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This is a surprisingly good port of Street Fighter IV to the 3DS, however there is also surprisingly little to talk about here. It is essentially just Street Fighter IV but on the 3DS. The main issue people tend to have with this game is the fact that your only controller happens to be a Nintendo 3DS, but after playing the mobile version of this game I'm grateful to even have a joystick at all, and it honestly doesn't feel that bad. My inputs were pretty consistent and even most combos were pretty easy to pull off. The only thing that I found slightly annoying was inputting super/ultra moves, but the ability to do special moves by tapping the touch screen completely fixes that, even if it is a little busted on characters like Gief. There is also new headache inducing 3D mode that I would never recommend playing, but otherwise this is a pretty solid port.

Unbelievable how disappointing this was, I will hand it to them though some of the level designs were pretty unique and actually stuck, but with how bad the WAD is as a whole can’t save this putrid filth. Every level just feels boring and is such a slog to go through. Constantly wandering around trying to go through these labyrinths can easily kill the most insatiable itch of wanting to play some Doom. Don’t waste your time with this unless you wanna give it a go yourself, trust me it won’t be a pleasant experience!

After the onslaught of the the Final Doom beatdown I decided to throw this one into the mix because I have heard this one wasn’t too great and wanted to make the unholy trifecta of Doom experiences.

Probably was the best one I played not that it had much competition the past few days lol. Its real short and basically just doing Doom 3 things with killing the classic demons and picking up and scanning PDA’s with a little bit of story thrown into the mix. The double barrel shotgun was my favorite thing throughout this next to Hell of course and I am glad you got to be there for a good little bit of time this go round. Gave me shitty flashbacks of my Diablo 4 run but I digress…

For something that was made by the team way later when the BFG edition came out it seems like there really was no passion in it. Just mindless basic Doom 3 stuff. Wish they would of done more with it, but all around it was pretty okayish.

Finally got around to playing another Puppet Combo game. Alot of the times I end up watching a playthrough of some of them on Youtube, regardless I love these games and how they make them it gives off such a unique and creepy retro vibe to them. I saw this on the new releases for PS5 and wanted to check it out.

The first beginning sequence ended up scaring the piss out of me which was my own fault because I should of known better coming from them lmao. Afterwards when I made it to the later half of the game it started to get pretty intense and a whole switch in the gameplay formula. This one felt like something that came out quite long ago compared to the quality of the game and how things played out, still it was a cool one with its lore spread throughout with the files you read. A super easy platinum to acquire as well!

Definitely hold Nun Massacre at a higher regard to this one, but it was neat and I like how they vary from first to 3rd person with their games. These games make me so uneasy and I am getting addicted to them. Wanna play more like this and checkout other ones similar studios have done.

if this doesnt get announced at the direct tomorrow im gonna be struck with a meteorite and disintegrate🗿

edit: https://youtu.be/LlF8APEkh-E?si=OyGsm3zrtkBsqaGx&t=60

This review contains spoilers

If your perception of Forspoken is entirely predicated on pre-release trailers, you might be forgiven for thinking the game's greatest sin is its Whedony dialog. Lines like "I just moved shit with my mind!" clung to this game like a grease stain prior to launch, and Forspoken's subsequent underperformance wasn't the least bit surprising. If you're anything like me, you probably thought the derision was a little overblown and that the clunky dialog might be made up for by a satisfying gameplay loop. After an interminably long opening and upon being released into the open world of Athia, it is... at least for about three hours.

The playful banter between Frey and her magical talking vambrace named "Cuff" dries up after Frey realizes her wacky isekai adventure is actually worse than being a homeless three-strikes recipient in New York. She then dedicates the majority of the game to finding a way home, often at the expense of others, becoming so single-minded and selfish that she frequently jumps down the throats of Cipal's downtrodden yet kindly inhabitants, paying back their generosity with contempt.

Granted, the game makes a point of Frey's troubled background, her difficulty connecting with others, and adds a bit of tragedy on top of that when an orphan dies as collateral during an early battle in Cipal's lower city. The problem is Forspoken expects you to relate to and sympathize with her, and when she throws her walls up and becomes spiteful to those who are in no way responsible for her trauma, it just starts to become draining. Twelve hours in and she's still telling people who are trying to help her that she doesn't care what happens to their home or whether they live or die. That's your protagonist and your window into Athia. I'd rather her be a massive dork with bad one-liners, that's actually more endearing than lying to children and being a dick to cats.

