beam attack

I said the funny from the Failboat, laugh

fucking laugh

Every other Momodora:

Kaho/Momo: Time to stop the evil curse and kill these monsters with the power of my sacred maple leaf!

The first Momodora:

Isadora: Time to break into a temple and kill these monsters with the power of my sacred maple leaf and this gun I found.

The bus in this game sure went through a desert, alright. The same can be said for what I'd describe what my brain felt like after 5+ minutes of playing this.




Hey guys, Peter Griffin here to explain the joke. You see, backloggd user Okaten previously wrote a review on Crazy Bus (https://www.backloggd.com/u/Okaten/review/1653516/) that was structured very similarly to this review of Desert Bus. He calls his brain a desert because he felt nothing through those 10 minutes of playing it, just like how there's usually nothing in a real desert.

This is one of the first hacks I played when I first got into Pokemon Rom Hacks, and I'd say parts of it still hold up. It has plenty of main and post game content contained in a pretty diverse region. It has fakemon that aren't too popular, but I'd say there's a good plethora of hard hitting designs among the few stinkers.
The regular difficulty of the game is grueling in an odd way, especially at the start of the game. Most trainers will be around your level, but Gym Leaders start off far ahead of the curve and you can't catch up to them by playing the game normally. There is another version of this game called Vega Minus, which just lowers this level curve to make the Gym Leaders more fair and actually fun. It does come with the side effect of making some regular trainers a joke, but it's the more worthwhile version in the long term, given how unfair base Vega can feel. There's also another version that adds the Fairy typing, which turns the game into peak fiction if you're the world's biggest Ice-type Gardevoir Aurostice fan.
Part of me wants to call it an underrated hack, but then I remember the puzzles. One of the puzzles in this hack is the one in the 7th gym (Psychic type), where you have to navigate a labyrinth with a combination of moving boulders and ice physics. The gym requires extremely precise timing to land on or avoid boulders while sliding on ice. The beauty of this dungeon is that it's an effective tutorial on how to make good use of the emulator rewind feature. It's so perfect that no Romhacker has made a patch to outright skip it, and that's a good thing. If I had to suffer through that gym at one point in my life, it's only fair that everyone else I know that's playing this game should suffer through it too.

This is one of those games that, when my younger self saw it being announced on Youtube, I just went "oh cool, these reviewers I watch are in a dating sim" and moved on from there.
Fast forward years later to graduating college, I settle down, get ready to relax for a while, and head to bed after the ceremony. As I drift to sleep and into dreams, old memories of all I had done in my life before college come back to me. But when one particular memory comes back, I suddenly jolt awake in a cold sweat. I notice that an hour has passed and the world outside remains pitch black in the dead of night. In this darkness and silence, I utter the words:


