This game…it made me cry……

Cry out of frustration that is.

I have a rocky relationship with the Mario franchise, especially nowadays. That said there was a point in time where I was obsessed with Mario, I pretty much consumed everything Mario related I could get my hands on. However I was the sort of kid that ate up anything that was given to me no matter the quality, I wouldn’t even dare to touch anything that wasn’t made by Nintendo, it was that bad. Now that I’m older, I’ve expanded my taste by venturing into other properties like Wario Land and the DKC games. I even broke free of the Nintendo shackles by getting myself hooked into Sonic and Crash Bandicoot, Sonic especially has taken over to the point that I can’t imagine myself passing up anything new from the blue blur. Recently though I decided to go back to some of the old Mario games and see how well they’ve held up. I was able to reach a conclusion, and that conclusion…is that I had terrible taste. Holy shit, I can’t believe how mid this franchise is, it’s absolutely inexcusable. Every single 2D Mario’s been the same damn thing since 1985 with very few changes every now and then, Mario Kart is a boring slog that’s stuffed with some of the most annoying items I’ve seen in a video game, Mario Party isn’t as boring but that’s mostly due to the frustrating RNG aspects, and the current state of the other Mario spinoffs is straight up pathetic. Don’t even get me started on how insultingly shitty the recent Paper Marios like Sticker Star and The Origami King are like goddamn. Despite my gripes, I still think there’s some good here and there. Sunshine and the Galaxy games are genuinely great and of course most of the earlier Mario RPGs are fantastic. I couldn’t get myself into SMRPG due to how mind-numbingly easy and outdated it felt, but man I have to give a shoutout to the goat TTYD for still being peak Mario almost 20 years later, I doubt it’s getting topped anytime soon.

So where does Mario Wonder fit in all of this? Of course, I watched the Direct where the game was first revealed, and my expectations were very mixed, obviously. On one hand, I couldn’t care less about yet another mid 2D Mario being pumped out, but on the other, it actually seemed like they were putting effort into a Mario game for once, something that this franchise’s been lacking for at least a decade now. After purchasing the game and completing everything that there is to offer, I’ll at least say this: it’s a start.

Now I can’t deny that the game is visually stunning, it’s great to finally move on from the ugly ass plastic look that’s plagued every single NSMB game. Apparently the Mario Movie inspired the visuals here which is a bit of a surprise. Personally I found the movie very mid, especially when it came to the narrative aspect and I wouldn’t even call it the best video game adaptation this year (That would go to my nigga Five Night’s at Freddys), but if this is what’s making 2D Mario actually look appealing for once, then by all means I’m down for it. Though I have to say that sometimes they go way too far with the visuals. Some of the Wonder Effects are such a sensory overload that I had to dim the brightness down so it wouldn’t bug me as much, it really feels a bit forced at times. For the Wonder Effects themselves, I enjoy them as a concept, they’re definitely a nice change of pace from everything that came before. A 2D Mario that has more than boring ass platforming???? I never thought I’d see the day! Though I have to admit these segments are very much overhyped. Now for sure they’re better than everything else that came before it, but I wouldn’t say it’s that much of a substantial improvement. There’s some good ones here and there like time alternating between fast and slow, as well as the one that brings back the Cosmic Clones from the Galaxy games, but the majority of these effects end up being very mediocre and it doesn’t help that a lot of them end up being repeated over time, which only ends up making the game feel more repetitive. There’s only so many times a musical number can pop out and bring the pacing to a halt before I get so sick and bored that I wish I’d be playing something more engaging instead.

Then comes the horrible realization if you choose not to engage with the Wonder Seeds because goddamn the quality of these levels return to NSMB kinds of mid without them. It’s kinda hilarious just how much the level design is carried by them when you think about it. You either have to go through various gimmicks ranging from neat concepts to straight up autopilot territory which you’ll likely be doing if you’re going for 100% completion like I did, or you choose to ignore them and experience level design that’s no different than what the previous 2D Marios have churned out over the years. The worse levels are without the doubt the airship levels which are the same damn slow autoscrollers they’ve been since SMB3, and no the Wonder Effects that take place don’t improve them in the slightest. At the end of each one you’re greeted with a copy and pasted corridor with a switch at the end, the only thing making them different being slightly different obstacles and enemies. There’s only 3 of these airships yet each one feels like it drags on forever. It’d actually be an improvement if they weren’t here at all, absolute filler. The bosses are pretty filler as well, and by bosses, I mean Bowser Jr.. I just LOVE having to fight Bowser Jr. FOUR different times with very little changes in each battle, thanks Nintendo! It seriously bugs me that a game trying to be so creative as this one is restricting itself to just Bowser Jr. when SM64 which came out TWENTY SEVEN YEARS EARLIER had more variety and creativity with its boss fights. They don’t even bother giving 2 of the Worlds boss fights of their own, but if I had to choose between that or facing Bowser Jr. another 2 times then I’d rather have nothing. The final boss fight is a huge disappointment as well. It’s just another giant hands and head boss that Nintendo has not only done before, but has also done BETTER before. It’s just not comparable to something like Rudy the Clown or Wham Bam Jewel, and that’s not even mentioning Andross which takes place in an entirely different genre!

