Reviews from

in the past


Story and characters did nothing for me (I have never played a Valkyrie Profile game) and I thought most of the level designs were pretty dull, but MAN the combat is so fun and satisfying that it never got old for the 11ish hours the main quest took to finish. Recommend if on sale, I suppose.

I had a whole schpeal for this game I was planning to put a well meaning couple of paragraphs summarizing where I personally think this game went right and wrong. It was very precise in my eyes trying to cut to the lack of commitment this game had to really engaging you on any level be it story, gameplay, aesthetics, etc. It was all very robotic which I thought would fit the games overall mediocrity. I then realized that I would simply be drowned out in a sea of people on extreme sides of views on this game. So I threw that out, instead putting this meaningless, poorly thought out, off the dome "review" onto this god forsaken website. It's as reflective of the game as it can from my view

This game looked to have potential in it's initial trailer and when I saw it was on sale I went ahead and gave it a shot, as indicated by my playtime I was not very impressed.

I've played through the tutorial and the first 5 minutes of the first area and I can already tell that this game is not going to get very interesting at any point. Everything about the game just screams 'bland'.
The gameplay, story, music and world all seemed of 'eh' quality, where it's not bad per se but it's obvious it's never going to get any kind of intricate.

As such I decided that my time is better of spent elsewhere.

Eu sabia que Valkyrie Elysium seria um JRPG tier B, no máximo. pelos trailers e tudo de informação que saiu era visível que seria um game relativamente "pequeno" e simples, então eu já esperava que não seria nada "grandioso", ainda assim tudo que via dele me empolgava e, acho que valeu demais a espera, estou bem mais do que satisfeito; prova melhor é que gastei mais de 40 horas em um jogo com duração de 15 no máximo.

Mas enfim, vamos as considerações do porque acho ele um ótimo game e "seus" defeitos.

Acho que a melhor forma de começar a falar de Valkyrie Elysium, é pela sua gameplay. O jogo é frenético e suas mecânicas, funcionas e incrivelmente bem otimizadas de forma que tudo que você faz em questão de jogabilidade é rápido, eficiente e acima de tudo te passa um ótimo game feel. E o jogo te oferece diversas formas pra criar essa otimização, isso vai desde as armas onde cada uma é única com inúmeras habilidades e muda completamente seu estilo de jogo, até habilidades passivas e ativas da personagem que vão te ajudar a ter a experiência que você achar melhor nas lutas, já que você pode escolher com quais quer, ou não quer jogar ativas e isso abre um leque de opções enorme. E todas essas habilidades são únicas e funcionais; tudo que envolve o combate nesse jogo é perfeito, progressão de força, sistema de magias e habilidades tanto das armas quanto da personagem, é tudo muito bem planejado e funcional, o combate de Valkyrie Elsylium é de longe um dos meus favoritos dos JRPGs e eu com certeza ainda vou passar um bom tempo nele até pegar o 100% porque vale muito a pena.

Partindo pra narrativa e outras coisas envolvendo construção de mundo, e etc; não há muito o que acrescentar. A história é relativamente simplória, mas muito bem contada apesar das limitações de ferramentas para fazer isso, muito da construção de personagens por exemplo fica a cargo de aquivos com áudio e de conversas entre eles que dependem de certos lugares do mapa, algo que achei super criativo e remedia demais a falta verba que provavelmente tiveram pra fazer algo mais elaborado, além de que, o voice action Japonês é absurdo de bom, jogar com voz em qualquer outro idioma é um baita erro aqui. A construção de mundo em si também é ótima dentro do que era possível e eu realmente amo essa reinvenção da mitologia Nordica, a arte é maravilhosa e cria um estilo muito único, algo que o jogo tem de sobra e eu admiro muito isso. Valkyrie Elysium tem diversas inspirações mas, em momento algum o jogo tenta seguir uma tendência ou ser parecido com qualquer outro, ele é único por si só e isso é mais um de seus méritos.

