Much of Metroid is fascinating, but it is AGONIZING to play. I lamented Metroid: Zero Mission for the simple fact that it didn’t capture the essence of the original Metroid nor did it lean into its unique action-oriented tone enough. I’ve played the original on and off, and this time, I used a guide and minimal rewinding to get to the end. There are several things in Metroid that made me unable to breathe properly. Now that I’ve played it all the way through, I feel sheer relief.

It gets a lot right despite its most sung flaws. The controls are tight, weaving through the weird enemy movements is fun, getting stronger and being able to access more of the map is fun, and you know what? Charting out your own maps on paper is cool, I tried it this time around! It’s a first attempt at a game that this very series would knock out of the park less than a decade later. If this were a random run-N-gun game with a linear map, and a sequential list of upgrades to gain, I wouldn’t be talking about it, because no one would have cared about it. It was innovative, it helped spawn an entire genre, and I respect it, but PHEW.

Be it with or without a guide; with or without save states; in a weekend or over the course of a year, I’m done, I’m not going to see this through again. And while I had some fun with it, nah, I’ll just stick with Zero Mission, faults and all. Godspeed Metroid, and I hate you too.

I’ve built this game up to be a monolith in the 4 years I’ve had it borrowed, and the 4 years it’s been rotting on my backlog. I finally beat it, and what a ride it was!

In all systems, Bowser’s Inside Story boasts a happy medium between the other two games I’ve played in the Mario & Luigi series - not too monotonous (Superstar Saga), not too convoluted (Paper Jam).

Exploration in the overworld is a little lacking for both parties. I wasn’t compelled to explore too much as Bowser, mostly compelled by the combat. As the brothers, you spend most of your time in the overworld exploring places you’ve already seen as Bowser. That’s not to say there aren’t good elements here though, some areas for the brothers are fun, like the optional content in Plack Beach and the depths of Dimble Woods. This game’s journey is at its best when real progression and environmental change is felt. I disliked having a useful fast travel system gated by having it hidden in one of a hundred breakable stage elements; I liked the unique ways for Bowser to change his environment - sneezing to blow the sails of ships by playing a minigame as the brothers, et cetera.

Combat serves all other elements of this game. It compels me to explore, find upgrades for my party, and endears me more to our protagonists and their story. Bowser is a lumbering beast who is at times a bit bratty and childish, but also quite dominative and intimidating. He’s one character, but is controlled with two buttons ala Mario and Luigi - not sacrificing complexity between both styles of combat, and painting Bowser as a more complex being himself through gameplay. His special attacks also show this, using touch-controls to make a less acrobatic Bowser still have a variety of cool, character-relevant moves to unleash on his enemies.

Enemies highlight the differences between both parties quite well. For example, the Crawfuls who need jumps and hammers to evade are easily countered by a punch from Bowser - his vacuum ability especially highlights the sheer difference in power between him and the brothers - for its use in this encounter, and many more. There are few enemies, but none of them are as simple as they let on, and are shown a lot of care through their charming animations.

Mario and Luigi boast their most interesting swathe of special attacks yet - they don’t ask too much of you, but manage to be a fun, increasingly-difficult test of a lot of things you’ve come to expect from the series - memorization, timing, button-presses, positioning, sometimes all at once. I can hardly choose a favourite because so many of them are fantastic - I really loved the ‘Jump Helmet,’ ‘You Hoo Cannon,’ ‘Spin Pipe,’ and ‘Magic Window.’ Interplay between Bowser and bros in battle is a little underwhelming, especially with how few Bowser boss-fights are co-requisite with the bros. A few more enemies acting this way, and one or two more bosses like this would have gone a long way - but overall, every encounter is really fun - as brief and as difficult as necessary. This aspect of the game is (deservedly) the most polished.

The first part of Bowser’s Inside Story focuses on Bowser’s struggles and ambitions, which later culminate in Mario and Luigi unceremoniously escaping his body. Then the game shifts to a search for three “Star Cures,” each found in a mix of settings. Finally, the game shifts to the final act with no fanfare. This is a problem, but it thankfully didn’t bother me too much when I enjoyed the journey through these acts a lot. Specifically, I love Bowser. He is depicted in such a sympathetic way, I felt his triumph and I felt his rage, I loved seeing where he’d go next and what he’d have to say about it. The kaiju-battles are particularly great at making me invested in his character - there’s a fantastic scale, weight, and motivation to them.

It’s hard to not get attached to the narrative this game weaves together. While this narrative is very meandering, it’s also a tightly paced game because of that, rarely suffering from fatigue because of its breadth of varied content. The two types of main combat + the kaiju-battles, the minigames, and the two explorable worlds, all influence each other in some way, and paired with such charming protagonists (and a great antagonist!) make for an incredibly enjoyable time from beginning to end. And it ends on a very high note, the final act is the my favourite in the game, and synthesizes all of the aforementioned content better than at any other point.

Where Bowser wanted to go, I wanted to go, who he wanted to fight, I wanted to fight, and ultimately, he stands tall as the main reason I have fallen in love with this game, through its many flaws, and its even greater amount of triumphs, having finally played it.

The most underwhelming Mario RPG I've played.

Outside of the main cast, I can count on no hands how many characters I found charming. I'd rather not talk about Booster, and I think the closest thing to a side character I did feel compelled by was Dodo.

And even when I was compelled, I felt like things didn't go anywhere. I feel like the recurrence of certain characters, like Croco appearing a stoic while selling you items in the final act of the game, is supposed to make me feel much more strongly than it actually does. Valentina just leaves the premises after you defeat her with zero fanfare. And while I like the pacing of this game, I don't think adding a few elements to flesh out the various story arcs in this game would have hurt. Bosses fall limply and lifelessly over when you defeat them, the combat is easy & monotonous, and I'm just left feeling this dissonance between how whimsical the game looks at a standstill, and how utterly lifeless it is in motion.

(I audibly laughed when Speardovich's battle took place in a completely different location at a completely different time from what was showing in the overworld)

Super Mario RPG is FAR from all bad, the remastered soundtrack is fantastic; the visuals look nice; the main cast is a fun bunch; while the game is easy, and monotonous as hell, the pacing rarely suffers at any point; and there's certainly charm here - but these moments of awe and enjoyment can often feel few and far between!

Even the visuals, which look nice, have a very lifeless look, and at times I yearn to have experienced a remake that took a better job translating the essence of the original, one that took a few more risks, and was maybe less faithful / exact.

I can say I had fun! I enjoyed some character moments. And since the Mario RPG I played before this was Mario & Luigi: Paper Jam, I can definitely appreciate the more subtle writing in this game (save for how rushed certain moments can feel).

I love you Mallow <3