This all came to a head for me during a particularly nasty scene where Frey engages in some one-upmanship after another character's father dies. Her entire personality at this point devolves to "my trauma power level is higher than yours," and it's suffocating. A good story can track the regression of a character's mental state, but Forspoken is completely lacking in the necessary nuance, instead wallowing in Frey's misery and confining her actual growth to the final two chapters of the game. This is especially funny as it's communicated during a series of flashbacks depicting Athia's downfall, and during this whole sequence Frey is going "oh my god, these poor people, they're all being slaughtered" like oh ok now you care I guess, or maybe the problem here is she can't tell them to eat shit because they're ghosts, I don't know!

The plot is also extremely predictable. I understand that sometimes the audience needs to know more than the protagonist so that the story can move forward, but when it gets to the point that you're twenty steps ahead at all times, it feels like the main character is just a moron. Frey keeps falling for the Son of Sam routine, constantly being goaded into killing Tantas - high witches who govern Athia - despite her protests.

"Hey, we're near the Tanta's castle. Perhaps you should confront her, knock another off the list. Think of it as self-preservation, they are trying to kill you, after all..."

"No. No, I'm NOT killing anyone else; I'm taking this sap and I'm curing Break Bob and going home."

"Ok. What if you tried to reason with Tanta instead?"

"Ohhhhyeah..."

Anyway, you kill her!

One of the story's final twists is that your cuff is a corruptive and manipulative entity, but at no point do the interactions between Frey and Cuff actually convey that some sort of corrosive force is overtaking her or leading her off the path through anything more than very mild suggestion. In fact, it really just seems like Frey is following her own personal trajectory and is independently foolish and miserable.

Though Gary Whitta helped Square develop the "germ of an idea" that became Forspoken, his contribution to the final product seems to begin and end with the foundational lore of Athia. In an interview with Video Game Writing 101, he explains that at some point during development the story was jettisoned completely and reworked as an isekai, but due to scheduling conflicts, Whitta was unavailable and unable to work on the story further. Beyond that, I can't imagine what happened that led to the story taking the shape it did, but the lack of nuance, humanity, and general thinness of the narrative hurt the game in some incredible ways.

Unfortunately, the story isn't the only thing that's "thin." Cipal, which acts as the main hub and respite for the player, feels empty. Sparsely populated by your typical stilted video game NPCs going about their rigidly programmed routines. This is where I need to shoulder some of the blame here, because admittedly, I didn't really bother with side quests after taking on two in the early game which reminded me of your typical quest in Final Fantasy XVI. I made the decision to not do that crap again. I took some pictures, and I fed some sheep, and at the end of the sheep feeding quest Frey told the nice young man who was showing me around to go fuck himself, so... you know. I'm good.

The open world is divided into different regions, as is commonly the case in these kinds of games, but there's little to distinguish them outside of minor topographical changes (one area has more water, one has more rocks) and whatever color they decided to over-saturate them with. They're littered with points of interest, but it's all the standard fare... Here's a watch tower, here's a combat challenge, here's a locked puzzle chest... The labyrinths and cat collecting were the only things I went out of the way for, because I think labyrinths and cats are cool, and because the former is the most efficient means to level up and get good gear. Everything else "is what it is," and Forspoken largely fails to incentivize you with fun or meaningful tasks.

Actual navigation feels good at first. The "magic parkour" system has you flinging yourself off trees and doing crazy stunts as you glide around the world, but it also struggles with small objects like curbs and tiny rocks. Frey frequently snags on small yet abrupt inclines which disturbs the flow of movement, and I frequently got stuck in seams and surfaces that while appearing at a scalable height were in fact not designated as a navigable piece of geometry. The game will thankfully dislodge you, but my appreciation for what Forspoken was doing with movement weakened the more I played. It just doesn't feel like it's "there" just yet, but the idea is good.