Agora vamos a única coisa que pra mim foi um tremendo erro. O jogo possui quatro finais, até aí tudo bem, o problema começa quando um desses finais (que por incrível que pareça é o único realmente bom e relevante) se torna uma frustração de se fazer dependendo da forma de como você jogou. Pra pegar esse final basicamente você precisa completar um colecionável que é também, super importante pra história. Acontece que é praticamente impossível uma pessoa terminar o game com eles completo, o que implica em você rejogar todos os capítulos onde você não os coletou e tudo bem, são poucos, no jogo+ é fácil, e não são difíceis de achar, ainda assim é uma chateação, eu mesmo que explorei cada canto do jogo tive problemas. Se fosse um final qualquer seria ok, mas não, é um elemento que esconde o maior segredo das história e que libera o final mais relevante, não faz sentido e não é justo limitar a história assim, nem todo mundo vai ir atrás disso e acho uma grande pena, porque é a melhor parte da história, enfim, nem tudo é perfeito.


Bom, acho que é isso, há esse erro grotesco quanto ao final mas, é algo que consigo relevar facilmente porque todo o resto é simplesmente perfeito dentro da proposta e das limitações. Valkyrie Elysium é a melhor prova de que dá pra fazer um JRPG incrível mesmo com um baixo orçamento, basta ser criativo e bem feito.


Super Recomendo!

Fun for what it was.

It's not perfect, but I enjoyed my time with it.


Had a ton of fun with this one. Still would like to go back and get more trophies. Definitely got a lot more out of this one than expected and glad I took a chance on it!

I really wanted to stick up for this game, it's a new entry in the Valkyrie Profile series hopeful in expanding the series to include newer, more modern gameplay styles. However, as a newcomer to the series I feel like I'm getting a terrible first impression. I find the combat incredibly solid and fun to mess around with, especially on a Dualsense, but I just cannot connect with the story whatsoever. It's so nothing, there's so little care or budget given to its presentation that it just comes off feeling Blah, and maybe playing this directly after finishing Final Fantasy XII was a death knell. Maybe I'm being unfair, but either way I'm not in a space whatsoever to be impressed by this game. There just isn't enough substance. I'm reminded of Shin Sakura Wars from 2020, where another Cool Ass JRPG Series finally got a new game and it just fell flat in the mission of converting new fans. At least in this case, Square is also releasing the PSP version of the first game on the Playstation store.

Ha sido una sorpresa, lo he disfrutado muchísimo. Me recuerda a NieR Automata, aunque con mucho menos presupuesto. Disfrutable.

There's little fat to Valkyrie Elysium. It barely even has skin. In the place of a body is a bony, muscular action gauntlet, an exhausting marathon of violence acting as metaphor for the deeply entwined relationship of soul, body, and place and reflecting the protagonist's self-actualization as they come to understand this. Story creeps in slowly and lightly, hiding much of itself to incurious players in an effort to reflect the player character. They are born as the game starts, given fully and unquestioningly to their singular mission, that mission that defines nearly all games: save the world through force and violence.

Except that world is already gone. Largely thanks to budgetary constraints, Midgard is cold, ruined, and empty; a world like an overcast day, when rain is in constant threat of falling. It is populated not by people, but by spirits and memories that have become one with the land they occupy. Just as the fallen kingdoms around you defined these long gone people, so too do they define the ruins. And yet either way it goes, no matter what happens, the soul is never free, not really. It is constantly in servitude, perpetually a slave to individuals and moral constructions of societies and ideas of duty and honor.

