zachmaycry
2008
feels like the rough draft for a failed revolution.
the platforming and sign-posting is smooth for the most part. the rough edges around the parkour gameplay that are there feel like they were intended to be fixed in forthcoming sequels that unfortunately never eventuated.
the story feels glued on, or in this case, crudely animated and inserted in. the game didn't really need a plot or heavy characterisation. what's left feels like a half-thought idea scribbled on a napkin.
and that's the frustrating problem with mirror's edge. everything feels half thought out; half fleshed out. or like every idea was walked back to make it more marketable in a post Modern Warfare shooter market. nothing other than parkour movement and maybe the bold primary colour palette feels particularly cared for or loved and laboured over.
a lot of mirror's edge leaves me saying "what if?". what if this game had a more fleshed out lore or setting or characters. what if had a more engaging plot. what if the combat were a little smoother to match your movements, instead of this precision, time-based crap. what if there no guns or shooting. faith doesn't feel like a murderer. the guns have no hud elements; no ammo counts. they are designed to encumber your movement and your ledge-grabbing. there's clearly some conscious element at play regarding gun violence and typical video game combat. what if i didn't make this game, or someone like me, because everything about reminds me of every poorly thought idea i've had, and the lack of connective tissue between concept and execution made me sit up and point at my tv several times like the rick dalton once upon a time in hollywood meme, like, "hey i recognise this kind of creative failure!"
anyway. the colours are cool, and when you find the game's flow state (which is often less than you'd like) and moving and jumping without flaw, the game shines as bright as any action game i've played. it's a shame it's a formula that wasn't sanded down to perfection and we never got the holy grail (or Casino Royale) of free-running games. maybe one day. because this a great template for a more pacifist form of video game action/violence. instead now we get a battlefield every few years.
the platforming and sign-posting is smooth for the most part. the rough edges around the parkour gameplay that are there feel like they were intended to be fixed in forthcoming sequels that unfortunately never eventuated.
the story feels glued on, or in this case, crudely animated and inserted in. the game didn't really need a plot or heavy characterisation. what's left feels like a half-thought idea scribbled on a napkin.
and that's the frustrating problem with mirror's edge. everything feels half thought out; half fleshed out. or like every idea was walked back to make it more marketable in a post Modern Warfare shooter market. nothing other than parkour movement and maybe the bold primary colour palette feels particularly cared for or loved and laboured over.
a lot of mirror's edge leaves me saying "what if?". what if this game had a more fleshed out lore or setting or characters. what if had a more engaging plot. what if the combat were a little smoother to match your movements, instead of this precision, time-based crap. what if there no guns or shooting. faith doesn't feel like a murderer. the guns have no hud elements; no ammo counts. they are designed to encumber your movement and your ledge-grabbing. there's clearly some conscious element at play regarding gun violence and typical video game combat. what if i didn't make this game, or someone like me, because everything about reminds me of every poorly thought idea i've had, and the lack of connective tissue between concept and execution made me sit up and point at my tv several times like the rick dalton once upon a time in hollywood meme, like, "hey i recognise this kind of creative failure!"
anyway. the colours are cool, and when you find the game's flow state (which is often less than you'd like) and moving and jumping without flaw, the game shines as bright as any action game i've played. it's a shame it's a formula that wasn't sanded down to perfection and we never got the holy grail (or Casino Royale) of free-running games. maybe one day. because this a great template for a more pacifist form of video game action/violence. instead now we get a battlefield every few years.
there are parts that feel stolen right out of uncharted and the last of us that i thought really rocked and worked for a call of duty game.
and then there are parts that were lifted and remixed from old call of duties that felt staid and boring.
by the end i felt exactly as entertained as i felt bored. there is a futurama episode where bender meets God and God exclaims, "if you do something right no one will think you've done anything at all" and that's kind of what this game feels like.
