255 Reviews liked by lastkeymusic


errrmmmm... LAME!! clean-up on aisle... LOSERVILLE!

homestuck but gayer. devil may cry for disney channel kids. an unmistakable part of arab culture. kingdom hearts 2 is all these things and more. may god only comprehend it.

GRAPHICS: Pretty charming and a nice style, though the character models can be a bit awkward/plastic-y in appearance and stilted in movement. Everything has a sort of sepia-toned air to it, which fits with the atmosphere of the game.
CHARACTERS: They're all pretty stereotypical. Side characters are one-note, but the main characters were likeable enough to me, though I know a couple of them are a little divisive among players (read: Chloe). My personal favourites were Kate and Nathan; I think they're interesting depictions of two very different responses to mental illness and trauma, one who directs their hatred inward towards themselves and one who directs it outward towards others.
DIALOGUE/WRITING: I generally hate to use the term "cringe-worthy", but the writing in this game is so bad it's sometimes painful. "Ready for the moshpit, shaka brah" and "Go fuck your-selfie" are two immediate examples that come to mind. It's very clearly a script written by grown men trying to emulate how they think teenage girls talk and falling very, very short. It's bearable if you don't take it too seriously.
GAMEPLAY: Pretty Telltale-esque. Walk around, point at and click on objects, some very light puzzles. Dialogue options as per usual, though with the pretty neat twist that you can go through a conversation, rewind time, and use information you gained from that future to unlock new dialogue choices.
MULTIPLAYER: None.

It's a fine game, though definitely overrated IMO. Telltale does everything it does better and with an interface I like better, and the ending pretty much disregards all of your choices even moreso than Telltale games are often criticised for doing. However, it fills a niche, it has a lovely atmosphere and a gorgeous and fitting soundtrack, and the characters fit the setting well. Again, if you don't take things too seriously, this is good for what it is -- and, if you're a teenager, particularly a teenage girl, I think you'll find a lot to like and relate to in parts of it.

Favourite Male Character: Nathan
Favourite Female Character: Kate
First Character I Liked: Kate
Favourite Character Design: Jefferson
Favourite OST: Got Well Soon, Obstacles, Mountains, Spanish Sahara
Favourite Scene: The ending of Episode 1, with everyone watching the snow fall and the first indication something was up with the weather
Least Favourite Character: Jefferson

Fascinating concept, gorgeous visuals and atmosphere, mind-blowing twists. The combat is a little clunky sometimes, but no more than a lot of other FPS games I've played, especially older ones. I do maintain that the game would have been much stronger had it ended with the Atlas twist and Ryan confrontation - it built up and up to this well sketched-out, shocking climax, and then it just... kept going afterwards when the moment was ripe for rolling credits and leaving you with those emotions. It just kind of makes things peter out and lose that high.

The game also loses a lot of its shine once you realise it was less intentionally intelligent and political and more an accidental stumble into profoundity by a guy who had no clue what he was implying.

That said, I thought the good ending was appropriately emotional and sweet. I feel no particular incentive to continue with the other Bioshock games, though I'm sure I'll get to them someday, but I enjoyed this and the lore surrounding it.

after i lost my virginity at 15 this game lost its appeal and now i eat cock and there are only shitty fucking weeaboo bait fem twinks and anime girls with big badonkers so i play dota 2 instead bc im gay and it has big bara monster men with man titties like you could never imagine

all the mfs that complain about no monster champs come make out w me and play dota and lets have homosexual gay sex