Valkyrie Elysium does not give a terribly easy answer to this suggestion that we all exist in mutating webs of master and slave. The game is at once hopeful towards the power of connection and the profundity of giving yourself to others, and incredibly sad about the exact same thing. But then, maybe the answer was always there, in what the game exhaustingly asks of the player. Even if there is no way out, maybe sometimes you just have to try. Maybe sometimes you have to fight.

more thoughts here: https://baxtersmono.medium.com/valkyrie-elysium-a-spiders-web-of-control-63c7a1c9b2de

This is one of the most 7/10 games I have ever played, but it's also exactly the palette cleanser I needed right now.
The combat is great, bosses are fun, the music and voice acting are surprisingly good, and while the broad strokes of the story aren't the best, I enjoyed the einherjar a lot, and their growing connection to the Valkyrie and fun interactions saved it from being a complete write-off.
Unfortunately, everything else feels clearly hampered by budget. The level design is abysmal, the levels themselves are a bit overlong (and you have to replay them in their entirety if you miss some collectibles), enemy variety is rough, sidequests are monotonous, and as you get later into the game they give up and dump a million encounters on you steps apart from each other to pad things out further.
Despite all that, I enjoyed my time with it as a sort of junk food game, and I feel that it manages to be at least slightly more than the sum of its parts. I'm definitely interested to see what the extra Hilde content is like.

Also of note: demos tend to be quite good these days as they often give you a decent chunk of the start of the game that carries over data to the full version should you choose to buy it, but this game's demo is not good; it ends right before the combat really starts opening up. So if you were left a bit wanting by the start, it does get better.

this is literally a ps3 game and unlike other people who are weak i say that literally exclusively as a compliment. it also turns out that my time is kinda tight these days and im not really interested in putting however many hours into a game without a story i feel especially gripped by when there are other games i want to be playing, so it is with a heavy heart that im choosing to return it. maybe if it gets down to used ps3 game price someday i'll give it another go. shikatanai desu yo

Having gone through all the endings and hard mode, I can say that this game is really fun. Despite lacking enemies and very few interesting locations, I was never bored with the gameplay. But the story feels like a big after thought. Thankfully its not a long game - it just falls short of being an impressive one.

If you are aware that this is not a RPG, that this is very lightly related to the previous Valkyrie Profile games and that it is on all front pretty average, you will probably have a fun time on this 20-hour journey.

The main, and to some extent, only shining point of the game is the gameplay. This is a traditional Action combat game, made mostly by the staff of Onimusha and Ninja Gaiden games. For an action combat game, the combat is quite slow, which can be hard to adapt to as first, but makes for a much easier experience in terms of pulling combo, using magic and so on than a Devil May Cry for example.
The gameplay progression is really well paced with a flow of new weapons, mechanics and magics through the 20h that the game will take you. By the end of the game, the gameplay has evolved to a point that is truly satisfying and fun.

Unfortunately, it feels like the dev team was very aware that only the gameplay worth investing the little budget they had, as all the rest is terribly average. Level design, graphics and enemy diversity are nothing worth writing about.
The story, even considering again that this is not a RPG, is very slim, with the main story being pretty much all packed in the final mission. Which leads to the several endings, a feature still fun and interesting, and not frustrating this time around as it is very easy to unlock and see all of them.
I will also note that the Einherjar back story, while only told through audio drama, are really good and fun to discover. Two of them in particular were quite audacious for a Japanese developer with themes such as gender and discrimination well touched upon.
Finally, I'll note that the music is on the good side of Sakuraba's works. It is not as memorable as Valkyrie Profile work, but it is definitely a step up from his recent soundtracks. I appreciated the restrain in a lot of tracks.

It's definitely a game I recommend to fan of the genre if you are even remotely interested in Valkyrie universe. For the others, wait for a sale but if you give the demo a try and enjoy it, go for it, it's a fun game and it knows when to take its exit before gameplay becomes stale.

Initially this is a really plain looking action RPG without too much going for it. Once you start playing the game properly though it is really good fun: you get the Ultimate Technique from Ninja Gaiden and it's got an extremely satisfying parry, but the whole thing feels like a first draft of a full game. The levels are spartan and repetitive, the story is extremely bare-bones, the character upgrades and progression feel more gated behind story progress than anything, the whole thing's badly organised (you have six spell 'elements' but only four shortcut buttons, for example), and you can't cancel moves very well which can be frustrating when surrounded, especially since the camera is appalling.

