6 reviews liked by FGC_Connoisseur


We're starting to see the return of old Mikami.

This is a total asshole nitpick on my end, but I am pretty disappointed that this game stays in 4/4 time signature most of the game. Mechanically, it's the best way to introduce the core Stylish Action (or Character Action, if you prefer, but I'll take my nomenclature from the people who actually made the genre) combo systems, 4/4 measure of a two quarter notes, quarter rest, then another quarter note doing the classic "X, X, nothing, X" styles of combos. Not having any penalty for getting off the beat ensures that it's not too demanding, there's no chance of failure and only rewards via an increase in damage.

But by the fifth or so mission the novelty was wearing off and all I was left with was an above average Stylish Action game that's gimmick isn't as defining to the game as it wants you to think. How cool would it be to have a stealth mission in a 2/2 time signature where you need to use slower and more deliberately placed presses for dashing, or a hectic boss fight in 6/8? It feels like a major missed opportunity for a game that's whole identity is rhythm.

This review contains spoilers

FUCK vs WHORE

my mom got mad at me for scribbling all over my game case with crayon as a youngin', fuck you Neutron.

Look the main thing with this game is it's a port of a PS2/Wii game that grew a cult following and this version has online play. There's nothing new added outside of that I don't think, but the online play works fine. After a full playthrough of the main game mode with a friend over several play sessions, we only disconnected I think 3 or 4 times. Considering this was a 15 hour playthrough, that doesn't sound too bad. The rest of this review is going to be on the game itself since I never played it on the PS2 or Wii.

Dokapon Kingdom is certainly an interesting game. Basically imagine if Mario Party and Fortune Street had a baby and that baby decided it wanted to be an RPG when it grew up. It's incredibly fun, but it does have some caveats with that combination. Like if you REALLY want to test some friendships, play this.

When I say it's like an RPG, I don't mean in just aesthetics or that it has turn based combat instead of minigames. A big thing here that might turn some people off is the length of the main mode. It's a full 8 chapter adventure that can last a pretty long time if luck isn't on anyone's side and if nobody has a good strategy. Your typical Mario Party game can last maybe a couple hours if you play with the max amount of rounds (and less than an hour if you play with the fewest). Like I said earlier, this one playthrough with a friend and a CPU controlled player lasted 15 hours over the course of several play sessions. There's no options for shorter games unless you pick a different game mode that plays completely differently. I think it would have been nice if you could pick the amount of chapters you play with the final boss scaling to work with less chapters. It's not like there's a compelling plot in this game since it's all treated as a cute, charming, and fun "save the princess" story. Like anything in chapters 1-7 could be swapped around in terms of what happens and it wouldn't change anything.

The CPU was something my friend and I found really annoying. It tended to always get exactly what it wanted no matter what and, in the second half of the game, would often bounce between going for the story objective and running around trying to get the game's version of bonus stars rewarded at the end. The game also tended to always give the CPU the good outcome in games of chance, so it never really felt fair and balanced for my friend and me. Best advice is to never play the game with a CPU controlled character cause it just sucks the fun out of it. Find someone to play with that is willing to play through the full adventure with you.

The actual adventure itself is pretty fun. The board game gimmick combined with the RPG mechanics really helps set it apart and creates fun and hectic scenarios. The combat is very simple with you given a basic attack, a super powerful attack that can result in your death if the enemy counters it, a magic attack, and a special ability. For defense you have a basic guard, a counter for that super strong attack, a magical guard, and just giving up. Trying to strategically figure out what you want to do makes for a ton of fun and gives a great laugh when things either go how you want or fail in spectacular fashion. Only issue I have is one that didn't bug me till super late game. Some spells and monster abilities can break your equipment which can deal a massive blow to your attack and defense (unless you specialize in magic which I never saw a downside to doing). In most of the game it's fine cause weapons and shields are pretty cheap and easy to replace. In the last 2 chapters, though, getting something good is dumb expensive and most likely something you'll only get to do once. I kind of wish every weapon store carried a cheap weapon and shield for situations like this, or at least have the church give you a free weak one if you're unequipped. This way you're not having to run back extremely far distances and then running in circles to get into a weapon store to buy something, but you're also not going to get some stupidly broken weapon for free (yes I know stealing is a mechanic, but it's also a game of chance so I'm not the biggest fan of it).

I do think this game is great when you have someone to play with. I'm super glad it got ported to Switch and maybe someday it'll get ported to more systems like PC or the PS5 and Series X. Does suck it came out around the same time as Tears of the Kingdom, so even less eyes were on it (heck I didn't even know it was releasing until I randomly saw it on Twitter from Gematsu and never saw a single ad or trailer uploaded for it). Only place I even see a trailer uploaded is from GameTrailers. Not even the publisher or Nintendo uploaded it.

I'm truly a doomed human being if Sabotage could make my lizard brain work with pixelated under boob.