The true value of a game lies in what it leaves the player with after they've put it down. It follows thus, that the true job of any game developer, and by extension any artist, is to metaphorically fuck the viewer's mind and blow a hot sticky load of memetic material straight into their fertile cortical folds, ensuring the propagation of many healthy spiritual progeny. It was by this process of inspiration-impregnation that games like Bomb Rush Cyberfunk cum to be, and if Bomb Rush Cyberfunk went to my school I definitely would have bullied the ever-loving shit out of him for having such a stupid name. ButtFuck CyberTruck, CumSlut SiphonSpunk, Homestuck FuckingSucks, and possibly my favorite, ButtMush FiberFlush. I would be merciless, it would be so bad that he would go home early every day and his dad, Tony Hawk, would find him brooding in his room listening to old mixtapes on the Naganuma-compatible cd player his dead mother, Jet Set Radio, left behind. Tony didn't get why the boy held on to that stupid thing, and he could never figure out why that made him so goddamn mad. The way Jet Set Radio's eyes would wander when she did the pornstar grind, he knew she was putting on a show, but it wasn't for him. Now that I think about it, damn kid doesn't even look like me, doesn't trick like me... but the way he manuals, gliding effortlessly, perfectly balanced. I didn't teach him that. That's not skating, it's mockery, and I'm the one looking a fool, because he knows what I've always suspected but could never confirm, that I'm a real WashedUp SkaterCuck. You think you can hurt me? I've got news for you, kid: pain made the hawk a goddamn legend.

The belt lashes came hard and without warning, but Bomb Rush Cyberfunk's face remained a flat and inanimate mask. As the belt clattered to the floor, Tony hocked a loogie and spat on the poor skater.

"You're not even worth beating."

Bomb Rush starts the way you would expect every good gangbang to end, the team clearly poured a lot of love into that opening. It's a bold and bedroom-eyed promise for your forty bucks, but that's where the pretense drops and you're pop-n-locked in for 8 hours of mostly going through the motions. There's grinding, getting railed, turning tricks, and a dribbling climax, which admittedly feels kinda okay, but you gotta endure two awkward hours of post-nut clarity that leaves you wondering if "kinda okay" is the best you'll ever get, just like my fucking ex. Thanks, Lucy.

For a game about criminally defacing public property to unilaterally prescribe which sanitized street art jpegs you're allowed to raise the property value with... well, it sure as hell isn't vandalism, but it may as well be robbery for depriving the world of a better game. It's missing the point of graffiti so profoundly that I struggle to think of anything funnier to say other than to merely state as a fact that Jet Set Radio, the borrowed heart and soul of Bomb Rush Cyberfunk, HAS a graffiti editor.

There is a version of this game where I could have taken a sniper bullet to the head and had my corpse stomped on by metal gear because I painted a mural of Mario spreading his gaping anus over New Amsterdam, and the world of gaming is poorer to have never gotten it.

But hey, modding would be hella boring if it the devs supported it.

installing flesh augmentations to mine biocoins by drilling hundreds of holes into your teeth and filling the holes with Walmart™'s Biomass Filler®. getting hired to use your skullgun on the owner of a ski resort by his children. extremely pornographic ultra hyper suck and fucks. grapple with your appendix. the CEO mindset. stripping the organs from the residents of suburbanite households to sell on the stock market. the 640x480 resolution gifted to us by God. mass-produced sex slaves bred to serve their corporate overlords who can only scream and be fucked. teeth with teeth with teeth, take a bite.

Loadout change current trashed space. Tense discussions at the periphery hiding and seeking ballistic confectioneries. Combat. Combat droned crimson standoffs accelerate slaughter quick ziptied carefully.

Good boy.

Phone language carrier capacity broken torque dead ended demands. Castled sanity envelope firing squads. Manifesting a; late on rent early on work to rise noise gated communities. Implore once twice three trimes not even sniff up the powder down mauve cocktails try trye against. Reset undeath worship screaming gun sound affected glands of despair over producing. Experiments in pentagrammatical style but dont chew your food: regurgitate it. Still life in vitro clamoring. Diagnosed with character syndrome its charred. Pitch: Can do anything you pleased. Puh. Pee. Pitch: You're the master of your destiny. Purpet Pi- Strikeout: Decieted fucking moron. When in doubt crater your health away for a chance. Climbinginginging ladders fallinged over hog resources pork yourself alive just for a chance. gunked up, get pick sale choose a Quest desire for the whole load right on your face doctored glow.