But again, that combat, while it starts out as pretty limited, really picks up towards the end. The final bosses end up being really fun because unlike other games of its ilk, if you anticipate even the biggest moves you can just ignore them and do a cool counterattack while gems and health pickups fly out of the boss. I'd love to see another iteration of this because with more time and better scoping it could be really fun.

Steam Deck report: Not a very well optimised game. There were area where even an RTX 3080 couldn't hold 60fps in spite of some unimpressive visuals (albeit improved by HDR with some super saturated spell effects) so the APU in the Deck really struggles. I locked it to 30fps with Medium visuals and Balanced FSR, as the Low settings removed fundamental parts of the rendering which made it look really unacceptably bad (no shadows at all, removed realtime lighting, that kind of thing). Even then, it wasn't able to hold 30 in some areas even at max TDP: there was an ice corridor in the third chapter in particular which would end up sending the frame rate to the low 20s in spite of nothing happening. Ultimately playable but far from optimal.

I plan on revisiting this also. For whatever reason, the stages and presentation so far have not been to my liking, but I really want to finish it because I really liked Valkyrie Profile and Valkyrie Profile Silmeria.

Incomplete game, doesn't make justice to Valkyrie Profile saga

Really quite like the look of this game, the grey tinted fallen fantasy world is always a vibe for me, but apart from that I don't think this game has much to offer me. Combat is fine but unexciting, the story is fine but unexciting, the music is... fine but unexciting, it all moves at a decent pace and gives you new weapons and moves and stuff to work with but the core act of playing it is just not very satisfying and very tedious, so I couldn't find a reason to stick with it

Valkyrie Elysium has a certain charm to it. Like a game you'd get on the ps3 during a sale for 9.99 or something thrown on Games With Gold you'd randomly play over the weekend. Its a game that very much feels like it's a generation (or maybe even two) too late. In that sense it made me feel a little nostalgic for simpler times and has a bit of a cozy vibe. But the faux nostalgia isnt a half measure, this game comes with all the cons that have been ironed out in the years since those "simpler times" and it drags the game down a lot. This may very well be one of the most 3/5 games you'll ever play - but that isn't a bad thing.

Valkyrie Elysium's combat is the highlight. Its got lots of spells, elemental teammates you can summon and a decent if small amount of weapons with their own movesets at your disposal. It also has a grappling hook of sorts and lets be honest basically every game that adds one of those gets a free ticket to being awesome. In the rough sea of questionable design that makes up Valkyrie Elysium, its combat is a lovely little island in the center. But as the game goes on, its sands begin to erode.

It took me roughly 23 hours to beat Valkyrie Elysium. This is having done all 9 main quests as well as all 36 subquests. The combat keeps things together but quite frankly everything else is falling apart. The boss designs are dope but most of the normal enemies you'll encounter are the same few fellas with elemental reskins. The locations, while sometimes visually unique from eachother, still feel and play the same. There is nothing else to this game but the combat and slight exploration. There are a few so called puzzles but theyre really just summoning one of your party members to do something for you. That means the vast majority of this game you'll be fighting the same bundle of dull enemies through very familiar feeling levels over and over and over and over again. This does give this game a mindless nature to it, I was able to catch up on a lot of youtube. It was a good time to just turn my brain off and relax. But a great combat system can only take you so far. I believe even if you didnt go for every sub quest like I did - if you dont have something else on while you play this you'd probably get bored before the end.

