Log Status
Completed
Playing
Backlog
Wishlist
Rating
Time Played
--
Days in Journal
2 days
Last played
July 9, 2023
First played
July 4, 2023
Platforms Played
Come with me - into my mind cave - follow along, humor me, and participate in a thought experiment:
Picture, in front of you, a viddy game - you may be familiar with the concept, but a bideogame is usually experienced through the medium of a "screen" - picture one such in front of you. Inside the screen is a place a Zelda fan might be familiar with - beautiful Hyrule in all its comfort and charm. A cozy place, one that reminds you of adventure. The rolling hills are bursting with green grass, and even the shade of the forest seems homely - now, in front of the screen in your mind, place a hand to cover up half of it so that you can no longer see it - imagine, in that same hand, an erect cock, thin and sharp - and now imagine as the dangerously upright member swipes across your beloved Hyrule and Link follows its scent around - this is, believe it or not, the only way to play this villogame. It's not in your mind, it's here, for the Nintendo DS.
It's definitely better than PH just from not having to repeat the same dungeon several times but then it commits suicide in the latter half for no apparent reason and throws possibly the worst final dungeon in all of Zelda history at you. Zelda actually doing stuff and being a character is cool but then she's immediately made into the most annoying mechanic in the game and somehow - SOMEHOW - they managed to give her an even worse movement system than the fucking pointer. This is a feat. Satan would give you a medal for this.
Having skillcheck mechanics on the DS microphone is an awful idea.
"But I had this game as a chil-" If I saw you on the playground playing this I would fill your DS with sand - this was just one of my many hobbies as a young man. Another would be killing you.
Picture, in front of you, a viddy game - you may be familiar with the concept, but a bideogame is usually experienced through the medium of a "screen" - picture one such in front of you. Inside the screen is a place a Zelda fan might be familiar with - beautiful Hyrule in all its comfort and charm. A cozy place, one that reminds you of adventure. The rolling hills are bursting with green grass, and even the shade of the forest seems homely - now, in front of the screen in your mind, place a hand to cover up half of it so that you can no longer see it - imagine, in that same hand, an erect cock, thin and sharp - and now imagine as the dangerously upright member swipes across your beloved Hyrule and Link follows its scent around - this is, believe it or not, the only way to play this villogame. It's not in your mind, it's here, for the Nintendo DS.
It's definitely better than PH just from not having to repeat the same dungeon several times but then it commits suicide in the latter half for no apparent reason and throws possibly the worst final dungeon in all of Zelda history at you. Zelda actually doing stuff and being a character is cool but then she's immediately made into the most annoying mechanic in the game and somehow - SOMEHOW - they managed to give her an even worse movement system than the fucking pointer. This is a feat. Satan would give you a medal for this.
Having skillcheck mechanics on the DS microphone is an awful idea.
"But I had this game as a chil-" If I saw you on the playground playing this I would fill your DS with sand - this was just one of my many hobbies as a young man. Another would be killing you.