Combat functions a lot better, with the parkour movement and spellcasting giving it a sort of dance-like quality. However, despite getting some good mileage and a handful of terrific boss encounters out of this, combat doesn't feel like it truly opens up until right near the end of the game. It takes you nearly 40% of the story before you get the second elemental skill tree, with water and electricity elements unlocking so late that you're practically railroaded into the end game with little opportunity to experiment. The game knows this too as it starts dumping a ton of mana (your skill currency) on you leading up to the final boss so you can actually buy things before the game wraps up.

Every part of Forspoken is lacking in the care and attention it needed. This is a game where your Cuff verbalizes context clues to guide the player, yet the game frequently pauses to tutoralize you through pop-ups all the way to the last chapter. Where every moment of investigation, every conversation with an NPC, every disengagement from a scripted event comes with several seconds of stillness as the game considers restoring control. Small things that just don't feel good but add up to pure annoyance are then compounded by the bigger problems, like the insufferable character writing, the emptiness of the world, or the bizarre pacing of systems. There is not one grain unmarred, and whether those imperfections are a laundry list of catastrophic problems or confined to a single asterisk depends on what you're looking at.

Forspoken would be such a better game if it's biggest problem was Frey saying "I just moved shit with my mind! Yeah, I guess I do that now...!"

Sit down. Strap in. Here's how it works: when you die, you fall into the sea of the afterlife, where your soul is swallowed by a puffer fish that is captured by the Swim Team. They extract your soul from the puffer fish on the impossibly large ship Babel and then send you down for memory extraction before shuttling you off to a carnival that ends with your soul being fired via cannon into your next life.

That's the opening chapter of A Guidebook of Babel, and everything you need to know about the game. It's the bizarro worldbuilding and creativity, the looping story, that will keep you playing. Multiple characters, mild time-editing puzzle-solving, tragic backstories all tug the player along, always offering new twists and tidbits, always leaving the player wanting to know a bit more. It's a clever little game, inventive and sincere, with its only real flaw being its fear that the player won't be able to solve its riddles. There's a fair amount of hand-holding, optional as it is, and the sense that this could have been a more complicated, note-requiring game. But it's not, and that's fine. Still fun, still clever and refreshing, still worth your time.

This one's just a silly little guy, I like him.

I feel like I'm being too harsh when rating these games. I am actually enjoying them, I mean that. I'm a sucker for horror media, combine that with probably my favorite series ever, it tickles my brain a bit. Like I said, I love the community that goes behind these critters, and with games like these, you get to see some really cool pixel art renditions of the characters, as well as some fun gimmicks like the fake error screens and the little infighting between whoever's in my notepad and Mr. X himself (Lord X, sorry, different guy). It's cool! It's all cool! I will never pretend it isn't!

That doesn't change the fact that all of these games are, like, 10 minutes long and pretty much all play the same, though. Looking forward to what's to come. Hopefully...

This review contains spoilers

I'll be honest, even as a furry dyke this doesn't tantalize me much at all. The sex scene is a singular disembodied white penis entering a vagina! Where's the splendor? Where's the daring?! Our ancestors in macrofetishists and pawfuckers did not die in all our wars just for wholly human anatomy to reign supreme! For shame!

In all seriousness it's a fine trivia with a boring sex scene for 100% accuracy. Nothing worth the memery it got, kinda wish Newgrounds-core porn games (or games with pornographic elements in general) weren't inherently memed this hard or treated with this level of unseriousness. That's how we end up with the situation on Steam where it's flooded with horrible VNs and no exploration of adult themes within serious contexts.

Rise of the Ronin is Team Ninja's first open world title and while it turns out to be a very fun game, you can REALLY tell it's their first.

Being set in Japan's Bakumatsu period, Ronin puts you at the center of many conflicts, wars, and political turmoil that defined the era. The game attempts to take full advantage of its setting through the introduction of a large cast of historical figures and a system that allows you to form bonds with quite a few of them. I was fond of Ronin's Bond system particularly due to the character-specific bond missions which provide more characterization to important characters and in some cases lead to their own little storylines. The rate at which new characters are introduced does make it a little hard to remember a lot of the cast and their role within the story (the in-game encyclopedia is a lifesaver). Even then, this is still probably one of the most comprehensible narratives Team Ninja has ever told.

