ImmortanJones
Konstantin should've died from an infection with those gross-ass stigmata hands he kept dripping blood out of all the time. Put on some Band-Aids, man, shit's nasty.
3.5 out of 5.
Lara "My Side or Genocide" Croft back at it again!
3.5 out of 5.
Lara "My Side or Genocide" Croft back at it again!
2021
(Full review in the works.)
Troy Baker sounds like he's having fun and at the end of the day, that's really all that matters.
Troy Baker sounds like he's having fun and at the end of the day, that's really all that matters.
2012
Journey is a truly exceptional game. From Austin Wintory's weeping brass and strings to the feelings of quiet isolation evoked by the game's vast literal sandboxes, Journey provides an experience I've yet to have with any other game. Hell, it does a better job of eliciting stronger emotions out of me than some of my favorite films. This is a game that begs to be played by anyone with a pulse. It is a beautiful, expressive tale of perseverance in a world long gone, the reminders of past injustices forever etched into the golden sands. Praise be to ThatGameCompany's eternal beauty - we may never see its like again.
4.5 out of 5.
Searching for the soundtrack on iTunes is a nightmare.
4.5 out of 5.
Searching for the soundtrack on iTunes is a nightmare.
2019
This review contains spoilers
"To be Bowman, flying into the monolith, ready to see... to understand."
Control is as brilliant as it is obtuse, a Jungian action-horror adventure set in the extra-dimensional Oldest House, home to the Federal Bureau of Control, a secret division of the US government tasked with containing and studying paranatural items found throughout history. The player takes on the role of Jesse Faden, the Bureau's new director. On her first day as head of this alien organization, Faden is tasked with halting a world-ending threat plaguing the Oldest House and its residents, mixing third-person gunfights with telekinetic melee in a spectacle of particle physics and environmental destruction that probably had the folks at EA DICE creaming their jeans.
For as much as I could wax poetic about the visual splendor and immaculate art direction in Control, I feel as though letting the weaker elements of the game - mainly progression and the narrative - off the hook would do a disservice to my reputation as someone who constantly complains about things that, in the grand scheme of all, don't matter too much but will definitely piss off the wrong people. So, yeah: progression in Control is a bungled hackjob. Remedy's idea of a skill tree is stat boosts that turn the game into a lopsided power fantasy, making the once thrilling combat combos of "shoot this, launch a chair at that" a rhythm game where the player needs to time their reload with their stamina regen. And this is all without mentioning how utterly useless most of the secondary abilities and weapon mods are as you invariably max out Jesse's ability to dome a dude with a brick at Mach 10. There was very little incentive to switch weapon types over the course of that game as most are ineffectual in close to long range combat. Compounding that frustration is that fact that Jesse's Service Weapon (as cool as it is) can only slot two weapon types at a time, making hotswapping to various mods an impossibility during combat. At the end of the day, however, the act of launching office supplies at nameless goons will never get old, so Remedy can skirt by on having one cool feature that saves this game's combat from utter dismalness.
Narratively, Control doesn't fare any better. The basic plot of Jesse working her way through the shifting halls of the Oldest House in search of a way to stop the extra-dimensional threat within leads to the game's more "gamey" aspects ala Metroidvania-style backtracking and skill acquisitions, but the meta-narrative of the collective unconscious and other Jungian concepts leaking into a game about a girl searching for purpose falls flat as Jesse is less so a well-rounded, believable character, and more of a ride-along for the player that just so happens to be related to one of the antagonists. Or THE antagonist, I guess. Most of the important players in the story of Control are either dead or missing by the start of the game, so it's up to the player to come to their own conclusions as to how things are the way they are by rifling through the hundreds of supplementary text-based side stories that litter the halls of the Oldest House. Many of them are written in the style of the SCP Foundation, so it's clear Sam Lake has been spending a bit of time surfing the web since Quantum Break shit itself on release. The only saving grace in this regard is Matthew Poretta's portrayal of Dr. Caspar Darling, the Bureau's (former) Head of Research. Darling provides context and goofy asides in the form of pre-recorded presentations that Jesse runs across in her time at the Oldest House, and is one of the few genuinely interesting characters in the whole of the game. Aside from Darling's inclusion, the rest of my critique stands: Control has a lifeless narrative and an even more lifeless characters. It doesn't help that Jesse's internal monologue is reiterative of literally everything the player can see and gather through context or by, oh, I dunno - playing the goddamn game.
Initially, I had planned this to be a review that covered the expansions in this game as well as the core narrative, but my problems with the base game still remain, despite how excited I am at the prospect of an Alan Wake sequel that was teased at the end of the second DLC. You can tease me all you want Sam Lake, I'll believe it when I see it. (And that's another problem, too, the AWE expansion did very little aside from say, "Hey, maybe, maybe, Alan Wake-y, too?") Control is a mixed bag, as some cool cats would say, but more than that, I think it's uneven. Its concepts, art direction, and level design are robust and constantly jaw-dropping. Again, these visuals are just... I don't know, pick a word out of a hat that's synonymous with exasperated admiration - they're phenomenal. But execution is just as important to me as intention, and I don't think Control sticks the landing where it needs to.