felt actually like an amalgamation of several different mindsets at play to the point it loses all identity. it wants to be zero dark thirty and sicario but it's a game where the cover character wears a skull mask in every setting. it's a game that's like "we can't do anything with the villain because of laws" and then throws them out the window later on hoping you've forgotten that. i've written a review like this before where i've said, as an expert in being a dumb person and a bad writer, i can spot dumb, lazy writing a mile away, modern warfare ii has all the hallmarks that. it's the equivalent of that horse drawing meme that starts of super realistic and in each installment becomes sloppier and sloppier until it resembles a blind child's depiction of a horse. you could extrapolate some political takeaways from this but at this point it'd be in vain because it contradicts itself through its sheer contempt for basic coherent consistently.
ultimately i think despite looking like a billion dollars it just doesn't play any better than any other call of duty. and i think it's disappointing it fails to really remember what made the first modern warfare 2 so good - the commitment to michael bay levels of balls to the wall action (it gets there in spurts but it's almost more of a reboot of the 2010 medal of honor game than the og mw2).
and then there are parts that were lifted and remixed from old call of duties that felt staid and boring.
by the end i felt exactly as entertained as i felt bored. there is a futurama episode where bender meets God and God exclaims, "if you do something right no one will think you've done anything at all" and that's kind of what this game feels like.
felt actually like an amalgamation of several different mindsets at play to the point it loses all identity. it wants to be zero dark thirty and sicario but it's a game where the cover character wears a skull mask in every setting. it's a game that's like "we can't do anything with the villain because of laws" and then throws them out the window later on hoping you've forgotten that. i've written a review like this before where i've said, as an expert in being a dumb person and a bad writer, i can spot dumb, lazy writing a mile away, modern warfare ii has all the hallmarks that. it's the equivalent of that horse drawing meme that starts of super realistic and in each installment becomes sloppier and sloppier until it resembles a blind child's depiction of a horse. you could extrapolate some political takeaways from this but at this point it'd be in vain because it contradicts itself through its sheer contempt for basic coherent consistently.
ultimately i think despite looking like a billion dollars it just doesn't play any better than any other call of duty. and i think it's disappointing it fails to really remember what made the first modern warfare 2 so good - the commitment to michael bay levels of balls to the wall action (it gets there in spurts but it's almost more of a reboot of the 2010 medal of honor game than the og mw2).
the sincere hyper stylisation makes for a sharper criticism of the ps3/360 era middle-eastern shooter than Spec Ops the Line's preachiness. additionally, blood on the sand's maximalism serves as a send up of its combat inspiration, Gears of War, by simply not being as dreary to look at. it also sort of feels like the underside of the rock that is Uncharted. Uncharted, a series that presents itself as a sparking gem to everyone who passes by, but if you stopped to lift it over, you'd see an ugliness that is basically blood in the sand.
this is the kind of game they don't make any more. licensed AAA shooting games starring rappers, for one. this kind of trashy hyper stylisation and linear gaminess is maybe really only seen in Devil May Cry and Bayonetta today too. it kind of reminded me of famed music video director, Hype Williams' lone feature film, Belly. I am waiting to see contemporary cinema and hip hop culture to converge in such a spectacular fashion again but it seems like it promises never to be. blood on the sand, likewise, feels like a once a lifetime piece of culture.
this is the kind of game they don't make any more. licensed AAA shooting games starring rappers, for one. this kind of trashy hyper stylisation and linear gaminess is maybe really only seen in Devil May Cry and Bayonetta today too. it kind of reminded me of famed music video director, Hype Williams' lone feature film, Belly. I am waiting to see contemporary cinema and hip hop culture to converge in such a spectacular fashion again but it seems like it promises never to be. blood on the sand, likewise, feels like a once a lifetime piece of culture.
after spending two months playing mostly ps4/5 games, going back to a blocky, linear, grimey ps3 era game was a real treat.
but i think i gotta divorce myself from the good vibes i get from simply playing this because at heart all i did was feel like dogshit for 4 days mercilessly beating up the poor and insane. batman, it struck me for maybe the first time, is the absolute embodiment of American imperialism. superman is the pretty face and the promised ideal but batman is the guerilla by night; the tightly knit, highly efficient machine with vast resources. if his parents murder is pearl harbour, then he is the atom bomb and the influence after that.