Good boy.

Devastate the land its your oyster shuck it makes no difference oxygen for nobody steal your heart upsell it to the highest bitter choose life thats obvious choose reliving thats blunt carve your own turkey steal from the fand that heeds lookie there in the sun a happy contract scorch earth with flavor now 'Pitch:' thats what youre supposed to do buy borrow die ad infinitum. Man radiodated break down splice dials through the azure blastwave exit. Emptied lilac tongues were made for cutting no backstory only present belly for you. Futures' market twisting fun percent getting rocks off exchanging pleasures downstream. Die roll natural funny terse queries easy win instant found footage diagrammed explanations 'its like this' they say. Grooped dangstalkers of reason keep upcharging larval intents. Thrall applauds turns and say 'Youve been a naughty boy' stay hermetical cause zilch want that expense so drop it already.

Good boy!

can't hear anything over the sound of spider-tongues and boot leather

This review contains spoilers

The Game: "We have this villain who has a personal connection to Miles but she wants to take down this big corporation, who has been endangering people with their products, through aggressive means"

Me: "wait isn't that a good thing why are we fighting her"

The game: frantically shuffles papers "Uh, um... uh, she also wants to destroy Miles' neighbourhood, go fight her :)"

what does it mean to "feel like Spider-Man"? after all, that's the refrain we heard time and time again upon the release of Spider-Man for the PS4, and it's the question that I couldn't get out of my head every time I thought about this game.

looking at the mechanics of the game doesn't really answer that question for me, mostly because a shocking amount of the experience of this game is simply lifted wholesale from the Batman Arkham games with precious little alteration. the combat, the surprisingly present stealth sections that involve isolating a group of enemies with a chronic neck injury that prevents them from looking even slightly Up, "detective" segments that entirely involve looking for a yellow line to follow, even an omnipresent voice in your ear feeding you constant info, it's all as it was all the way back in 2009's Arkham Asylum, mostly unaltered. indeed, these games themselves were lauded at the time for "making you feel like Batman" but not nearly to the same hyperbolic memetic extent as marvel's sony's kevin feige's ike perlmutter's spider-man does for the ultimate arachnid-boy. generally speaking I would not consider Spider-Man and Batman to be characters that share an enormous deal in common outside of the very basic concept of fighting criminals in an urban environment, and in many ways there is an argument to be made that spider-man is batman's antithesis. and yet, somehow, essentially the same mechanics that created an experience that made you Feel Like Batman has made a great many people Feel Like Spider-Man.

the one meaningful mechanic which differentiates this from Arkham (though, maybe not as much as it perhaps should given the zip-to-point mechanic is again lifted completely wholesale from Arkham City) is the web-swinging, and it's a useful point in elucidating what the mechanical experience of this game does. web-swinging in this game is pleasing, stunningly well-animated, highly responsive, and also completely effortless. it's a struggle to even call it a mechanic: it is almost completely on auto-pilot, with nothing more involved than successive presses of R2 seeing Miles swing, leap, run on walls, the navigational experience of Spider-Man swinging through a painfully detailed recreation of Manhattan reduced to a single button. much like Assassin's Creed's automated free-running that clearly inspired the rhythms of play here, web swinging in this game looks fantastic - especially on a twitter clip captured with the patented SonyTM PlayStationTM ShareTM ButtonTM - but mechanically vacuous to the point of non-existence.

comparisons to Spider-Man 2's (the 2004 game, not this, the second instalment of the Marvel's Spider-Man franchise, nor the upcoming Marvel's Spider-Man 2, the third game in the Marvel's Spider-Man franchise) much lauded web swinging are passé, I know, but indulge me for just a moment: web-swinging in that game was beloved because it was a system. It had depth, it had a skill ceiling, it had moves that were difficult to pull off and a learning curve that required familiarity with the mechanic. it was enough to make a game in and of itself, and indeed it largely did because the rest of Spider-Man 2 ranges from unremarkable to poor. i don't know if i would go as far to say that this system "made me feel like spider-man" but it was, at the very least, a systemisation of this aspect of the character in such a way that it made for a compelling gameplay experience.