There's also the story. Well, kinda. They try at some points. I think all of the characters are interesting but its all surface level, even during their quests they dont really get fleshed out very well. I got the true ending which was quite lengthy but honestly pretty satisfying. I never particularly cared for what was going on in this game but theres an interesting twist and idk, even if its forgettable and hardly existent at least it didnt have a shitty ending. There are actually four endings but seeing as you have to fight all the bosses for the true ending I didn't really feel the need to. Actually thats not entirely true. I did go back to attempt the others for trophies, but one of the bosses has four fucking phases and so when I died on the last one I decided nevermind and promptly deleted the game. That leads us to our next segment.

Playing on normal wasnt particularly hard. You are given a lot to work with its kinda hard to fail, but when the game wants to be challenging it does it in the unfun way. High HP enemies that do an annoying amount of damage. This wasnt too bad as it wasnt an often occurrence but thats just one of many small things that hold the game back even beyond its bland level and enemy design. It actually in fact has a pretty good and well spaced upgrade system but honestly thats the only other thing this does well. You gain proficiency with weapons the more you use them but I never noticed if it actually affected anything. Its a very slow grind to max proficiency too, when you've done everything the game has to offer but not everything fully upgraded is a pretty eye rolling experience. There is a hub area between levels but its entirely useless except for accepting a few quests, saving and starting said quests. Theres not even an item shop. If you want to get items you have to jump into a level and hope you find what you want in a chest. The problem is, you have to fully complete a level to keep any progress made. And if you wanna get some lost collectibles or find quests in the main levels, thats right. You have to replay them in their entirety. And most of the main missions are dragged out to at least an hour. I had to replay far more of the game than I would of liked simply because I missed a subquest at the very beginning of a level. This kind of design even seeps into its trophy lists. There are plenty of trophies that wont unlock until you beat the level. Even a few that if you get inbetween levels, you have to go enter one and beat that for it to unlock. And even better, the difficulty trophies dont stack. So if your first playthrough is on hard you're gonna have to play it again on normal. Whats better is there is no new game plus so you'll have to start from scratch is well. Theres so many little things like that in the game that really put into perspective the low budget and general unfinished feeling of the game.

In the end, Valkyrie is a mixed bag. Its perfectly average, in some ways a devolution but its saved by its really fun core combat. In nearly every way possible, Valkyrie Elysium is not a good game. But I'm okay with that. Sometimes you just need a mediocre experience to get you through the day. Keep your mind of things. Thats exactly what this was for me. I wouldnt recommend this for full price like I bought it, but if you see it on sale and need some downtime, I think this is a pretty perfect game for that.

Thanks for reading everyone <3

Trophy Completion - 77% (37/46)
Time Played: 23 hours roughly
Nancymeter - 62/100
Game Completion #135 of 2022
November Completion #1

I really wanted to like this more. The combat is fun but action segments and enemies get very repetitive, and levels feel needlessly elongated for the sake of adding length to the game. The narrative is forgettable. All in all it's not bad, it just wears out its welcome, and I'm happy to support it if it means we get another traditional Valkyrie game.

The gameplay is the icing on the cake of the game, but everything else is completely forgettable, the story, the characters, everything.
It's notable that Valkyrie Elysium lacked budget and development time, and it's a little sad since it's the return of a long dormant franchise, but on the other hand, it was fun and entertaining at least.

Valkyrie Elysium has one of the absolute finest combat systems i've seen in a game in a long time. A beautiful insection between the systems of Platinum and Kingdom Hearts, with bountiful options and ways to extend attack chains into this beautifully flowing thing. The sort of thing where you see a new group of enemies in the distance and think "let's go" even if it's the same bunch of mobs you've seen many times before.

It is such a bright, shining centerpiece for the game. Probably the best action game combat in a decade. All the game needs on top of it to be honestly a straight up game of the year is competent mission design, a decent story, and fair production values.

Well, shit.

Just about everything but the combat and visuals in Elysium is a notch below mediocre, and it threatens to ruin the whole damn thing. In so many ways it feels like it's a mid-budget game plucked straight from 2002, where action games like this were yet to work out things like quest design, level design, enemy variety, story structure, pacing, RPG elements...