Ronin's biggest strong point is without a doubt its gameplay. There are a lot of weapon types to choose from each comprised of their own styles, stances, and skills that allow you a great deal of variety when it comes to choosing your playstyle. The combat was fast and challenging enough to the point where I never really got bored by it. Pulling off consecutive parries until the enemy gets stunned long enough to pull off an execution just feels really satisfying. I had concerns regarding the enemy variety since 99.9% of them are humans, unlike in Team Ninja's previous game, Wo Long which had you fighting monsters on top of them. The enemy variety comes mainly from the styles they use, with more unorthodox weapons coming into play occasionally during boss fights. I didn't feel like my brain was actively turning into mush every time I fought the same group of enemies, unlike in Wo Long, so clearly it did something right.

Now, let's talk about the open world. It's split into three separate maps that are packed to the brim with icons indicating activities, collectibles, and missions. These activities include clearing bandit outposts, taking pictures, petting cats, glider training, etc. I completed almost everything on the first map, but when the second map arrived and filled the map with even more of these activities, I hit the "honk mimimi" and put most of my focus on completing the actual story missions. A lot of the open-world activities just felt mind-numbing and I didn't see much incentive in doing them. While the open world is capable of looking beautiful visually, its graphics still feel outdated and that becomes even more apparent the moment you enter one of the main cities. All of this comes together to make it the weakest part of the game, but like I said before, this is Team Ninja's first open world and I do hold the belief that they will do significantly better if they ever decide to tackle this format again.

Since this game is currently a PS5 exclusive, I do want to point out how surprisingly well it uses the dualsense. The haptic feedback allows you to feel everything from swords clashing to the steps your horse makes while you're riding it, which was especially useful as it made traversing the open world slightly less boring.

Overall, I really did enjoy Rise of the Ronin, but I just cannot recommend buying it for its asking price of $70. Catch this on a sale if you can.

Hands down the sweatiest, most Mountain Dew and Doritos FPS I’ve ever played. Ubisoft is out here trying to revive the “MLG era” vibes in an attempt to break into the Esports scene by taking all the genre’s worst modern trends and mixing them together. Essentially creating a more obnoxious Call of Duty complete with half-hearted hero shooter elements and a free-to-play format to allow for the whole range of corporate greed monetization schemes, from Fortnite-style battle passes to your typical overpriced microtransactions.

A lot of this could have been forgiven, or at least ignored, were it not for how soulless the whole thing feels. Sure, I don’t exactly like how the higher than average default aiming sensitivity (and therefore the gunplay as a whole) is clearly geared towards the twitch reaction, trickshot crowd, but there’s no entry fee and it won’t absolutely devour your hard drive space in the same manner as its obvious Activision-published inspirations will. That’s really all this has going for it though. Not only is there a limited number of both maps and modes currently, but the whole thing is utterly devoid of personality.

Look, maybe I’m just not familiar enough with Ubisoft’s various properties. However, this pulling out and combining of several fractions from across a handful of their IPs fails to deliver the shared universe thrills you would hope to receive and that they were unquestionably going for. Outside of one set in a carnival which ends up seeming wildly out of place, the battlegrounds don’t distinguish themselves from what you would find in any other military-themed competitive offering. Meanwhile, the roster of playable characters carries no big or recognizable names. Instead it’s a cast of originals created exclusively for this who would be lucky to serve as background scenery NPCs in the title’s they’re supposedly representing. A rather self-defeating move I might add. I can’t imagine players would care enough to buy new skins for these losers…

The actual gameplay doesn’t fare much better. I appreciate the emphasis on more goal oriented match types that push teamwork and cooperation as a group. Yet, if you’re in the same boat I was and lack buddies who don’t also totally hate this then you’re in for a rough time. My word is XDefiant attracting the absolute lousiest audience. The majority of randos I got stuck with tended to pursue kills over playing the objective, and whenever I did land in lobbies with people using mics it was honest-to-goodness literally always Hispanic dudes casually dropping and/or calling others the n-word. And I must say that’s left me super confused. So is it still racist when they do it, or can any minority group use that slur with impunity now? Asking for a friend.