spider-man PS4 has none of this. it's mechanics are intentionally stripped down to the point that essentially the entire game is about pressing buttons at the right time in response to on-screen stimuli, and I know all video games can be boiled down to that, but Marvel's Spider-Man comes pre-boiled: the illusion it creates is so wafer thin that even a minute of thought reveals the 4K smoke and mirrors for what they really are. contrary to the appeals to the fraught concept of immersion the phrase "makes you feel like spider-man" evokes, I've scarcely felt more painfully aware that I am a person sitting on a sofa, holding a controller, than when playing this. when your entire game is frictionless, there's nothing to hang onto, either.

there is one sense in which the gameplay experience of Marvel's Miles Morales succeeds in capturing the spirit of the character, and that's in how his new powers frequently dissolve tension in the gameplay, with his invisibility offering you a fast charging get-out-of-jail-free card if you mess up the stealth (if being the operative word here) and the way almost every fight will end with an overpowered Venom Blast.

indeed, Marvel's Spider-Man: Miles Morales often does feel like a Spider-Man comic, but rarely in ways I enjoy. After tremendous backlash from vocal fans at the time to "The Night Gwen Stacy Died" issue of Spider-Man, Stan Lee (who at this point was increasingly disconnected from the actual goings-on of the universe he helped create to the point that he only knew Gwen was dead when someone at a con asked if she would come back to life) decreed that Marvel Comics should avoid meaningful change, change that might alienate longtime fans or, more importantly, those who wished to turn marvel characters into lunchboxes and action figures and cartoons and movies, and instead only offer the illusion of change. while the obvious response to this is that Peter Parker could only be replaced by his clone, Ben Reily, for a short period of time before the gravity of the status quo would pull Peter Parker back into the starring role, it also had something of a side-effect, which is that as a universe where meaningful change is resisted and avoided, Marvel Comics as a whole has a reactionary and conservative worldview that gravitates towards it's baked-in assumptions and the presumed goodness of those assumptions.

in 2004's Civil War, Marvel Comics sided with the PATRIOT act. In 2008's Secret Invasion, Marvel Comics used evil religious extremist shapeshifting Skrulls who hide among us and could be friends, co-workers, countrymen plotting the destruction of earth as an analogy for islamic terrorism. In 2012's Avengers VS X-Men, five heroes empowered by a cosmic force change the world for the better, curing diseases, ending world hunger, only to have those changes be rejected as unnatural, and eventually are consumed by said cosmic power. In 2019's House of X/Powers of X, the X-Men founded a nationalistic ethnostate for mutants that is an explicit parallel for the apartheid state of Israel and sees this as a good thing.

Whatever form it may take, whatever illusions of change may, however briefly, be affected, Marvel Comics are bound to a reflection of our status quo that is essentially desirable, and a huge amount of Superhero comics are about reinforcing their own status quos as well as our own, with high-profile stories such as DC's Doomsday Clock ultimately being nothing more than desperate appeals to the supposed self-evident relevance and importance of the unchanging status of these characters. All of this does not even mention the aggressive copaganda of the Marvel Cinematic Universe films, to the point where Captain Marvel was reproduced unaltered as propaganda for the US Air Force. Mainstream superheroes are always enforcers of the status quo, for good or for ill, but it's when the enforcement of that status quo comes up against depictions and discussions of the injustices of the real world that this becomes most uncomfortable.