3 out of 5.
"I'm the Director of the Federal Bureau of Control and you've gotta deal with it!"
Control is as brilliant as it is obtuse, a Jungian action-horror adventure set in the extra-dimensional Oldest House, home to the Federal Bureau of Control, a secret division of the US government tasked with containing and studying paranatural items found throughout history. The player takes on the role of Jesse Faden, the Bureau's new director. On her first day as head of this alien organization, Faden is tasked with halting a world-ending threat plaguing the Oldest House and its residents, mixing third-person gunfights with telekinetic melee in a spectacle of particle physics and environmental destruction that probably had the folks at EA DICE creaming their jeans.
For as much as I could wax poetic about the visual splendor and immaculate art direction in Control, I feel as though letting the weaker elements of the game - mainly progression and the narrative - off the hook would do a disservice to my reputation as someone who constantly complains about things that, in the grand scheme of all, don't matter too much but will definitely piss off the wrong people. So, yeah: progression in Control is a bungled hackjob. Remedy's idea of a skill tree is stat boosts that turn the game into a lopsided power fantasy, making the once thrilling combat combos of "shoot this, launch a chair at that" a rhythm game where the player needs to time their reload with their stamina regen. And this is all without mentioning how utterly useless most of the secondary abilities and weapon mods are as you invariably max out Jesse's ability to dome a dude with a brick at Mach 10. There was very little incentive to switch weapon types over the course of that game as most are ineffectual in close to long range combat. Compounding that frustration is that fact that Jesse's Service Weapon (as cool as it is) can only slot two weapon types at a time, making hotswapping to various mods an impossibility during combat. At the end of the day, however, the act of launching office supplies at nameless goons will never get old, so Remedy can skirt by on having one cool feature that saves this game's combat from utter dismalness.
Narratively, Control doesn't fare any better. The basic plot of Jesse working her way through the shifting halls of the Oldest House in search of a way to stop the extra-dimensional threat within leads to the game's more "gamey" aspects ala Metroidvania-style backtracking and skill acquisitions, but the meta-narrative of the collective unconscious and other Jungian concepts leaking into a game about a girl searching for purpose falls flat as Jesse is less so a well-rounded, believable character, and more of a ride-along for the player that just so happens to be related to one of the antagonists. Or THE antagonist, I guess. Most of the important players in the story of Control are either dead or missing by the start of the game, so it's up to the player to come to their own conclusions as to how things are the way they are by rifling through the hundreds of supplementary text-based side stories that litter the halls of the Oldest House. Many of them are written in the style of the SCP Foundation, so it's clear Sam Lake has been spending a bit of time surfing the web since Quantum Break shit itself on release. The only saving grace in this regard is Matthew Poretta's portrayal of Dr. Caspar Darling, the Bureau's (former) Head of Research. Darling provides context and goofy asides in the form of pre-recorded presentations that Jesse runs across in her time at the Oldest House, and is one of the few genuinely interesting characters in the whole of the game. Aside from Darling's inclusion, the rest of my critique stands: Control has a lifeless narrative and an even more lifeless characters. It doesn't help that Jesse's internal monologue is reiterative of literally everything the player can see and gather through context or by, oh, I dunno - playing the goddamn game.
Initially, I had planned this to be a review that covered the expansions in this game as well as the core narrative, but my problems with the base game still remain, despite how excited I am at the prospect of an Alan Wake sequel that was teased at the end of the second DLC. You can tease me all you want Sam Lake, I'll believe it when I see it. (And that's another problem, too, the AWE expansion did very little aside from say, "Hey, maybe, maybe, Alan Wake-y, too?") Control is a mixed bag, as some cool cats would say, but more than that, I think it's uneven. Its concepts, art direction, and level design are robust and constantly jaw-dropping. Again, these visuals are just... I don't know, pick a word out of a hat that's synonymous with exasperated admiration - they're phenomenal. But execution is just as important to me as intention, and I don't think Control sticks the landing where it needs to.
3 out of 5.
"I'm the Director of the Federal Bureau of Control and you've gotta deal with it!"
2021
"It's good to be back."
Agent 47's journey continues in Hitman 3 the latest title in IO Interactive's illustrious stealth-action franchise. Following the events of Hitman 2, 47 joins former antagonist Lucas Grey in the hunt for the last remaining members of Providence, the elusive shadow organization that's plagued the agents of the ICA for the past few games. If you've played either of IO's recent Hitman titles, Hitman 3 will be like stepping back into the comfortable shoes of 47, as the gameplay, level design, and replayability are all comparable to its predecessors. With some new improvements to movement, better graphical fidelity, and IO's commitment to making this game an all-in-one package, Hitman 3 shines as the conclusion to 47's five-year journey through multiple publishers, and his even longer journey to widespread acclaim.