at one point in this game, batman (and calling him Batman, like that's his name, or could be a name, like on par with Dave or Jake or something, never fails to crack me up) has to get across a large gap. so he calls in for a tool to do the job, and this tool arrives via a remote controlled drone that crashes through the glass ceiling and delivers itself. at that moment i was like Batman absolutely terrifies me.
sucks i'mma have to play three more of these but i am who i am.
but i think i gotta divorce myself from the good vibes i get from simply playing this because at heart all i did was feel like dogshit for 4 days mercilessly beating up the poor and insane. batman, it struck me for maybe the first time, is the absolute embodiment of American imperialism. superman is the pretty face and the promised ideal but batman is the guerilla by night; the tightly knit, highly efficient machine with vast resources. if his parents murder is pearl harbour, then he is the atom bomb and the influence after that.
at one point in this game, batman (and calling him Batman, like that's his name, or could be a name, like on par with Dave or Jake or something, never fails to crack me up) has to get across a large gap. so he calls in for a tool to do the job, and this tool arrives via a remote controlled drone that crashes through the glass ceiling and delivers itself. at that moment i was like Batman absolutely terrifies me.
sucks i'mma have to play three more of these but i am who i am.
2013
There's a certain kind of gamebro desire for thee modern open world crime game. One so realstic you can get audited for not doing your taxes, and date in-game e-girls and live the life you feel you're not quite equipped for in the real world. The macho nerd's escapist fantasy.
Playing GTA V for the first time in nine years, I'm more impressed with its recreation of modern Los Angeles than I was at the time of release. It "holds up" remarkably well, still maybe the king of the castle as far as open world games go. The depth of detail is still really impressive. I get lost just walking around looking at the cracks in the footpath, the trash littering the streets, the pedestrian and traffic AI and the way they'll give me the finger if I rev my engine at a stop light. It's in a word, 'impressive'. It's closest gaming has gotten to creating that escapist fantasy. I could feel myself wanting to just live inside the game; drive around a picturesque Los Angeles in a nice car, buy some sick suits, some flashy guns and live the American dream of looking cool and owning destructive property.
And that's ultimately what GTA V is: a game with a pretty setting you're there to destroy (not actually admire or live in); itself a pretty piece of technology made through backbacking labour practices.
It's all kind of a vapid nothing. This is fully emphasised whenever anybody - a main character, side character, or NPC - speaks in this game. Not simply because there's no charming or quietly interesting dialogue (if anything, it is an actively terribly written game - a shame for a game full of long driving-and-talking scenes), or that the voice acting is bad, but because characters are such functioning non-entity cliches. A game written by an AI with the brain of a 14-year-old British boy with only the cultural knowledge of America via Michael Mann movies, The Sopranos and Superbad. It's a pity because I feel like there's a lot of potential with the various intertwining protagonist story structure and the allure of cool action setpieces with all the hesists in the game (most of which are just the same Heat scene told from different angles over and over).
I played this - and only this - for the entire month of August, in a state of depression, while doing a lot of E, listening to Frank Ocean and rewatching Breaking Bad. All in all I found it rather soothing. I'm not going to look back on my time fondly with it but I am kind of sad and at a loss now that it's over. I wish it were a better game. I wish I lived in LA for real.
Playing GTA V for the first time in nine years, I'm more impressed with its recreation of modern Los Angeles than I was at the time of release. It "holds up" remarkably well, still maybe the king of the castle as far as open world games go. The depth of detail is still really impressive. I get lost just walking around looking at the cracks in the footpath, the trash littering the streets, the pedestrian and traffic AI and the way they'll give me the finger if I rev my engine at a stop light. It's in a word, 'impressive'. It's closest gaming has gotten to creating that escapist fantasy. I could feel myself wanting to just live inside the game; drive around a picturesque Los Angeles in a nice car, buy some sick suits, some flashy guns and live the American dream of looking cool and owning destructive property.
And that's ultimately what GTA V is: a game with a pretty setting you're there to destroy (not actually admire or live in); itself a pretty piece of technology made through backbacking labour practices.