Not to mention, it’s not long until you realize how unbalanced some of these classes’ abilities are. For example, there’s almost no reason to ever select a member of the “Cleaners,” since they’re slow drone attacks put you at legitimate disadvantage when facing foes with the skills to turn borderline invisible, reveal enemy locations to their entire squad through walls, or pop a riot shield to mitigate incoming damage. Another factor that contributes to this being an overall dreadful mess to the degree that even upon getting “gud” enough to achieve that coveted MVP rank at the end of a victory, I wasn’t having much fun.

It’s rare for a game to leave me in a far poorer mood after playing it in the way this did, and you can check my review history to see I’ve suffered through my fair share of trash in the pretty recent past. Although I realize we haven’t exited the “pre-season” early days and that this could change significantly as it grows, I’ll be walking away regardless. The sad fact is there’s nothing provided to pull me away from Black Ops: Cold War anyways, an older entry in its own respective franchise. Ultimately causing XDefiant to easily fall among what I consider to be my least enjoyable online multiplayer experiences to date.

4/10

I'm fully convinced this game only exists because someone wanted the Yoshi commits tax fraud meme to be a real game. And really despite being a "joke" game, there is a lot of heart put into it by the Dev.

It is a Zelda-lite, and the word "lite" is doing a lot of heavy lifting here since the game can take 1 hour to 100% and the dungeons/puzzles are really barebones that I'm more inclined to call this an adventure game due to the fact that the best part isn't the gameplay, but the dialogue. Of course with the game being based off a meme, you'd expect the Dev to deliver on the game being funny, and they do. It's silly humor that is chuckle worthy, but nothing too outlandish. I was keen to talk to each NPC in anticipation of reading something so funnily stupid.

The gameplay itself is really just a means to get to the next dialogue box as combat is barebones 2D Zelda sword attacks, and puzzles are the same bomb and portal puzzles repeated throughout the entire game.
If you do play this, make sure to go with the easy 100% as you will get a nice surprise with the final boss.

This was still a good time as a nice little joke title, but I wouldn't pay full price for this. Definitely play this on game pass or get it for at least half price on sale. It's hard to recommend this at full price.

(Part 8 of the Half Century Challenge, created by C_F. You can read their eighth review here)

We may know them now as the old, fragile corpse of a company that just refuses to die out while clinging to the past rigorously with all their might, but back in the earliest days of gaming, Atari was THE video game company that beat all the rest. They were the ones responsible for some of the most influential and classic video games ever released, such as Pong, Breakout, and so on, and with their lineup of console from the fondly remembered Atari 2600 to even the laughing stock known as the Atari Jaguar, they have had quite the history with all of the games that they try to put out on the market. Sure, they may have made some pretty big mistakes in the past, such as inadvertently helping cause the Video Game Crash of 1983, as well as the aforementioned Atari Jaguar, but without them and their influence on the industry, I can’t even imagine where video games would be nowadays. So, I figured it was about time that we PROPERLY reviewed an Atari game on here, rather than just give one a couple of sentences and a joke thrown in, and the game we are gonna do that with is Video Olympics.

Much like with most Atari 2600 games in general, or any other game for Atari consoles, I had never really heard anything about this game prior to this review. When it comes to my general knowledge of video games and video game history, it goes all the way back to the NES era, and SOME points in the arcade era before that, but aside from that, that’s it. Don’t really know too much about any of the games from Atari systems, or whatever other systems were released back then, so I am curious to see what kind of “hidden gems” I have been missing out on for so long from these systems. However, when I went to research for this game, I then quickly discovered that…….. It… it’s just Pong… it’s just Po- IT’S JUST PONG! Goddammit, we already did an entire review on Pong rip-offs, we can’t do another one on it! But I couldn’t find anything else worth reviewing in the selection from 1977 though! loud groan........... you know what, fuck it. I love running gags, and Pong is one of the best gags that I have ever seen, so we’re doing it again! HERE WE GO!

So, one neat thing that I actually really like about old Atari games about this is that, when it comes to a good selection of the games you could get for the 2600, you weren’t limited to just one game. A lot of the games for these systems actually contained multiple games on them that you could select from, with them either being variations on previous games, or new games entirely, which does provide a good amount of variety and replayability for games that look like… well, that. Video Olympics is no different when it comes to this, as we have a total of 50 games on here, each one mimicking a real life sport while being a variation of Pong itself, which is pretty neat, so, as you probably expected, we are going to go through all 50 of these games and see just what is so special about each and every one of them. And I’m doing it just for you.