Another thing that disappoints me about the game is the barebones story. It baffles me how TTYD was able to create such an engaging and memorable narrative, yet here we are years later with Mario Wonder and it can’t even compare to anything from there. Yes I understand mainline Mario doesn’t really excel when it comes to storytelling, even including the 3D games, but it frustrates me how there’s so much effort into what a lot of the RPG games were capable of telling that the main stuff can’t even come close to achieving a similar level of. It’s especially frustrating that other platformers like Hollow Knight and Celeste that released years earlier were able to have a perfect balance of wonderful storytelling and gameplay yet a game called Super Mario Bros. WONDER fumbles with both aspects. Sonic 3 was released all the way back in 1994 and was able to create a more cohesive world and narrative without as much as a single line of dialogue, while being fun to play nonetheless! There’s nothing in this game motivating me to care about the Flower Kingdom and its inhabitants, there’s no emotional attachment whatsoever. The Poplins are quite literally Toads in a new coat of paint and the more important ones like the Master Poplin look no different from the regular ones outside of a different color scheme. I can’t say I’m a fan of the Talking Flowers either. Hearing them speak during the first trailer made me visibly cringe and by the time I started playing the game I disabled their voices as soon as possible lmao. I just can’t understand why mainline Mario is forever destined to have such lackluster storytelling.

I don’t have much else to talk about this game, and that’s because there’s not anything else interesting to discuss about it. I’ll admit, it’s the best 2D Mario even if there’s not much of a competition to begin with, but that aside I wouldn’t exactly call this a huge step up. There’s some good ideas like a few of the Wonder Seed Effects and the new power-ups introduced but everything else about the game gives off a huge sense of mediocrity that a lot of Mario related media since the Wii U and 3DS era has given me. I swear I can’t count how many times I’d boot this game up only to lose interest after a couple levels and switch over to something more engaging like Sonic Frontiers or Pikmin 4 that I’d end up playing for hours on end. It doesn’t really help that this is nowhere near close to the best platformer that’s been released THIS year. Sonic Superstars’s level design blows Wonder’s out of the water and although Kirby’s Return to Dream Land Deluxe is a remake, it still has so many more things going on with it to keep you engaged which is surprisingly the standard for the Kirby franchise. And of course how could I even forget or not even mention the fact that Pizza Tower is right there. It’s amazing how a single person was able to craft a much more memorable and fun experience than an entire team over at Nintendo, it also helps that the game is inspired by Wario Land which completely mods every single Mario lmfao, this one included. Speaking of Wario, it baffles me how 2D Mario is still behind many other platforming games, especially when Nintendo themselves have already created games like Tropical Freeze and Wario Land 4 in the past which still hold up today. It’s embarrassing how a 22 year old GBA game holds up much better than this year’s current Mario, though I can’t say I’m surprised because Wario’s always been that much better it’s not even a contest.

Of all the games I’ve played this year, Mario Wonder really is the biggest disappointment. Game of the Year contender is not even in the consideration since not only has better Nintendo games like Tears of the Kingdom and Pikmin 4 released, Pikmin 4 in particular being so incredible that it almost rivals the masterpiece that is Pikmin 2, but Spider-Man 2 might possibly shape up to be my personal favorite this year, with me having watched Across the Spider-Verse earlier which has only further cemented my opinion. It’s insane how both were released on the same day yet one is so much better, my condolences to everyone who spent their cash on Wonder. This is a step in the right direction for Mario I can’t deny that, but I still can’t help but feel that I expected much more out of this, though I suppose that’s a bit unrealistic considering Nintendo’s shitty management with Mario nowadays. I’m not sure whether I consider Mario Wonder mid or not, but I can at least say that it’s less mid than nearly everything else Mario related in these recent years. My expectations for Mario’s future have not improved much and I have doubts that it’ll improve any further, but I’ll be willing to let it slide just this once if Nintendo is willing to keep Pikmin from falling from irrelevancy. Here’s to hoping we don’t have to wait another decade for Pikmin 5!