It's all kind of a vapid nothing. This is fully emphasised whenever anybody - a main character, side character, or NPC - speaks in this game. Not simply because there's no charming or quietly interesting dialogue (if anything, it is an actively terribly written game - a shame for a game full of long driving-and-talking scenes), or that the voice acting is bad, but because characters are such functioning non-entity cliches. A game written by an AI with the brain of a 14-year-old British boy with only the cultural knowledge of America via Michael Mann movies, The Sopranos and Superbad. It's a pity because I feel like there's a lot of potential with the various intertwining protagonist story structure and the allure of cool action setpieces with all the hesists in the game (most of which are just the same Heat scene told from different angles over and over).
I played this - and only this - for the entire month of August, in a state of depression, while doing a lot of E, listening to Frank Ocean and rewatching Breaking Bad. All in all I found it rather soothing. I'm not going to look back on my time fondly with it but I am kind of sad and at a loss now that it's over. I wish it were a better game. I wish I lived in LA for real.
i don't even think games like 50 Cent: Blood on the Sand and Metal Gear Rising Revengeance are half as insane as this simply because this actually cost a lot of money. they spent $200m on marketing a game where you massacre civilians in an airport about two hours in; a game where you receive quotes from, among others, Confucius and Dick Cheney on your death screen; a game that climaxes with the protagonist wrenching a knife out of their gut to throw at the bad guy.
replaying this for the first time in maybe a decade and just mouth agape through the whole thing. it's not a good game. but i kinda love it. played the campaign so much as a teenager listening to Metallica's Death Magnetic that the whole thing feels glued to my being. it's a problematic fave. i'll go the grave loving it, knowing full well i am going to hell for doing so.
replaying this for the first time in maybe a decade and just mouth agape through the whole thing. it's not a good game. but i kinda love it. played the campaign so much as a teenager listening to Metallica's Death Magnetic that the whole thing feels glued to my being. it's a problematic fave. i'll go the grave loving it, knowing full well i am going to hell for doing so.
2010
It's kind of the "Free Bird" of video games. It's thematically thin, but just fatalitic enough to feel poetic. It's a cornerstone of modern American AAA games the way Free Bird is a cornerstone of 70s rock. Both a very much for Your Dad. And its legacy is ultimately tied to its vastness.
Just as Free Bird goes on and on and crescendos with a long guitar solo, so does Red Dead Redemption go on and on and then crescendos spectacularly... although crescendo is the wrong word. This isn't a game that leads to a big, violent set piece, but rather leads a series of quiet domestic chores as you reacclimate to life around the family farm. But in contrast to how loud much of the preceding game is, it feels a bit like a crescendo, like an inverted guitar solo.
I do wish this game wasn't so cartoonish. It feels like a game that could easily bare more of its soul. Red Dead Redemption 2 certainly comes closer to doing that. But here, just about every mission from after you leave Bonnie's ranch until you get back to Blackwater is filled with nonsense comic characters, with a few exceptions (Marshal, Landon, Luisa). Nothing wrong with having a sense of humour but in a game that's attempting to be as sombre and "authentic" as this is, the stereotypes just feel lazy and insecure.
Anyway. Good ending. I liked riding around the old west. And when I first played this I wasn't a very big gamer and it spurred 16 year old me on. I still have a poster of Bonnie on the wall of my old room. I don't know that I'll ever be able to NOT see through all of this game's warts.
Just as Free Bird goes on and on and crescendos with a long guitar solo, so does Red Dead Redemption go on and on and then crescendos spectacularly... although crescendo is the wrong word. This isn't a game that leads to a big, violent set piece, but rather leads a series of quiet domestic chores as you reacclimate to life around the family farm. But in contrast to how loud much of the preceding game is, it feels a bit like a crescendo, like an inverted guitar solo.
I do wish this game wasn't so cartoonish. It feels like a game that could easily bare more of its soul. Red Dead Redemption 2 certainly comes closer to doing that. But here, just about every mission from after you leave Bonnie's ranch until you get back to Blackwater is filled with nonsense comic characters, with a few exceptions (Marshal, Landon, Luisa). Nothing wrong with having a sense of humour but in a game that's attempting to be as sombre and "authentic" as this is, the stereotypes just feel lazy and insecure.