There's a bit in this game, once you finish a side quest, where the camera pans up to a Black Lives Matter mural painted on the side of a building, and lingers there for just long enough to feel awkward. I don't object to the presence of this mural at all, but the direction decision here smacks as performative. It's not enough that the building is placed very prominently to ensure you can't miss it, but the game cranes itself to show you the image again, and the feeling of this can only really be described as the cinematography equivalent of "You know, I would have voted for Obama a third time if I could." It's desperate to demonstrate that it knows, it supports Black Lives Matter, but the functional reality of the rest of the game is aggressively at odds with what that movement is materially about.

I knew that the original 2018 Marvel's Spider-Man was in love with The Police but I can't describe how unprepared I still was for how aggressively conservative this game is. The story revolves around Miles Morales, while Peter Parker is on holiday to Generic Eastern Europeaistan, fighting against The Tinkerer and their evil plot to...destroy a product of an Evil Corporation that is giving people cancer. While at the eleventh hour they do contrive a reason why The Tinkerer's plan is #GoingTooFar, for most of the game there's actually no material reason for her to be in the wrong, and Miles Morales - and by extension, the game - is completely incapable of coming up with a single argument against her plan, simply resorting to "it's wrong! blowing things up is against the law!" or the classic "it's too risky! if even one person gets hurt that is too much!" said while Miles gives a Goon a severe concussion.

When I think of what Spider-Man means to me, what it is About, I think I'd describe it as the struggle to live up to an ideal of being our best selves, of always doing the right thing, in a world that makes that incredibly difficult to actually achieve, with our own personal failings and our endless conflicting responsibilities. In that sense, the Tinkerer, instrumentalized into meaningful action against an evil corporation by the death of a loved one, and struggling with how that affects her personal life and the relationships she has, is far more of a Spider-Man than Miles Morales in this game could ever be, given that his job is one of endless praise and assumed goodness facilitated by a hilarious uncritical depiction of the gig economy that sees the responsibility of Spider-Man morphed into a Deliveroo hustle grindset that always makes sure to respect Our Boys In Blue. How can something that loves the Police and hates direct action this much possibly claim to believe that Black Lives Matter?

In attempting to provide an "All-New, All-Different" up-to-date Spider-Man without making any effort to change the underlying assumptions it has about the world in which it lives, all this game does is expose how out of touch and outdated this whole concept is when the illusion of change fades away. Everything about this game is completely surface-level, all a well-presented illusion of Being Spider-Man that breaks the instant you think about it in any way, and you find yourself sitting your sofa, with your expensive toy for privileged people, pressing buttons to make the copaganda continue to play out in front of you.

I finished Marvel's Spider-Man: Miles Morales. I had a perfectly ok time. I was rarely frustrated and occasionally found it charming and visually enthralling. I liked stuff with Miles' uncle. It also made me feel like everything about this style of game and this type of story had hit an evolutionary dead-end and had nowhere to go but running on the same treadmill, forever.

So, yes. It made me feel like Spider-ManTM.

Oni

2001

If you play the PC version, download the Anniversary Edition. It fixes some bugs and also serves as a mod manager: https://wiki.oni2.net/Anniversary_Edition
___

Maybe best to approach this with a certain greybox appreciation. I don’t think there’s any level here that totally works, no vertical slice akin to "The Silent Cartographer," but there are a lot of cool ideas. Stuff like being able to slide over items to pick them up, thereby skipping a lengthy animation, or being able to go into an overcharge mode where your attack and defense are increased, are the kinds of nuances that an action game thrives on- encouraging you to play well, and, more importantly, to play stylishly.

It’s rare when it all comes together though, and aside from the obvious signs of a rough development, such as the barren levels and disjointed story, (inadvertently being the best tribute to anime and manga of the time, like we’re playing through the only translated portion of some massive series), I don’t know if the combat ever finds a real identity for itself. A lot of the encounters can feel sporadic, fighting an enemy every few minutes or so, in kind of awkward bouts that get very grab-heavy, often spending more time waiting for them to get up than actually fighting them. Feels like the sweet spot is two or three enemies, enough that you’re forced to manage the group with a few well-timed hits, but not so many that you can’t get any moves out. The potential for melee combat is also complicated by its interplay with ranged weapons- which is to say, guns render the melee combat nonexistent.