Narratively, Hitman 3 isn't anything to write home about. IO have attempted to weave an emotional core through their new trilogy to less than promising results; 47 isn't a character with goals or interesting motivations, he's a vessel for the player to experiment in the expertly designed sandboxes of each level. The conclusion to this story is as middling as the previous two titles' setup. The Constant is not as charismatic or threatening as IO makes him out to be, the conflict between 47 and the ICA has no impact whatsoever, and Diana Burnwood is - as always - a poor woman's M. Nevertheless, Hitman 3 persists, because a narrative isn't why these games are successful (though having a decent one would be a plus). No, the narrative merely provides context for the systems-driven, comically-infused stealth gameplay that has defined this series since the early 2000s.
Hitman 3's gameplay is the most refined of the new trilogy, giving 47 more fluidity of movement and access to more tools and gag items than ever before. It's not Metal Gear Solid levels of smoothness, but the sheer volume of interactivity with and problem-solving within the world is astronomical. Hitman 3 goes out of its way to throw the player in complex worlds with increasingly difficult directives. At first, the game treats missions like Hitman or Hitman 2, giving the player defined targets with dramatically ironic "story" assassinations tied to their deaths, but as The Constant chips away at 47's resources, the missions become less defined with more room for error and increasingly slippery targets. Hitman 3 doesn't exactly stick the landing in this regard, as the final level is a very linear kill order with little variety, but because of the trilogy's progression system and unlock tree, going back to the well of previous missions is not out of the question for any prospective player who feels the need to master the greater challenges that the game has to offer.
Personally, Hitman 2 was the peak of this soft-rebooted series, the locales and mission structures were dynamic with fun twists for each assassination (if played right). Hitman 3 stumbles here and there conceptually and narratively, but is still a worthy successor to the previous entries. And if - like me - you much prefer the last title, Hitman 3 comes packaged with Hitman and Hitman 2 provided you already own them, making Hitman 3 a hub for the definitive world of assassination. The next time I review this game will be for the PSVR run of all three games. In the meantime, happy hunting, agents.
3.5 out of 5.
Interesting to see IO reuse cutscenes from Hitman: Contracts for this one.
Agent 47's journey continues in Hitman 3 the latest title in IO Interactive's illustrious stealth-action franchise. Following the events of Hitman 2, 47 joins former antagonist Lucas Grey in the hunt for the last remaining members of Providence, the elusive shadow organization that's plagued the agents of the ICA for the past few games. If you've played either of IO's recent Hitman titles, Hitman 3 will be like stepping back into the comfortable shoes of 47, as the gameplay, level design, and replayability are all comparable to its predecessors. With some new improvements to movement, better graphical fidelity, and IO's commitment to making this game an all-in-one package, Hitman 3 shines as the conclusion to 47's five-year journey through multiple publishers, and his even longer journey to widespread acclaim.
Narratively, Hitman 3 isn't anything to write home about. IO have attempted to weave an emotional core through their new trilogy to less than promising results; 47 isn't a character with goals or interesting motivations, he's a vessel for the player to experiment in the expertly designed sandboxes of each level. The conclusion to this story is as middling as the previous two titles' setup. The Constant is not as charismatic or threatening as IO makes him out to be, the conflict between 47 and the ICA has no impact whatsoever, and Diana Burnwood is - as always - a poor woman's M. Nevertheless, Hitman 3 persists, because a narrative isn't why these games are successful (though having a decent one would be a plus). No, the narrative merely provides context for the systems-driven, comically-infused stealth gameplay that has defined this series since the early 2000s.
Hitman 3's gameplay is the most refined of the new trilogy, giving 47 more fluidity of movement and access to more tools and gag items than ever before. It's not Metal Gear Solid levels of smoothness, but the sheer volume of interactivity with and problem-solving within the world is astronomical. Hitman 3 goes out of its way to throw the player in complex worlds with increasingly difficult directives. At first, the game treats missions like Hitman or Hitman 2, giving the player defined targets with dramatically ironic "story" assassinations tied to their deaths, but as The Constant chips away at 47's resources, the missions become less defined with more room for error and increasingly slippery targets. Hitman 3 doesn't exactly stick the landing in this regard, as the final level is a very linear kill order with little variety, but because of the trilogy's progression system and unlock tree, going back to the well of previous missions is not out of the question for any prospective player who feels the need to master the greater challenges that the game has to offer.
Personally, Hitman 2 was the peak of this soft-rebooted series, the locales and mission structures were dynamic with fun twists for each assassination (if played right). Hitman 3 stumbles here and there conceptually and narratively, but is still a worthy successor to the previous entries. And if - like me - you much prefer the last title, Hitman 3 comes packaged with Hitman and Hitman 2 provided you already own them, making Hitman 3 a hub for the definitive world of assassination. The next time I review this game will be for the PSVR run of all three games. In the meantime, happy hunting, agents.
3.5 out of 5.
Interesting to see IO reuse cutscenes from Hitman: Contracts for this one.