that even matter when the rest of the game goes so hard?? I'm so happy I played through these five titles and finally experienced this series that I've been SLEEPING ON for so long. MOVE OVER XENOBLADE, METROID IS MY NEW FAVORITE NINTENDO SERIES. LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Edit: ok fine i brought it down half a star because the areas' visual designs stink, the soundtrack is a complete joke, and i can't remember a single area from this game a few months later. it still ROCKS to play, tho.

I love cinema. I love games! I don't love overtly cinematic games! I think a decent chunk of the AAA game industry, particularly Sony's studios these days, has leaned so far into this style that it's really limited their potential. Games shouldn't try to copy film; they should take advantage of games as a medium and use their interactive nature to enhance an experience rather than copying an existing format. With all that said, surely I'd think this is an overrated albeit good game, right? It's not exactly filled with depth, it has tons of slow walking and ladder "puzzles", and the exploration isn't exactly thrilling either. But, despite ALL of my feelings about this, I can't deny one essential fact.

This was an emotional experience that I have never felt before within the medium of games.

As much as the Uncharted series can pull off balls-to-the-walls action and make sure you have a blast, The Last of Us barrels into the far opposite direction. Games are "supposed" to be fun, but I'd argue this is the most powerful example of how games as a medium can explore other areas of your psyche. The tension, fear, and eventually calm relief you feel before and after every enemy encounter never ends. The bond you grow with your new daughter only grows stronger with every narrow escape or cute moment that can somehow come out of this desolate hellscape. The overwhelming peace as you and her look out into the landscape ahead of you, beautiful and serene despite the dangers you both know lie hiding.

There isn't anything super special about The Last of Us 10 years after it released. In 2013 I could easily see an argument made for it being one of the greatest games of all time, but the landscape has changed a bit since then, and its downsides have started to reveal themselves more too. But even then...does any of that matter? There are so many nitpicks and problems I can have but none of that even matters when my experience with this title was so unique. I think this might be experienced best as a story in the HBO show (which I haven't seen yet) but there's something not even Pedro Pascal can provide: Ellie is in YOUR care. It's YOUR job to keep her safe. The remaining scraps of humanity in this broken world, the last of US, need her to save us all. But in the end...who needs her more? The world...or you?