To start things off, of course we have the classic game of Pong to work with, where you compete against another person, you bounce a ball back and forth between each other, you score a point on the other person, and you laugh in their face as they are now a disgrace to their family name. We all know how it works, and it still works just as well here, and there are even some new variations introduced here to change up the gameplay slightly. You can now set your paddles to several different settings to change up the game, such as the Speed option, which will make it so that the ball flies towards the other side faster whenever you hit it with your paddle, or the Whammy option, which will launch the ball from your paddles at sharper angles, making so that you can score against your opponent easier. While these don’t change too much about the game, they do add an extra layer of precision and quick thinking for the experience, which I am a fan of, and Games #1 and 2 consist of Pong with these different settings, so that way you can find out which variation works best for you.

If you just so happen to be a friendless loser though who can’t get anyone to play Pong with you, then fear not, for Games #3 and 4 of this pack consist of Robot Pong, a version of Pong that is pretty much the exact same as the original version, once again with the different Speed and Whammy settings, except now instead of facing another real-life opponent, you will face a computer opponent instead. Kinda seems like a waste to separate the single-player and multiplayer options into four separate games, but it is Atari, so it makes perfect sense as to why they did that, and it does at least give more options for those who, again, don’t have anyone to play the game with, so that is cool.

After that though is when things get real spicy, as for Games #5 and 6, we have the Pong 4-player game, where you will be taking on a Doubles game of Pong, with two players on a team, and each player controlling a single paddle each. This doesn’t change too much about the game, but it is at least cool to have the option to play with multiple people, and they change up the position of the paddles themselves for Games #7 and 8, so that is pretty cool if you don’t want your paddles to be constantly overlapping each other. Not only that, but it does also add another layer of strategy that can change up a match pretty quickly…… or at least, as quickly as a Pong match can be changed up anyway.

If controlling just one paddle isn’t enough for you though, then not to worry, because for Games #9 and 10, we have Super Pong, where you can control two different paddles at once! I know, I know, your heart is just beating out of your chest thinking about that, and just how CHAOTIC matches can get because of it, cause I’m thinking that myself as well. If you thought that sounded scary though, then just wait until you get to Games #11 and 12, where it is Super Pong again, but now it’s back in 4-player mode, which means there are a total of 16 PADDLES on screen at once…….. SIXTEEN! Whatever madman at Atari thought of putting this many paddles into a game at once must be some kind of lunatic, but I appreciate them for going the extra mile regardless.

But anyway, we should now go ahead and get away from the BORING, regular versions of Pong here, and get into the more exciting stuff now! Games #13 and 14 brings us into the wild and wonderful world of Soccer, which in this game is almost just like Pong, except now the field you play in is green, because how can it not be, and you control two different paddles, one in front of your goal, and the other one further out to combat the other player. If that doesn’t sound like your cup of tea though, then there is a way around that set-up, because with Games #15 and 16, we get back the 4-player options from before, with one player controlling each paddle, and there being two different players on each team. This one feels a lot more natural to mess around with, rather then trying to figure out what you are doing with two different paddles at once, but for those of you who are wanting that extra bit of chaos for 4-player mode, then Atari has got you covered with Games #17 and 18, where they put the extra paddles back in, to the fear of Pong players everywhere.

But that’s not all that the Soccer variants offer, oh no sir, because these are also the first games in this set-up that introduce the Catch variant into the mix. This makes it so that you are able to catch the ball with one of your paddles, allowing you to aim it and shoot it wherever you would like to change the game up, allowing you to strategize even more with how you shoot the ball around and what kind of plays you could throw out towards your opponent. Not gonna lie, I think this may just be my favorite variation on the game that we have here, because it feels a lot less uncontrollable compared to every other mode, and again, it allows you to be a lot more precise with your shots and plays, which I heavily prefer over just blindly hitting the ball with my paddle wherever it goes, just to see what plays out in the future.