Well, it’s not entirely true, there are some great looking disarming animations, and because of the arsenal seeming to have been balanced around the axed multiplayer mode, you’re mainly avoiding weird projectile weapons that practically demand you to weave between shots to knock out the shooter. But when you get a gun, especially the power-weapons that litter the endgame, enemies have little in the way of a response, so the last few levels devolve into backpedaling around, firing away as Syndicate goons blithely run toward you.

(Wondering if it’s a problem of the style as much as anything else, the spartan environments and pragmatism of combat clashing with a game that’s trying to evoke Ghost in the Shell and The Matrix. Now I'm thinking reception to the gameplay might’ve been warmer if the game adopted a different aesthetic.)

After beating the game, I replayed some of the older levels to make sure my problems weren’t just a failure to understand it- and there was an appreciable sense of having improved. Had a surplus of health, armor, and weapons to mess around with, and was more consistently pulling off some of the moves that had given me trouble earlier, but it never gelled. There was always a bit of tension on its most basic level, gunplay invalidating much of the promise of the melee combat, and melee combat itself often failing to find value in your massive move list, boiling down to rolling around and trying to find a window of oppurtunity to pull off one of your high-damage grabs.

So I’m not hugely surprised that the game never got a sequel, but I am surprised some of its best ideas never caught on. The few occasions where everything clicked- where I’d slide into a guy, grab his gun, and then floor his buddy with a well-placed sidekick- they felt like Bungie tapping into some of the core appeals of the character-action genre years before anyone else. There’s something great yet to be made with the foundations of the gameplay here, just don’t know quite what it is.

I broke my glasses by stepping on them while playing Watch Dogs and that's basically my only memory of this game

Watch Dogs is a game set in the piss filled streets of Chicago, where you play as edgy permanently fourteen year old hackerman Aiden Pearce and do lots of hackerman stuff. The mainframe's are the cattle and you are the executive of Big Meat

First and foremost, this is the third time I've played this game. Why, you may ask? I have no fucking clue. The reception to this game wasnt super positive as you may know, and its yet another open world ubisoft game with a huge amount of side "content". The combat is nothing special but its serviceable, the driving is fine for the most part. The little puzzles you do sometimes to hack things are pretty fun actually. Really on a basic gameplay level its perfectly decent, nothing that is that special but nothing is terrible either. The story is surprisingly good, it has a lot of cool ideas that I felt were for the most part executed well. Aiden is such an edgelord that I find it pretty endearing. T-bone is a bro, Jordi is funny and Clara is a hot punk emo girl so yeah. The villains are pretty so-so but as long as you go in knowing you're playing Watch Dogs you may find liking the story more than anticipated.

Buttttt it does have its fair share of problems. They aren't really big issues necessarily but they are worth mentioning, and since I did every bit of content there was in this third playthrough It's actually what dropped the game to a 3.5 for me. First theres the terrible thing lots of open world games seem to do, and thats where the open world is usually big enough to do as you please but when you actually get down to it the missions are very, very restrictive. Go a little outside of an area because you wanna be creative? You're leaving the mission zone fuckass, get back in and play the game precisely how we dictate it. You can argue the story should be like that because they have a specific vision which is fine I suppose but the real problem of this is with the side missions. Often in them, you're tasked with knocking down enemies instead of killing them, and if you do so you auto fail the mission. But.. why?