I hate to say it but just going about the levels in Elysium is misery. The balance between linearity and open levels is as bad as it could possibly be, where it may as well have been liner with how corridor-y it is, but also offers just enough alcoves and off routes to both get lost and to hide trinkets down to waste your time. There's also bafflingly bad detective/tracking sections which require you to follow the slowest butterflies to a location, which you'll have to resummon, which yes has a 7 second unskippable animation, what the fuck? Oh, and you'll need to do some truly painful searching around the maps to find the mcguffins to achieve the true ending.

Well that is, if you care. The story isn't bad so much as barely anything happens, and your objectives for the first 80% of the game are unclear, and the game fails to really bring up consequences and honestly, what the core conflict even really is until really late on. Granted, you can kind of see it all coming anyway. There is some neat twists on norse mythology and stuff buried in here somewhere, and the true ending actually goes hard, but yeah. Not worthwhile.

Also for a war between gods which literally is about the fate of the world, the production is so barebones. There's no sense of scale at basically any point, the cast is tiny (there is legitimately one living human shown) - it's hard to articulate, but the drama it's going for just doesn't really pay off.

But fuck it, it's worth it. The combat is that good. The smorgasboard of dealbreakers just drift away when you're knee deep in some ridiculous aerial combo where you summon 2 dudes, ending with a spell that sets you up for another into a perfect parry launcher-thing.

It's just clear the budget was just not there for basically anything else.



I don't know if I've ever been more conflicted on a game. Part of me wants to shout from the rooftops that this game is a fantastic romp. Another part of me wants to throw my hands in the air and give this game the middle finger. Ultimately, I guess I land somewhere in the middle.

Let's get this right out of the way: This is a Valkyrie game in name only. Sure, it has themes from the series, and it ultimately is about your Einherjar and your time spent with them, but that's where the similarities end.

So, what is it? It's an action game, pure and simple. You pick a quest/sub-quest, load into a zone, fight some monsters, and move on. Luckily, for this game, the gameplay is good. It's really good. The elemental and Einherjar system is a nice twist. And once you unlock multiple weapons, spells, skills, and your Einjerhar allies, combat is a hectic yet slightly strategic good time. I was never bored with the mechanics. The enemy variety did let me down, but never was I rolling my eyes at an encounter. The bosses are a smidge easy, and I suck at games, but their designs and mechanics are pretty engaging.

It's everything else that drags the game down. The graphics? They're fine, but honestly it looks like a sharper, cleaned up PS3 game. The music is incredibly limited. It feels like there are 5-6 tracks. The RPG elements don't exist. The story is barebones. The characters are bland. The level layout, while not entirely linear, give you limited reasons to explore it. The voice acting is at times serviceable and other times awful. Oh, and FUCK the weapon proficiency grind. I would have 100%'d this game if you didn't have to spend HOURS grinding weapon proficiency.

I would be very interested in a sequel. I feel like the gameplay lies down a sold framework for the future. Let's hope the sales support it.

This is probably what a truly average game looks like : combat is very very fun, and drags along an incredibly barebones game. It's gotta be one of the only games I seriously don't think is worth 70 bucks as there is just so little here. If you're in the mood to mash and slash maybe give it a look when its on sale. Beat on HARD - was not HARD.

Much time in development was spent refining combat, but little on anything else


the game has a good skeleton but lacks substantial meat. feels like the devs had lots of good ideas that didnt get fleshed out. really interested to see where the valkyrie series goes from here

Valkyrie Elysium is a very solid action game. It feels about as good as an action game can without approaching Devil May Cry tier. It feels great to grapple onto an enemy from across the level, air combo them, slam them to the ground, break their stamina bar, do a big ground combo, and then hit them with a finisher. There's enough enemy, weapon, and ability variety that this really doesn't get old despite having a pretty long runtime for a game in this style. It also gets a massive buff for letting me use lances and maces in a character action game, which almost never happens.