Now that we got Soccer out of the way though, I think it’s about time that we move from a sport that I barely know how to play to a sport that I have NO CLUE how to play at all, as with Games #19 and 20, we now have Foozpong!........... you know, Foozpong? It’s like Foozball, except with Pong paddles………. no? Well, anyways, this one makes it so that you will be controlling two separate rows of Pong paddles, seemingly never ending, being able to hit the ball back to your opponent at many given opportunities with how many different paddles will be on all ends of the screen. “But wait, Mega”, I hear you cry, “I want my Pong game to be a cluttered, incomprehensible mess that anyone can barely play!” Well, little Jimmy, do I have the surprise for you, because Games #21 and 22 give you just that by bringing back the 4-player mode, so that everyone can be overstimulated and confused at the same time.

Now let’s move onto the games that take a much more simple approach to the Pong formula, as for all of my peeps up in the Maple Leaf country, Games #23 and 24 give us Hockey, which is pretty similar to that of regular Pong, except rather than trying to get the ball to reach the other side of the screen where your opponent is, we now actually have goals that you have to hit the ball into instead. That is pretty neat, adding yet another thin line of strategy to the ever-evolving game that is Pong, and with Games #25, 26, 27 and 28, you can upgrade it to not only give yourself 2 paddles to work with, but THREE paddles as well!.......... not exactly sure why you would need those, considering how small the goals are this time around, but hey, it’s still there anyway. And before you ask, no, they didn’t forget about any of the friend groups that go beyond two people, because Games #29 and 30 give you the 4-player option that crave with every fiber of your being, and they even manage to give you the Foozpong set-up with Games #31 and 32 as well, just in case you really didn’t want to play the game today.

All of that stuff we just talked about though, including all of the other games included beforehand….. BABY SHIT. That’s what they all are, as we haven’t gotten to the KING of kings, the master of all Pong games yet, as with Games #33 and 34, we get the man, the myth, the LEGEND, Quadrapong! If you somehow don’t know the majesty that is Quadrapong, then let me tell you all about it: it is actual, no strings attached, 4-player Pong, where each of you takes one side of the screen, and you have to hit the ball into your opponent’s goal. It isn’t too much more complex than any of the other games of Pong that we have covered so far, but I’m just happy to get a proper free-for-all Pong mode here, rather than whatever co-operative bullshit they pull with all of the other games.

But, if you want any something more inventive then that, then we got you covered, as with Games #35 and 36, we get our next game, Handball, where instead of trying to score goals against your opponent, you are now trying to get more points then them by hitting the ball yourself, with both of you on one side of the screen. I like this approach as well, changing up the objective of the game rather than how the player reaches the objective of each game, which is pretty cool……. but then they ruin it with Games #37 and 38, where they place two other players slightly in front of you, so thanks for that, guys. You all were doing so great too, I had so much faith in you, and you threw it all away…

Not to worry though, because they can help gain back their good faith with the introduction of Games #39 and 40, Volleyball! This one works pretty differently from all of the other games, where the ball will actually bounce around vertically, and you have to bounce it over to the other opponent’s side, which is a nice change of pace rather than sticking to the traditional Pong formula for every single game, but just changed up very slightly. And of course, they give you the 4-player variant with Games #41 and 42, with those other two players getting smaller paddles that are slightly over the two main paddles, which is a nice little addition, even if they can’t help a ton when compared to the main paddles.

If you have been getting tired of all this Ponging, then you will be happy to know that we are on the home stretch, where we now have the last Pong game here, with Games #43, 44, 45, and 46 giving us Basketball! Much like with Volleyball, you have to bounce the ball around rather then hitting it towards an opponent, but naturally, you have to get the ball into the hoops this time around….. and by hoops, I mean the rectangles that they pretend are hoops in this game. And to end things off, Games #47, 48, 49 and 50 give us the 4-player variants, where you get two more smaller paddles above the main ones, which can also help out in scoring all of the baskets, so that everybody in the family of all ages can come together and have a blast with the ONLY proper way to ever play basketball ever.