This leads into another flaw with this game. The morality system. It "works" like most games. Kill people bad, save people good. In this game its completely fucking useless. You get discounts for high morality (more on this in a sec) and then with low morality civilians are more likely to call the po-po on you. So basically useless. Especially because the best (and practically only) way to make money in this game is by hacking into people's bank account as they walk by. This is cool in concept but outside of outright gunning down everyone you see its perhaps one of the most messed up things you can do, but of course it doesnt effect your morality for whatever reason. A further proof of its inconsistency is what I was talking about earlier with the forced take downs. You absolutely have to keep these randomly generated side characters alive or you fail. Then what is the fucking point of having a morality system? Its not a big deal in the end I suppose but its just so fucking stupid you have to restart these missions for this especially if you're playing Aiden with low morality. It makes no sense. Of course on top of this his morality is mentioned vaguely in the story but its always kept perfectly in the middle ground so it doesnt ever effect the ending or anything of the such, which Is ultimately a good thing because its implemented so terribly but in the end it just feels like Ubisoft chasing a trend instead of actually implementing a useful or engaging mechanic. Okay that rant is over I usually dont care about gameplay much but i just spent 40 hours in this game in like 3-4 days you don't understand what my brain is going through rn.

The game also deals with some pretty heavy subject matter. There are collectible strands about a serial killer and even human trafficking which is something the story gets into as well. I think these are pretty interesting and didnt really have a problem with the game showcasing these topics, but there are some parts where the game just goes too far. These moments are mostly in another collectible strand called privacy invasion, which i never bothered with and also am not like 13 years old anymore so playing them now just made me feel weird. Basically for these collectibles you hack into servers and spy on people for a minute. A few of these, especially ones you get access to in the story or the ctos towers are really funny, but when you get into the actual side mission a lot of them just felt gross and left me sitting there thinking "Um okay ubisoft thanks for sharing" I wont get into them but they just felt really needlessly edgy and maybe you could say thats commentary on spying on people or some bullshit but I just think they let a sociopath into the writing room.

What really hit me though was a moment while playing through the main story. Theres this thing in the game called profiling, and it shows you little details about the random people in the world. Sometimes it says wacky stuff like killed a dolphin, dating twins, is a member of isis or other silly things (side note: sometimes it'll say something like transgender or asexual which while isnt really much, the inclusion is welcome). It may also say something like "father of two" to people you just killed so it's just like The Last of Us 2 but better. Im going off rails a bit but just stay with me here. The profiler also often tells you their age, but its randomly generated of course. And so in the main story at one point you basically raid a drug compound, and I happened to profile an armed soldier whos brains I just blew the fuck out with a shotgun only to find that it said..

Age = 15

And this was a really uh, conflicting moment for me. Now im not saying all this to complain about dark subject matter, truthfully I often enjoy dark shit in fiction but this just felt a bit too far. It made me sick. Now sure it's just randomly generated so Aiden didnt react to this in any way or anything like that, but I feel like the fact that It could happen at all says a lot about this game as a whole. Its not that it handles its dark subject matter poorly, its just that it doesnt handle it all. It doesnt tackle any dark topics, it just chases them and waves them in your face saying "look, look at this. fucked up init?"

Okay. So. All that being said. This game was still really damn fun. I know i just spent 90% of this review ragging on this game and yeah does it ethically deserve like a 3/5 at best? yeah. probably. But I am not exagerating when I say this game consumed me for days and I literally had no motivation or desire to play anything else. And this was on my THIRD playthrough. I have no idea what made me play this so much but I did and damn I probably will again five years from now too. For now though, I got all the collectibles. Got everything I wanted out of this game. And thats good enough for me. Time to move on. Watch Dogs 2 will get its chance to improve when I get to it this summer.

Trophy Completion - 79% (30/40)
Time Played - 39 hours 22 minutes
Nancymeter - 75/100
Game Completion #65 of 2022
May Completion #15

A good way to make me dig your tunes is to give me some lil minigames that hit an overall vibe to your album. It was pretty good stuff. Some kinda standard rock stuff, but it sounded pretty good, had some decently strong songs, and some fun little game parody minigames that worked. They were partially just interactive toys, but a couple genuinely passed as games. Fun, cute, and worth a half hour.