Everything surrounding the combat is kinda just.... fine? The art style is a bit weird, although I think it works well when there's a lot of stuff going on in combat. The soundtrack is acceptable, although it's not one of Sakuraba's best. The level design is perfectly acceptable for a game that consists mostly of combat rooms, although there's only like 4 levels total. The story is really in the background, to the point where I feel like almost nothing happens until the last 1/3rd of the game, and at that point it's not very satisfying.

All that being said the combat is where this game really shines and it's a lot of fun! I also have no attachment to Valkyrie Profile so if there's anything egregious on that front it completely went over my head.


Demo Thoughts: Combat is very stiff, the art style is not pleasant to the eyes. Either pick hyper realism or hyper stylization they are not meshing well. Why does everything have a super bold outline? Also the game drops frames super hard on base PS4 I can feel this system getting phased out more and more with each new release.

Full Game: I'm gonna put this on hold until I acquire a PS5 this game is fucking abysmal on base ps4.

8/5/2023: I have finally gotten around to playing it and holy shit this game fucking sucks. Imagine any action game mechanic in any slightly decent to great game in the genre and this game has it. At best the mechanic will just function and at worse it's just handled worse than the game it took it from. The game has like no sense of feedback in anything going on and the stiffness of everything does not help.

I should feel like a flowing goddess of the battlefield but I feel more like a runaway freight train because you cannot cancel any animation at all which is literally action game 101 so you have to commit to long recovery frames of every action you ever take. This feels like a mid-2000's action game from the ps2 era displaced by time.

This is also the ONLY game I've seen somehow fuck up the concept of the enemy flashing red and attacking you with a strong unblockable attack. The flash gets lost in the cacophony of the battles due to how the game will just become unintelligible non-sense between you, your Einherjar, and your enemies doing shit that when these attacks hit you it never feels like you fucked up. Probably because in literally every game i've played that has this in it (which is most fucking action games by the way) it's also accompanied by a loud ass distinctive sound cue to give you an even bigger warning but this game DOES NOT HAVE THAT. Accompanied with the fact this game commits the cardinal sin of enemies being able to attack you from off screen, this is maddeningly annoying combination to deal with. Enemies will just have no tells half the time because the animation work is so poor on everything going on. Either enemies will have a weirdly animated wind up attack that will suddenly get unrealistically fast, fucking up your defense, or so fast you have no time to react and they just get to combo you (this is what the wolves do all the time). Also ain't it grand that enemies get to combo you for free but if you try to attack them they can just spam a backstep/sidestep that is 100% invulnerable until they feel safe from you and just get to drop out of your combos and hit you because you can't cancel any of your animations? It's like fighting the shittier Tales of Vesperia bosses but it's literally EVERY enemy.

"Oh but Tuck why don't you have the arts bar to stun them like the game wants you to?"

BECAUSE I SPENT IT ON EVERY OTHER ENEMY SO NOW I HAVE TO SPAM MY SUMMONS TO GET IT BACK FAST WHICH ADDS TO THE CACOPHONY.

HOLY FUCK.

Another thing that pisses me off is that this game somehow also fucks up execution attacks, which is another thing that even the most shallow of spectacle action games get right. The game is super fucking finnicky about what criteria you need to execute it.

Is the enemy like a fucking centimeter off the ground? Can't do it.
Slightly higher on a hill even though you're right next to it? Eh try it maybe it'll work. Coin toss, really.
Standing perfectly still (which is the most consistent way to pull it off without the game having a stroke) eh maybe coin toss that one too.

Not a single soul working on this game knew what the fuck they were doing when making it.

This game is impressively bad.