Anyway. Good ending. I liked riding around the old west. And when I first played this I wasn't a very big gamer and it spurred 16 year old me on. I still have a poster of Bonnie on the wall of my old room. I don't know that I'll ever be able to NOT see through all of this game's warts.
2022
This review contains spoilers
I was hoping for a Last of Us 2 sense of dour self seriousness, with the scale of Shadow of the Colossus, a sprinkle of the challenging Baby Souls-like gameplay of Jedi Fallen Order, and the urgency of what a one-shot camera and 'Ragnarok' subtitle imply.
Instead, it's basically just Marvel's Guardians of the Galaxy redo. Same kind of ragtag motley crüe. Similar late 2000s PC wallpaper aesthetic. Similiar kind of after school special writing and tone. Similiar repetitive gameplay. Same meta fakeout credits scene at one point.
My expectations aside, playing this just felt like a chore. The way the gameplay loop is set up. Get some dialogue about how killing is bad. Leap over a rock. Press O to shimmy through a wall. Swing a weapon to nonchalantly dismember some googly monsters while your companions tell you if you're on fire or not. Leave combat arena. Do a light puzzle, get a shiny do-dad. Repeat.
And sure, that's generally how video games go. But because of the slavish devotion to the one shot camera, the game has this very long, drawn out feel. The in-game walk n talks are expository dumps and always feels calculated and robotic, never naturalistic anf in step with the rhythm of the game. The fast travel feels that way too, always timed to end when the convo dies. And the game just feels like it's artificiality padded, all the little elemental puzzles in my way feel there to keep me around another hour. There's no fluidity to the combat.
This would he fine for me if the story was good but it's just as rigid and cliche as the game itself. No surprises. Every line that's walked feels like the perfect script one writes in their head when one imagines themselves after the therapy the plan to take one day. Kratos' authentic edge has been smoothed completely out. He says all the right things and feels all the right things. Atreus misbehaves but all in the good ways one would like their rebellious child to misbehave. Sure, he strays from the path, but he's quick to see the err of his ways and reign himself back in. Freya's rage toned down as well, and what could have been an interesting dramatic web to untangle becomes just another edge sanded away to make room for a simplistic stop the bad man story. The bad man being Odin, another character completely underwritten. There's just no edge to any of this. It feels utterly without consequence.
Instead, it's basically just Marvel's Guardians of the Galaxy redo. Same kind of ragtag motley crüe. Similar late 2000s PC wallpaper aesthetic. Similiar kind of after school special writing and tone. Similiar repetitive gameplay. Same meta fakeout credits scene at one point.
My expectations aside, playing this just felt like a chore. The way the gameplay loop is set up. Get some dialogue about how killing is bad. Leap over a rock. Press O to shimmy through a wall. Swing a weapon to nonchalantly dismember some googly monsters while your companions tell you if you're on fire or not. Leave combat arena. Do a light puzzle, get a shiny do-dad. Repeat.
And sure, that's generally how video games go. But because of the slavish devotion to the one shot camera, the game has this very long, drawn out feel. The in-game walk n talks are expository dumps and always feels calculated and robotic, never naturalistic anf in step with the rhythm of the game. The fast travel feels that way too, always timed to end when the convo dies. And the game just feels like it's artificiality padded, all the little elemental puzzles in my way feel there to keep me around another hour. There's no fluidity to the combat.
This would he fine for me if the story was good but it's just as rigid and cliche as the game itself. No surprises. Every line that's walked feels like the perfect script one writes in their head when one imagines themselves after the therapy the plan to take one day. Kratos' authentic edge has been smoothed completely out. He says all the right things and feels all the right things. Atreus misbehaves but all in the good ways one would like their rebellious child to misbehave. Sure, he strays from the path, but he's quick to see the err of his ways and reign himself back in. Freya's rage toned down as well, and what could have been an interesting dramatic web to untangle becomes just another edge sanded away to make room for a simplistic stop the bad man story. The bad man being Odin, another character completely underwritten. There's just no edge to any of this. It feels utterly without consequence.