D̶̨̙̳̟͊͆̉̇́́̄ͅͅĄ̸͖͈̘͕̞̜͓̉̆̽͌̈́Ḿ̸̻̫̾́͠Ṇ̶̡̅̏̉,̴̛͖̮͓͇͊ ̸̡̯̞͎̦̤̑̋̅̓̇T̴̳͉͖̤͖̔͂͋́̊̈́̎̚H̸̺̪͇̲̩̲͔̒̓̀͜͠Ǫ̴̞̜͋͂̚S̵̞̦̹̮̓E̸̛͈͖͖̲͕̒̏̏̅͂̍͂͜͝ͅ ̸̢̝̣̹͙̲̔̇̉͌̂͘̕̚G̶̝̞̫̓̄̐̆̈́͗̕͜͠Ȧ̶̤̌́́̎̾̕͝M̸̦͙̳̗̜̿͗͋̋͛̉̑͘͝Ĩ̸̤̥̺̆̾̓̀͂̃̓͊N̶̗͒̉̌G̸̯̠̺̰͉̙̈ ̸̗̋̎̈́Ý̷̯̗̻͎̻̳̍̍̈͝Ò̸̾̑̀̀͂͗̚̚ͅU̷̟̘̫͍̭̐̅͌͜͝T̶̢̜̦̭̬͔̳̂̃Ų̸͎̰͔̠͙̖̠͖̈́B̸̲̲͇͛E̴̤̼̎̄̉̅̚͝Ŗ̷̜̺͚͕̒͌̓̽͗ͅŚ̸̢͎̻̝́̎̋̀̋͝ ̷̧̧̨̛̯̩͙͈̈́͌̑͋̕I̷̳̦͉͍̿̓̉̉̓̐ ̸̺͇̜̻͋́́̀̓̈́̉̈́̚͜ͅͅŬ̵̥̦̩͙͎̙̤̜̒̿͆͠͝S̶̫̐͆͊́͊̾̕͘͘Ȩ̵̛̜̏̓̐̍͒͘͝D̷̪̜̞̺̎̏̊̇͒̕͝͝ ̸͍̣͍̗͇̗̱̆T̸̩͇͍̦͔͍͎̺̈́̈ͅǪ̴̩̺͙̙̰̏̀̂ ̸̘͓͚̼͓̜͊͛̾̎Ẁ̵̼̣̂͋̿̅ͅA̷̧͍͈̮͖͕̐͆T̵̹̻͍͑͒̓͐͗̕C̷̯̱̯̀̾̈́̓̂̈́̕Ḩ̸͓̼̲̞̭͈̀́͗̓̄̎̽́̿ ̵̧̼̥̩̳͛͗͛͜R̷̻͓̿̓̆͒͛͘͝Ḙ̴̗̝͍̝͉̱͚̍̅͐̌̐A̴͙͕͍͕̠̹̞͇̩̽L̶̢̳̮͕̥̔̾́̓̉̽L̷̪̟͈̗̘̍̓̃̊Y̵̢̨̡͕̮̖̳̳̯͌͛̎̊́ ̸͔̝͕̫̯͔̤̖̈́͊̎P̸͉͔̰͔̈́͐̀̚ͅU̵̘͓̟̱͍̝̳͙͌̈́̓T̷͎͍̼͚̮̺̎̚ ̷̝̘̮͙̟͈̈́̍̌̏̎̑̃T̵̥͎͎͚̹̙̙̠̮͐Ḧ̴̢̫͕̬̀͊͗̀̌̕Ę̶̛͖̩̞̳̹̝̟̬͊̆̎̑͋͛͠͠M̸̢̢̝̘̜̙̀̏̍̎͆̕S̸̨̡̨̘̖̲̞͙̒́͂́̓̽̽͘̕ͅÊ̴̯͔̔̒̽̈́͑͗L̵̢̫̫̼͎̤̤͈̄͋̂́̐̏͒̂̓V̴̨̡̤̞̺̞̊͛͂̽͐͒̆͝͝Ę̶̣̫̬͓͙̣̗͗́̽̾̆S̸̛̬̭̮̯̣̿͘ ̵̟͉̼̖̟̉͑̏̀͋Ḯ̵̡̳͕͗̃̀̾̕N̵̛̖̦̗̩͚͍̏ ̸̥̹͑̍̎̐̒̕Ä̵̧̹͎̗́̀̀̅̇̀͂͝͠ ̵̤̻̫̼̔́͒͂͆̋͐̕̕H̵̡̡̎̅̂̐̈́I̸͔̼̐̇̍̌̅̿G̶̨͉̈́̀̋͠H̸̢̦̤͍̖͇͎͎͋̽̉̒͘͠ ̶̲̳̓ͅS̷̟̯̖̓C̴̺͚̟͔̮̭̼̞͈̎͂̑͆̈́́͘͘H̶̯̰̗̲̲̜͝O̴̫̝̱̗͚͊O̴͈̓̏̉̕͝L̸̥͋̀̎͑̎̿̑̀̽ ̵̨̭̯͎͕̽̅͠D̶͚̟̮͖̆Ǎ̵̢̘̰͉̻͚̭͙̋̀̐͘ͅŢ̵̦̲̟͉͙͇̐͌͛͆̚̕Ì̶̡̬͙̙̣̩͕̀̌̆͗̐͝N̶̢̹̹̗̫̍͗̅ͅG̶̛̬̩͙̹̠̓̂̆̄̔̈͝ ̴͙̫̬͇͌̂̀͛͂̚̕͝ͅS̶̖̗͈̼̻̑̂I̵̜̯̿̓̎̅͌̉̌̚͠M̴̨̨̝̙̙͖̺̼̈̌̓̈́̀̔̀.̵̹̘̜̬̖̲̐̋