اللهم
يا غالب الحاجات!
يا من تتم الطلبات بواسطته!
يا من لا تُشترى فضله بالأسعار!
يا من لا يفسد عطاياه بفرض الواجبات!
يا من لا حاجة معه ولا شيء بدونه!
يا من تتجه نحوه الرغبة ولا تنحرف أبدًا!
يا من لا تنفد المطالب خزائن خزائنه!
يا من لا تتغير حكمته بأي شكل من الأشكال!
يا من لا تنقطع عنه حاجة المحتاجين!
يا من لا تضايقه الدعاء!
لقد أثنت على نفسك لعدم احتياجك لمخلوقاتك ، ويناسبك ألا تحتاج إليها ،
وقد نسبت إليهم الفقر ، فصالحهم أن يكونوا فقراء إليك.

لذلك فإن من يسعى جاهداً لإصلاح نقصه من خلال ما هو معك ويرغب في إبعاد الفقر عن نفسه من خلالك ، فقد سعى إلى حاجته في المكان الأكثر احتمالية والتقدم بطلبه من الجهة اليمنى.

ولكن من استدار في حاجته إلى أحد مخلوقاتك أو عيّن سبب منحها لغيرك ، فقد عرّض نفسه للحرمان واستحق أن يفوتك فضلك.

اللهم
إني محتاج إليك:
لم يفلح مجهودي وقطعت حيلتي قبل أن أصل إليه.
دفعتني روحي إلى تقديمها لمن يقدم لك احتياجاته ولا يمكنه أن يفعل شيئًا بدونك في طلباته ، لكن هذه إحدى زلات الجناة ، وهي واحدة من عثرات المذنبين!

ثم من خلال تذكيرك لي ،
لقد استيقظت من إهمالي ، من خلال نجاحك ، وقفت من زلتي ، ومن خلال توجيهك للطريق ، عدت وانسحب من تعثري.

قلت:
سبحان ربي!
كيف يسأل المحتاج من المحتاج؟
كيف يمكن للمعوز أن يلتمس المعوز؟

لذلك ذهبت مباشرة إليك ، يا إلهي ، متوسلاً ، وأرسلت إليك أملي بثقة فيك.

علمت أن
الكثيرين الذين أطلبهم منك قليلون قبل ثروتك ،
والثقل الذي أطلبه منك حقير قبل وفرتك ؛
كرمك لا يحده طلب أحد ،
يدك أعلى في منح الهدايا من كل يد!

اللهم
صل على محمد وعلى آله ،
خذني من كرمك إلى فضلك
المجاني
ولا تأخذني من عدلك
إلى ما أستحقه!
أنا لست أول من يطلب منك
وأنت منحته
بينما كان يستحق حجبه ،
ولست أول من طلب منك
وأنت كنت فضلًا تجاهه
بينما كان يستحق الحرمان.

اللهم
صل على محمد وعلى آله ،
استجب لدعائي ، اقترب
مني ،
ارحم دعائي ،
استمع لصوتي ،

لا تقصر أملي عليك ،
لا تقطع خيطي إليك ،
لا أدر وجهي في هذا حاجتي ،
واحتياجات أخرى ،
بعيدًا عنك ،

احضر من أجلي لتلبية
طلبي ،
ومنح حاجتي ،
وتحقيق ما طلبته
قبل أن أغادر هذا المكان
من خلال خاصتك ، مما يسهل لي الأمر الصعب والمتميز بالنسبة لي في جميع الأمور!

بارك الله على محمد وعلى آله وسلم بنعمة دائمة ومتزايدة ، لا تقطع
أبديتها ولا حدود لمصطلحها ، واجعل ذلك عونًا لي وسببًا لطلب طلبي!
أنت كريمة بلا حدود!

ومن احتياجاتي يا ربي كذا وكذا.

(هنا يجب أن تذكر حاجتك ، ثم تسجد ، وتقول في سجودك ...)

لقد عزاني فضلك
وخير خيرك الطريق ،
فأسألك بواسطتك
وبواسطة محمد وأهل بيته.
(بركاتك عليهم)
أن لا تعيدني بخيبة أمل!