And with that, we are DONE! We have gone through every single game variation that can be found in Video Olympics, and I am NEVER doing this again! Seriously, there is only so much that one man can say about Pong before he ends up wanting to pong himself to death, and I think I am just right about there. But what I will say is, out of all of the Pong variations that I have played and researched to talk about on this website, this might just be the best one of the bunch. Yeah, it doesn’t have too many differences compared to all of those other versions of the game that exist out there, but the fact that this single package offers so many different versions of the game to play, coupled with the fact that it introduces more variations on the game, is quite admirable, and it makes it really fun to go through. Obviously, you probably won’t get much out of it, considering that it is just more Pong, but for a brief amount of time, you could definitely have some fun with it with friends, before you all inevitably move on to playing actual video games after this. But with all that out of the way, we are done here. I don’t even have an ending joke, I am going to go fly onto my bed now. Happy Ponging Season to you all, and I will see you all in 3,000 years.

Game #619

What in the skibidi ad riddled fresh hell is this!! Short kings don't listen to this don't pay attention hnnng my short kings do not even conceive Tall Man Run do not give it the time of day. I'm of average height, and I played this, and I am elligible to review the product. Gentlemen, at what cost? It was free but I will never financially recover, if you know what I mean. Average day in Elon's neuralink shitass future if you will. Designing games like this shouldn't be allowed. My balls itch when I see my chonky guy go from hero to zero in the span of one (1) corridor. I can be your angle... or your worst nightmare... Fuck it. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. I need to believe it. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

1 star review on the app store brigade... Assemble! Let's gooooo! Say no more. I already know what my opps are thinking "nooo this game is great you just didn't understand the themes graaah it's bigger than yourself" and I laugh as the trap I laid successfully ensnared my beloathed. Ahahah! How ironic. After the videogame crash of the 80s, the Nintendo Seal of Quality was one of the reasons gaming was brought back from the brink of death, to counter pure garbage products being passed around like a blunt. Now in the 2020s, expecting a crash any second now, and that seal would work wonders when evaluating those mobile games. Tall Man Run is not the worst offender, but it got me thinking about it, so good job Tall Man Run. Ten cryptocurrencies for Slytherins!

Hell naaah he shidded upgrades and currency adn fat how does he do this. Strictly speaking, he should not be doing that. How is the family gonna be fed if you're telling them to reject the food? This is what happens when you're the last person to go eepy at thz sleepover. And what the hell is that hub? A reject from Clash of Clans? Huh it is. Look up " Tall Man CoC" for more info. It be crazy the shit you do in that hub though. You stand in front of a building and the job gets done. You don't have a degree in any way form or shape. Very sus. It's not about a shitty pun like "stand tall" or something because the building sucks your height out of your soul. That's... 😳 okk u rizzed me up splendiferously. Now eat that guy. Yup that guy right there. Eat him up. Trust me it's for the good of Gotham City

New paragraph new bullshit. Believe my wholeheartedly I just do it cuz I'm forcing myself to have a format I don't have the strength to yap for a 5th paragraph I'm already struggling to milk the game's contents as is. But the Lord knows I won't finish the dam review without mentioning how it controls. There's no way bruh he dont go where I want. We takin Uber Eats I cant go eat this shit on my own 💯 that shit might have gone hard on Windows XP but comeon what am I doin in my life 😭 that post nut clarity ahh somethin else the tightest course on God's green earth is not what I was built for. It was to goon. My remains will be the final artistic touch in the pavement(tm) Made in Ohio

It took me many years, but I finished all of the games present in this collection.
I got the Castlevania Anniversary Collection back in 2019, and it was something great for the Castlevania series, I'd say. This franchise rarely got collections, and only a few re-releases here and there thanks to Nintendo's Virtual Console service.

Now, with this collections, we would be able to experience many Classic Castlevania games, all at a good price. It is a bit odd seeing games like Rondo of Blood and Castlevania Legends being excluded, but what we got is pretty good.
We got the original NES trilogy, the SNES and Mega Drive games, the first two Game Boy games and even the NES version of Kid Dracula as a bonus.
And in a update, they included most of the Japanese versions of these games, which is great, because it actually allowed me to beat Castlevania III.

The extra Bonus Book they added is also a nice addition, filled with high-qulaity prints of box art, and some interviews too.

Overall, the Castlevania Anniversary Collection is a great collection for those who want to get into the Castlevania series, and want to see where the series started.